Naked neighbours

[Sunshine10012]

The fence that belongs to our neighbour is only a low wire for half the garden and then one panel that rotting and falling down and large gap that we have to cover with a huge plant plot to keep their dog out of our garden.
our neighbours have just had renovations done to their home, a new extension, new patio etc.
but they haven’t replaced the fence.
they sit out all day long in their underwear sunbathing.
my children can’t use the paddling pool, I can’t even garden because it feels too awkward.
for 7 years I’ve felt like I’ve shared a garden.
we can’t afford to replace the fence ourselves.
is it unreasonable to ask that they replace their broken fence seeing as they insist on sunbathing half naked everyday? what Would you do?

Couldn’t see a problem with this tbh 😁 one of our neighbours (she’s 92!) is currently sunbathing sporting a thong bikini, good on em 😁

Maybe they can’t get anyone to do the fencing? We tried to get a repair done on ours and the waiting lists in our area were a year long! Ended up doing it ourselves.

helpmeimamum
**
There are quite a few childfree and childless women on here - I'm one of the latter. There are also a few men - I'm not one of them.

@10hailmarys to be fair I hadn't yet seen the message with the 7 exclamation mark before I wrote mine, that made me twig . There have been a few punctuation happy posters over the years.

@JinglingHellsBells if you don't know what I'm on about, I suggest you start reading Terry Pratchett.

{mention:helpmeimamum} you've got me, I'm not real. I'm a figment of my own imagination.

I too am extraordinarily disappointed that this turned out to not actually be about naked neighbours.

Here's the thing, OP - why don't you pop round, or perhaps invite your neighbours round to yours, and have a chat about a boundary solution that would work for both of you and offer to split the cost? You don't have to mention the (not) naked thing, though.

You can be both nice and polite and firm at the same time, I promise.

If they are in swimwear that's so ridiculous! Do you never go to a pool or beach?? Us and our neighbours chat over the fence in our swimwear lol! Nothing rude about it.

Amazed you've been unhappy for seven years and not done more to fix it. Life's too short and next summer will roll around just as quickly.
Be grateful they're in underwear, I sometimes sunbathe naked

I'd find it annoying and awkward with the neighbours lounging in their underwear just feet away. I wouldn't like having to see them all the time even if they were fully clothed, tbh, but underwear does feel more intimate than swimwear.

You can ask them to replace the fence, but I'd not mention that their sunbathing has anything to do with it. I'd probably just save up for some cheap bamboo screening, as suggested up-thread. Failing that, put up a line and hang sheets to give yourself some privacy.

@pointythings I have zero desire to read Terry Pratchet. I do understand the overuse of exclamation marks though (as a professional writer.)

I remember my mum sunbathing in her bra back in the 70s, wasn't a big deal then and isn't now.

Prehaps it’s been explained but why can’t your children use the padding pool

theres not much point sunbathing fully clothed

just a point of warning if you don’t like people sunbathing in any state of undress never go to a beach, an hotel swimming pool while abroad.

LOL!! What do you do at the beach with all the 'naked' people around?? 🤣

FGS get a life.

I think 'Helena' is probably a teenage boy having a laugh.

So not naked then.. 🙄

I hope that her kids are fully dressed in the paddling pool. If not, pass me the smelling salts.

OP, your neighbours are not naked so why pretend they are? They are sunbathing in their own garden wearing something you don't like. To say your children 'can't use the paddling pool' because your neighbours are on the other side of a fence in their pants is absolute nonsense. What do you think is going to happen to your children if they see someone lying on a sun-lounger in their bra and knickers, exactly? Heaven forbid you should ever take them to a beach in the South of France or something, because they'll see an awful lot more than that, I can assure you.

If you don't want to see your neighbour's undies, put some bamboo screening up.

The people in the house that backs on to ours are a retired couple who, literally at the first hint of even the weakest, coolest sunshine, are immediately out there on sun-loungers on their decking, similarly attired to your neighbours. We use them as a barometer, basically. I'll say 'Is it going to be warm today?' when I'm about to get dressed, and DP will say 'Hang on, I'll just see if Terry and June* are on the decking'.

I massively admire them tbh; they're living their best lives

*we don't know their real names

Clickbait title. Neighbours are not naked. Stop looking in neighbors garden/at neighbours and get on with life.

YABVU.

Is it def there fence to replace ? Even if it is they don't have to but there is no harm in asking
Sometimes people also give away free panels or screening so may be worth looking to see of you can get something

Have you asked your neighbours to replace the fence??

But don't stay in. Let your dc use the garden. Use it yourself! Don't let your neighbours put you off.

I wish I had the opportunity to lie in garden half naked but I will do when we get a house.. currently in a flat with communal gardens with other neighbours taking over with drinking and loud music. Thank your lucky stars you have your own garden. The neighbours could walk round starkers for all I care just give me a garden 😂

Very disappointed that this isn’t a thread about actually naked neighbours.

Surely a fence is just as much your responsibility to put up as theirs. As other’s suggest, get some bamboo if you can’t afford a fence. I don’t see any issue with them enjoying their garden in their underwear.

Your choices are

1. Suck it up and just go about your business in your garden.


2. Save for a fence and put up something makeshift in the meantime


3. Don't use your garden.

Third option seems like cutting off your nose to spite your face, so I’d suggest either getting over yourself or whacking up some bamboo.

They’re not required to erect a fence, as long as there is a defined boundary. They do have a responsibility to keep their pet under control and off your property though, so you could ask them to replace the fence under this guise but they may just correct the missing panel.

They’re not naked, as PPs have pointed out this is akin to them wearing swimwear, which they’re perfectly entitled to do in their own garden. Why can’t your children use the paddling pool? And why are your children allowed to be in swimwear “half naked” but your neighbours aren’t? You’re restricting your children because you have hang ups on bodies / clothing. Stop it and let the kids out there.

I don't think you're being unreasonable OP. No one wants to see semi naked neighbours but TBH I'd be more annoyed about their dog having open access to my garden.

Are you my neighbours? I've just come in from MY garden where I was displaying my 50 something wobbly body in all it's glory in a very small bikini.

I did go out out in my snow suit originally but got a bit warm 🙄

What kind of monsters use their own garden to relax in while wearing clothing suitable for sunbathing? My heart bleeds for you. Mumsnet gets more crazy every day.

Do you ever go to the beach op?
it’s full of ‘naked’ people