To leave 4 year old alone in pool

[CatTurd]

With armbands on and me sitting at the side on a sun lounger.

Just curious because I noticed all the other parents getting in or
following their 4/5/6 yr olds around. Maybe I’m being too relaxed.

Ten years ago, on holiday, DH and I were both watching toddler DS play in a children's pool from a couple of meters away. The water only came up to his thighs.

Another little boy who was running along a path next to the pool suddenly tripped and fell, and started bawling his little eyes out. Instinctively, DH and I looked around, trying to see if his parents had seen him.

In just those few seconds, DS silently slipped under the water. When we looked back, I screamed and DH plunged across the water to pull him out. Thankfully he was OK. I immediately vomited from the sheer horror of what had happened and still feel cold just thinking about it now.

The point is, even if you think you are watching, accidents can still happen. You need to be in the water.

DH and I not she and I!

So you weren't watching at all times either?

Sorry, not buying that.

*Armbands are shit. They restrict movement and shouldn't be used as a buoyancy aid.

That you think your kid is safe because they're wearing armbands suggests you don't know a lot about water safety tbh*

this.

i was another one who had to drag a kid in armbands out of a pool on holiday. He had floated out of his depth and was unable to swim back to safety, made worse by the armbands holding him upright with little arm mobility so he couldn’t actually propel himself anywhere once his feet couldn’t touch the bottom.

mum was watching, but was fully dressed on the poolside. She was stood shouting for him to swim back in. She needed to be jumping in and pulling him out. Clear ignorance on armbands and their safety.

this kid was nearer 7 as well.

Assuming a public pool? Hard to supervise from a distance with others also in pool. My parents have one and I happily supervise my 4 yr old from a chair at the side because he is either the only one in it or with his siblings, so far easier to spot if he gets into bother.

some people really worry me…

YABU. My son is 7 and I would still be in the pool with him. An accident could happen so quickly. I might reconsider when he turns 8. As well as that, he wants me in the pool to play with him.

They are usually trying to wind people up with threads like this. No one with an ounce of parental responsiblity thinks like this and posts on mn.

I'd be asking myself why you had to ask?

Is this a joke? It only takes a matter of seconds for something to happen, and where will you be? On the sun lounger? Ffs!

Who was rude? I think you're being defensive because people are pointing out what a bad idea this is. But if you didn't know, you don't know. You know now, don't risk yoyr child's life.

I'd sorry to say that the news stories at this time of year about kids drowning on holiday result from this type of behaviour. You need to be in the pool with them, within arm's reach if they cannot swim.

Well it made you pay attention to the fact that you are being foolish.

I think this is important too. Kids who are in pools abroad or holiday need to have swimming lessons.

Children can drown in under a minute.

So you need to be able to notice your child is in trouble, jump in, pull them out and start administering medical aid in under that time for this to be OK.

I let my child paddle in the shallow end of a hotel pool (lifeguard on duty) while I sat on a sun bed at the edge of the water and watched him (without taking my eyes off him). He was only metres away and I was confident I could get to him quickly. When he wanted to go in the deep end and actually swim, as opposed to playing with some pool toys on the step, either his dad or I went with him. If I wanted to read my book or look at my phone, I elbowed his dad who took over watching.

I can’t believe this was allowed. One of my kids was a lifeguard while going through uni and no matter where they worked the rule was a parent in the water within arms reach at all times for a kid that age. My child said they constantly had to yell out to parents to move to within an arms reach and if they refused, generally with ‘no, it’s okay, my child’s alright’, they were directed the alternative was to leave the pool immediately.

We've jut come back from Italy and I was very surprised by how many people were out of their pool while their pre-schoolers were swimming. In fact, I was the only one in the pool. Granted it was a small ish hotel pool and fairly empty i.e. one or two kids swimming but all the other parents sat by the pool and not in it.

As well as the other points that people have made bear mind that there will be at least one of those other parents in the pool who will actually be worried about your child and therefore feel obliged to keep an eye on them. And possibly have to change their own plans to watch your child. And, yes, they will be silently cursing you.
There is not a single pool in the UK that will let your 4 year old swim without a adult being within arms length (supervising from the side really not good enough either). There's a reason for that.

put your phone away op and get in the pool

My kids were both swimming without floaties by 3. At 4 I would sit on the side, with my legs in the water ready to jump in if needed, but I wasn’t in the pool. I didn’t take my eyes off them though.

drowning isn’t what you see in films, people thrashing about waving. A child can be face down and silent in seconds and someone might not even notice even if other adults around.

This.

We were on holiday with our 4 year old and he slipped over in what was essentially a paddling pool and his head went under. My husband was right next to him and pulled him up straightaway but it was still a frightening experience for him.

Please please get in the water with your child. And if you don’t want to don’t let them go in the water either and stay well away from the edge.

If the child needs armbands then you need to be in the pool (or a responsible adult)

Yes yabu

Oh and 🙄

it is great if this thread has made you change your approach but I’m genuinely curious as to why you thought it was ok in the first place? Do you swim often or is it just a holiday thing?