To think withdrawal is quite safe...

[LilyPotter44]

Whenever I see threads on here about natural family planning and the withdrawal method as means of contraception, people always act as if it's stupid and completely unreliable. Now don't get me wrong, it's not fool proof. But is it really as reckless as people make out?

Dh and I have recently had a baby (3 months ago) and are yet to sort contraception. I don't want to go back on the pill and he's thinking of getting a vasectomy but there's a wait. Having done my research it seems like withdrawal can work when done properly - i.e fully withdrawn a decent length of time before ejaculation not left right until the last second. Studies also seem to indicate that 'pre-ejaculate' for the most part doesn't contain sperm. So why are people so against it? Have you had any experience with it and did it work for you?

I've got 4 nieces and nephews downstairs who can tell you differently...

All unplanned, all conceived due to the withdrawal method.

Worked out in way It worked for about 3 years until it didn’t and I now have a 3 year old .

I don't think it's sensible to rely on a man to pull his dick out in time or to take a chance on precum. Why would you?

Did nobody learn after the first 3?

The middle two are twins! Fraternal twins 😂

if you wouldn’t be bothered by another pregnancy, then you aren’t really that concerned with sorting proper birth control. Relying on withdrawal when finding out you were pregnant would be bad news would make you irresponsible because it has low rates of effectiveness. Those couples need to abstain from Piv sex or find at least one real birth control method.

someone like op who doesn’t necessarily want to be pregnant, but clearly doesn’t mind shouldn’t be advocating ineffectual give birth control methods.

I guess if you do it right! There’s 14 months between my youngest two so obviously we didn’t 😂

Also this, you actually have little control of any of this and are relying on a man to have massive self control whilst approaching orgasm. I imagine a lot of accidents happen when he's just that little bit too late

We used it for about 4 years and didn't get pregnant. I got pregnant the first time we didn't use it so I think my DH must be very good at the timing. I think it's used a lot more than people think. Nobody will admit using it because of the comments you will get (like the ones on this post).

We've done the withdrawal method for 4 years. No pregnancy. Im very fertile as well.

It’s a difficult one. You know the theory. You listen to those who prove the theory wrong.
It doesn’t work sadly. You may want it to work, the risks of getting pregnant are high. It’s your choice.

There is enough sperm in pre-cum to populate the Isle of Wight. Maybe think about that…

Yes it worked for me but I only risked it when I knew I wasn't in the fertile stage of my cycle. I have an exact 28 day cycle and I know when there's a chance of pregnancy and when there's not. I've got 4 kids that I conceived quickly ( 2 were on my first cycle of trying) so I was pretty fertile before being sterilised. But I wouldn't have done it if another baby would have been a disaster. I think the main issue is not the precum having a tiny amount of sperm in it, it's the man reaching orgasm and in that split second, pulling out doesn't matter so he comes inside.

We've used it for 10 years so far, had 1 baby who was very much planned and I fell pregnant the first month we decided to try so obviously fairly fertile.

It can work if you're careful, most people just aren't. 🤷‍♀️

OP you specifically asked "is it really as reckless as people make out?" the answer is a resounding YES if you do not want a baby, simple as. If a baby isn't the end of the world and you'd BOTH be equally happy to conceive (i suspect this a method perhaps popular with men who don't like the idea of condoms but then expect the woman to deal with the consequences of the method failing) then of course go for it - in your particular circumstances it sounds as if you are both choosing it in a careful, considered way- but it's not considered a particularly successful method of contraception hence why people feel snippy about it, not everyone is going to be as thoughtful about it as you!!! likewise am from a catholic background and having done my family tree(!)am from a long line of people conceived before marriage for the very reason that people didn't feel able to use appropriate contraception for their circumstances.

Wilfully having unprotected sex when you definitely don't want a baby is one thing. But looking at odds, stats and then weighing it all up against your personal situation is another.

How is it not wilfully having unprotected sex when you definitely don't want a baby?

My ex partner and I used the withdrawal method. That child is now 22 :)
So didn't work for us.

We used it successfully for about three years before and between babies. The two times he (deliberately) didn’t withdraw I got pregnant. So I’d say we’re pretty fertile and if there was sperm in that pre cum I would have caught. Daren’t risk it anymore though as really don’t want more children.

You could ask my friend. He ended up in a loveless marriage for ten years after impregnating a woman on their third date using the withdrawal method (which I had taught him).

It can also work if you're lucky and not everyone is.

I guess you have to take into account and respect people who wish to do this method perhaps because of Religious grounds but I am another one for whom it did not work.

I’ve used this method for 16 years and only had my planned pregnancies. Fell pregnant first month so would say I’m pretty fertile

You happen to have a man who never secretes sperm into pre-cum. Other people happen to have a man who does. Literally the only way to tell the difference is to have withdrawal fail on you. Which is an idiotic risk to take if a pregnancy would be a problem.

Oh honestly! Pre-ejaculate fluid DOES contain sperm: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3564677/