To have these kind of dinners when DH is away?

[DaphneeBridgerton]

Backstory: I do have anxiety and depression which is a lot worse since having DD 14 months ago, am starting fluoxetine tomorrow and have had various types of therapy but investigating more

So I think I’m second-guessing myself / looking for a bit of reassurance but do want to keep it lighthearted if possible!

Whenever DH is away overnight for work (once or twice a week usually) I can never be bothered to cook myself a ‘proper’ meal…

When he’s here I will cook things like lasagne, stir fry, shepherds pie, risotto etc for us both but when left to my own devices I can’t be bothered and end up eating things like a fried egg sandwich, beans on toast or even a packet of spicy rice with some avocado on the side. I always eat but never anything really wholesome or complicated.

Also I do cook for my DD - tonight she had waffles, scrambled egg and broccoli as an example. So she’s not suffering!

Is this my depression? Is this something other people do? Or am I just lazy?! I genuinely think I just like simpler meals, my mum is very similar but I’m just wondering what other people think.

I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're eating. The one day a week my DC's dad gives them dinner from the chip shop, I never cook myself a 'proper meal'. It's my day off cooking. I wasn't that hungry tonight so I just had a yogurt and an apple.

When my dh is away I order a sneaky takeaway and get it delivered. Son keeps shtum as does not want it to stop. Ha ha

Cheese, crackers, tomatoes
Sliced apple dipped in peanut butter
Avocado toast
Egg on toast
Omelette
Hummus and pitta

To be fair I think DH does similar when I'm away but featuring things like sardines and black pudding.

Not sure why we bother eating 'properly' when together!

No point in making extra washing up, I agree!

That's very normal OP. When I'm alone I often just have ramen or a sandwich or even tinned soup. It's ok to have a break.

Absolutely normal I'd say! When my DH is away it's usually buttery pasta for me

Sometimes when dh is away, i’ll cook pasta and just melt cheese on it. Quick, simple, easy and delicious. We all do it!

A 3-egg cheese omelette does the job for me when DH is away!

Dh is away and I've had a bottle of cava and crisps

I fluctuate between having things like cheese on toast and raiding the freezer and using up the odd (beef, salmon, lamb etc) steaks to make myself a 'nice' meal. Steak and two veg is such an easy meal for one. I think it's normal to make yourself an easy meal when you're alone. I'd never do something like a lasagne just for one.

When dh works late or goes way I usually have a cheese and onion toastie with a good book on the sofa . Bliss .

I've actually stopped having proper dinners for the most part. I Painswick have a meal, but more often its a few slides of cheese or a bowl or cereal or microwave popcorn.

YABVU

It should be crisps and dips when you're on your own

huge bowl of steamed veg, mixed with lentil stew and a side of marmite marinated mushrooms.

my ex was Australian and any meal without meat wasn’t a meal.

so I would mainline fresh baked veg.

now we are divorced, and so I get to enjoy this or variations of it every night.

bliss AND my health, skin and hair are the best they have ever been

None of the things you mention are particularly unhealthy - they’re perfectly nutritious meals. When DH travelled all the time I never really properly cooked for myself, I just had whatever I fancied once the kids were in bed - it felt like a real luxury, actually. And I also stayed up much, much later than I would normally have done - just watching movies, bimbling about, whatever. Not quite sure what that was about (maybe just a bit of respite in the midst of family chaos?), but I know I found that time very nourishing - peace and quiet, doing whatever I wanted and having no one to worry about except myself!

You are way overthinking this. And not in a bad way, but who cares what you eat? It's not all the time, and you are allowed to have easy meals.

Your depression and anxiety are making you overthink and doubt yourself.
Your dinners are completely fine! Enjoy getting to eat exactly what you want a couple of times a week.

In fact when dh is away, it's takeout for me.

I‘m with you op. I quite like cooking, but I swear if the rest of the family did not exist I would live off cheese omelette or avocado or scrambled egg or buttered toast, with a banana or some strawberries on the side. It’s fine 💐for you and I hope you are soon better.

Why on earth would you cook twice?! Just make more and reheat, surely.

I'm exactly the same OP. If it wasn't for DH I'd barely eat a vegetable as I'm so lazy when he's not here!

Having provided family meals for decades, if I'm on my own, not ever enough, I just graze when I'm hungry , I bloody love it ; slice of toast , raw carrot, biscuit or a handful of raisins. No meal times, no planning , no mess, no washing up.. what's not to like !

Absolute perks of them working away! I'm the same, feed the kid a decent dinner and I have whatever I fancy (usually the stuff DH won't eat).

I’ve had cereal for dinner the past 3 nights in a row 🤷🏻‍♀️

I really enjoy cooking. But these days I only do proper meals when my DC are here or when my BF comes over (when DC aren't here). Otherwise I eat random leftovers or something really simple. BF cooks when I go to his.

Beans on toast feels like a super easy treat and leaves me with more time to do other stuff with my child-free evenings!

Definitely sounds ok to me. At least once a week, the rest of the family eat out as I have a hobby group I attend. I have the most random shite for tea that day. I bloody look forward all week for that meal too.
I've also had coco pops for lunch and breakfast at work twice this week too. I think I'm suffering from low mood and I seriously can't be bloody arsed to cook/prepare myself anything when I don't have to.