To leave 4 year old alone in pool

[CatTurd]

With armbands on and me sitting at the side on a sun lounger.

Just curious because I noticed all the other parents getting in or
following their 4/5/6 yr olds around. Maybe I’m being too relaxed.

I let my 5yo go in a friends pool recently and watched from the side. Like a hawk. No phone/book. Chatting to her all the time. My DC can swim. If she couldn’t I would have been in with her, arms bands or not. Another parent watched the older kids.

Are you insane? My daughter was swimming without armbands at 2.5 and could get in and out of the pool safely and I wouldn't have done that. It only takes a second.

At 4 I stayed on the side of the pool for swimming lessons whilst she was in the water with the instructor.

I wouldn't let my 6 year old in the pool on his own whilst I stayed on the sun lounger in a busy pool. I might in an empty private pool though. He can swim without armbands.

Op some information for you. Scotland has 5million of a population. I don't have the stats for England to hand.

2021 Had 130 water related deaths.
2020 Had 141 road accident deaths.

People are all really aware of roads, and carseats yet water isn't getting anywhere near the same publicity. People aren't making lots of money out of arm bands the way they do cars and car seats.

I was in Spain last week and a man was actually asked to leave the hotel as he'd left his two children unsupervised in the pool twice. Not sure how old they were but both looked to be under 6 and the little boy who was the oldest got stuck underneath someone else's lilo and another parent had to help him.
I think you should be in the pool with him, regardless of how well you think you're supervising from the side it only takes you to look away and miss something for something to happen. Unlikely maybe but not impossible and I wouldn't like to risk it

Unless your child can swim, then you should be in the pool. From time you on side of pool if your child is in distress by time you get in child will be traumatised.

That's very polite.

I wouldn't even let a 4 year old sit in the bath on their own.

My friend is a swim instructor and her kid has never used armbands.

Her approach is "hold them in your arms until they can swim independently".

This is so interesting to read- I was raised by the sea in a Latin American country and was playing out and swimming in the sea with other children and even alone by the time I was four or five. I don't remember any children drowning. I remember a fisherman drowning but people think he probably had a heart attack or a stroke while tying up his boat and fell into the water between the boat and the dock.

My own children were basically swimming before they could walk in the late 1990s and spent weeks every summer holiday in my hometown swimming and playing in the sea with their cousins just like I did. Yes I know it sounds insane and it was a risk but they were far more athletic, confident, and independent than other children their age, and remain so as adults, so I think the risk was worth it. They are also incredibly nostalgic for and thankful for their free range childhoods.

If I had a four-year-old now, and she could swim as well as I could or my children could at that age, I would let her swim while I was in my lounge chair. I would even read a book or have a chat with another adult. I would not, however, let her swim completely unsupervised until she was double-digit ages or even older. I have a baby granddaughter and of course will follow her parents' lead to the letter as she gets older and I'll be interested to see how her parents deal with these situations and if they will be more or less in favour of constant and close supervision than their peers.

I belong to a water rescue organisation. If you do this you are nothing short of stupid, and if you think that’s rude, tough!

You wouldn't be allowed to do it in your local pool so why on earth would you think it's ok because you are abroad?

Most pools don’t allow unsupervised children under the age of 8.

I think if you’re watching the child and could get to them to save them within seconds if they went under then it’s not so bad but I think I’d probably just stay in there with them.

My son is 3 and can swim he’s been going too swimming lessons since he was 2 weeks old. There is no way on this earth I wouldn’t get in the water with him

You need to be in arms reach of her at this age lovely, they can slip under very quickly, you think you can get to them in time but it's often more difficult than you think and so easy to get distracted for a few minutes x

I’m taking on board what people have said and I realise I wasn’t watching like a hawk. I’ll be getting in with her tomorrow or sitting right on the side with my feet in

OP' last post for anyone who missed it in their rush to call her a neglectful parent.

Fuck me, I hate cancel the cheque threads.

Well here’s another eye roll just for you OP
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We have our own pool so my dgc is the only one in it in these circumstances and we got in with him until he was 6 and could swim and even now he’s 9 I never take my eyes off him.
Also a good tip for all parents
Always have a designated person watching the dc.
If you need to leave the pool ask dp or other person to be the designated person and check they are listening and understand.
It’s too easy to assume the other person is keeping watch over dc.

Levi’s Legacy on fb is also worth looking at.

This thread has caused my palms to sweat as it's surfaced a memory of when I was a young teenager at the local pool. People started yelling and screaming a small child was pulled out of the main pool, unconscious. Two mums seemed to be sat nearby on the audience chairs, but I don't think it was them that first triggered the alarm.

Everyone was panicking and a pool staff member was trying to resucitate the toddler/very young child. I don't think they succeeded and an abulance crew turned up and took them away, still unconscious (I think).

It was terrifying to watch - escpially at that age as I couldn't fully grasp exactly what was going on. I just remember being so confused about how your mum could be nearby and yet you are still in danger. Like it was the first time it occured to me that mums were not perfect defences against all of life's dangers.

We were on holiday recently with my 2.5 year old. He was wearing a floating vest rather than armbands which I think are only slightly better than armbands. We were in the baby pool which was only up to my knee and he wanted to go down the little slide so I went round to the front to catch him and he fell down the slide steps and under the water. I was only 2 ft away from him but because other kids in the pool then moved in front of me and the general resistance of the water it took me a good 30 seconds to get to him and pull him up. It made me realise even more how easy it is for kids to drown because he was really making no splashing or attempts to get his face out the water, it was lucky I was watching him so intently.

OP, surely you mean a pre school paddling pool?

My son is currently in the kids pool, deepest past is only up to his waist. It's fine

You kind of missed the point. Almost as many people drowned as were killed in road accidents. Yet nobody is pushing awareness partly because there isn't £££ to be made out of it.

I have done this but re considering after reading these replies. My 4 year old is a strong swimmer (for a preschooler) and it’s our pool at home He’s only allowed in with me constantly watching and while his 12 year old brother is swimming at his side. But actually I think we’ve been a bit lax and need to change that.

Australian public swimming pool rules.

Attached now.

It’s easy to think that you won’t take your eyes off them but equally easy to be distracted by something, just for a few seconds, and that could be enough.