For agreeing to a dog I do not want!

[Hotair1234]

Just that really. Grew up with big dogs and they just give me the ick, the smell, the poop, the drool, everything.

I know that’s already made me a horrible person but I dont dislike dogs per se, just don’t ever want to live with one. Have cats.

Dd(15) has been desperate for a dog for years. I’ve always been very firm against but recently come up again as her mental health has taken an absolute dive the last few years. Have spent year going on and on about the responsibility/commitment, she’s still keen.

As a reward for sh*y hospital visit I agreed to go to a rescue centre (secretly hoping smell and staff going on about responsibility would be off putting) but I was also aware we might end up with a little dog - like Maltese or chihuahua or something, but she fell in love with a huge bloody collie!!!! 🥺🥺🥺Wouldn’t be swayed by anything cute.

Booked in to go and collect him next week and am completely dreading it. I know it’s everything she needs and couldn’t be more sure about the commitment but I hate the idea now, will hate the idea more next week.

Aibu to still live with a dog I don’t want?? Has anyone else been here but ended up liking? Help 😭😭😭

@Amipreg1 I don't think the OP said she couldn't show the dog love?

A dog is a fantastic idea. Just not this one - unless possibly it’s an older bearded collie.
Phone the rescue and tell them dad has fallen in love with the dog but you can’t regime it due to size and temperament. They’re naughty to let you pick- Battersea offers particular dogs. Ask the rescue to suggest a different one, perhaps visiting without her and tell her the Rescue want to place her with a family better suited not care for her.
I’d recommend a smaller maybe older dog.

Dogs are not good mental-health props for young teenagers.

You're sentencing yourself to 14 years, let's be realistic, of looking after a dog you don't want.

I am sorry but there is no way this would work.

@Hotair1234
PLEASE DO NOT GET A COLLIE.
Someone I know got one, pestered by her kids, she gave in, got the Collie, and it has been a disaster for the poor dog.

Kids lost interest fast.
A Collie needs masses of stimulation, both mental and physical to keep it sane.
Their once smart house looks a shadow of it's former self. The dog is bored and neurotic.
She barks. A lot. They have fitted an anti bark collar to her. Not fair.

Chewed doors, trashed garden, where the dog just paces a circle around it.{stereotypies} constantly & manically.

Don't, if you love dogs, get a collie.

They are for absolutely dedicated, committed owners who do sports like flyball or agility and who Devote hours a day to their dog, OR the owners work sheep or cattle.
I'm shocked the rescue centre is even countenancing a collie.

Beg pardon?

Wot a tricky situation. If you pull out your DD will be devastated and even though as some will say that’s not the point the fact is you have said she has suffered a lot over the years and this will not help.
To be honest you agreed to look at rescue. You were not forced and you didn’t have to agree to a large dog that could have been the compromise. I think it would be cruel to back out now. You have had dogs and if your daughter does the keg work it will do her good. My DH was not to keen on getting a dog and yet now our Dog is his shadow and he adores her.

Your post was very clear. Can't imagine what you think any of us misread.

It sounds a pretty crap ''Rescue'' if it's letting you choose.

Decent rescues ''Marry up'' a suitable dog with the potential people who want one's lifestyles.

I wouldn’t adopt from a rescue that thinks novice owners would work well with a collie tbh

Collies are lovely highly intelligent dogs but they need an awful lot of attention and exercise! I think a greyhound would be a better fit They sleep most of the day away and are more than happy with a Trot round the block. They don't drool either.

Don't do it. I have a big Alsatian I didn't want, I absolutely hate the dribbling, farting, stinking, hairy, muddy mess of it all. Mine is 4 and I'm never ever ever living with a dog again after this one is no longer with us. Husband and kids adore the dog they feed and take out and pick up shut after once in a blue moon. I, the cat lover who has somehow been handed 90% of the dog care, do most definitely not.

Collies re absolutely the WORST type of dog for this situation.
They need so much work, dedication and stimulation if they aren't to become a problem.
This one has already had one home, and been given up on.
OP doesn't want a dog.
a PP have said, a collie is the worst sort to get.

Successful collie owners are absolutely dedicated to training and working their dog.

Ha! But I guess it's so easy to judge. I probably would be shouting a dog who was weeping and pooing in the house.

I would cancel on the collie, but maybe not on a dog quite yet. I would get your daughter to start doing a load of breed research; which dog breeds suit your family's lifestyle and I would look at fostering, rescue centre dog walking (if you can take your daughter) and/or Borrow My Doggy. It would give your daughter a taster without the full-time committment.

Seriously don't do it. We got a dog after much pressure from dd. But she was 8 and I was prepared to have a dog. I chose the breed - small. I took the hit of organising dog care, working from home, having the dog follow me around all the time, being responsible for his walks etc., organising holidays around him, paying for someone to mind him when we are away. My dd, aged 8 wasn't capable of doing any of this and neither is your dd aged 15.

At 15 that same dd had a lot of MH issues - quite serious ones. The dog was not a help. She had nothing left over to mind the dog or pay attention to him other than an odd tickle. the other kids who didn't have issues were way more capable.

This is a bad idea for everyone, including the dog.

I agree.. A small greyhound is a far more suitable choice. Greys are calm and cat like. Sleep a lot, don't need much exercise.

Foster. You can help the dogs, and their families, who need it. Your daughter gets the support but the dogs go home to their family after a while. Up to you if you continue, you can take a break etc. Can stop when daughter leaves.

My sister had a collie. It came to my house for the first time, got out the back garden, went around two huge fields and rocked up back at my front door like a human! We still talk about it - it really was so funny! That’s how intelligent they are though.

OP why don't you get your daughter to do Dog Therapy? The therapist and the dog would come to your house, do certain techniques with the dog, walk the dog, feed it, stroke it.

I took that as response to the immediate post below talking about the OP not loving the dog (which she never said anything about love and affection)

What skills would OP have to foster, she doesnt really like dogs, would choose to have one and her daughter may have high needs.

Not any old person can foster animals, theres lots of expectations and requirements.

When your daughter leaves home, you'll probably still have the dog.

A collie? No chance. They need a LOT of work.

I think it would be a bad idea

I am a absolutely amazed you passed the home check.

What rescue is this? A good home checker would have worked out that you don't really want it and would 100% advise again a collie as a first dog.

I'm a very experienced revisers/foster/home checker and I would not get a collie. I adore them but they are a working breed and a full time kind of dog. Certainly not a dog for an unsure person.

Get another cat. Rescues one that's got loads of personality and behaves like a dog. Get one that's been in foster - where they can tell you what it's like.

Borrow my doggy if she wants/needs a dog fix.