Neighbour telling me to slow down

[SurfBox]

I live in an estate and today I was driving in to my driver and getting out of my car. My neighbour from about 6 houses up shouts at me ''can you drive slower?''

I had no idea I was driving fast as I go at the same speed everybody else does driving in. But I'd have no bother if somebody asked me politely and privately but she yelled it over 6 walls with other neighbours out about their business sitting watching.

AIBU to think she was rude and if you have a problem approach the neighbour face to face and not shout over a wall for all to see?

It really depends on your speed. If you were driving unsafely I can imagine getting annoyed and shouting over, though obviously not ideal.

She was rude to yell. But it's hard to imagine anyone doing that if you really are just doing the same speed as everyone else.

You should have a vague idea of the speed you're doing though if it's a road you drive down all the time
I do 10mph driving down our v short road and then 5mph to a stop and check at the end (cul de sac) as there's two high fences which hide children playing/cars/cats etc

It sounds like she could have been more tactful, but it’s more important to drive safely than to be tactful.

I had no idea I was driving fast

don;t know exactly my speed

Look at your speedometer? You sound like a dangerous driver.

I think this post said all we need to know.

I shout at men who are speeding all the time. Less politely than the OP’s neighbour too.

Shouting isn’t the best, but she didn’t swear or call you any insulting names.

This ☝️ Did it occur to you to walk over and talk to her about it?

I highly doubt that she just made this up and shouted at you for the hell of it.

I live on a typical residential road which used to be a cul-de-sac until the land at the end was developed. The number of boy racer types that drive far too fast along it is shocking. There are children playing out here regularly. It is the sort of road where the limit is 30mph, but 30 would actually be far too fast along it for the type of road it is and the type of things that might be going on there - children, animals etc.

Slow down. You were probably going faster than you think. You may have normalised that.

Reminds me of a neighbour I had who once asked me if I could breathe more quietly despite me being on the other side of the fence hauling branches and heavy lifting stuff in the garden. I just stood there speechless. She also didn't think anything of continually making suggestions as to what I should do with my front garden and would often create dramas like the time when I cut the Ivy off the fence on my side and she got upset about it.

It's entitled woman syndrome. We all know them: Women who think they are better than everyone else (often through sanctimonious idea that they are morally superior or more intelligent). She once had the gall to say, 'I'm used to getting everyone organised as I am a manager at work'. It was really hard for me not to stick my two fingers up at her! She was always righting the world as well. She had the answers to everything!

I really hate that type.

Yes, this was my first thought too.

Just know your speed and slow down!

I think it makes a change to read someone confronted a neighbour immediately.

She's obviously not a Mumsnetter or she would've been wringing her hands on a 350+ post thread before eventually putting a note through your door, in the dead of night 😂😂

I shouted at a bloke who was speeding the wrong way down a currently-one-way street due to roadworks today. We almost had a head on collision with my two young children in the car.

I don't care whether you're male or female. If you're putting lives at risk I'll tell you about it.

You should have at least an idea of how fast you were going!

maybe she was absolutely right to shout at you to slow down.

30mph is far too fast driving through a housing estate/street. 20mph is much more sensible and will lead to fewer serious accidents.

The secondary school in my nearest town is in an estate and people drive far too fast IMO, as it’s quite a long wide road from the traffic lights up to the school.

Do you drive forward into your space, OP, or reverse? I reverse in as I'm on a busy road, so I have to stop and check the pavement and cars coming up the road, then pull in - I feel it's much safer, and I can pull out safely too. Unfortunately, I see the ones that pull straight in, and they're always faster. Might it be time to acknowledge that you need to address what you're doing? I think it was a bit rude of your neighbour, but if she hadn't done that, there's a possibility that you'd continue doing what you're doing?

So how, fast do you drive? We have a 10 mile an hour speed limit and when asked most people say they strive the same speed which when we tested them with a speed gun was... 15mph. They all agreed to the speed gun test. Lots of very red faces when the police pointed out that 10 mph is the legal limit and they could all be fined.

@SurfBox YABU. There's no such things as abrasive or WRONG when it comes to calling out reckless drivers. Your neighbour was right to have a go at you.

She was clearly hacked off with the way you were driving, you probably do it all the time but this time she happened to be outside as you were doing it so shouted over.

Maybe just drive appropriate to the residential nature of the road regardless of the speed limit?

Maybe no kids but maybe there are cats.

I freely admit I don't know how fast I drive down our road.

Our estate has recently had a 20mph limit imposed - which made no difference to my driving because that's what my instructor taught me to do in 1997. So I know that when I approach our road I'm doing less than 20, and that I don't return to anywhere near 20 while navigating the bend, the multiple road-parked cars and the turn in to our drive.

My speed is well within the imposed limit, and is what I judge to be reasonable for the road and conditions. Knowing whether it's 9, 12 or 15 makes no difference to that.

She was rude but at least her shouting isn't likely to kill anyone. Just take it on the chin and slow down.

You should always be aware of your speed,

You would have got a yelled "slow down, dickhead" from me so I think her approach was fine. This is one situation where I think it needs to be pointed out immediately, not later on to save your embarrassment.