AIBU to consider the wife?

[straightoutofa]

I know a married man through dog-walking, and I am attracted to him. I also suspect he is not in a sexual relationship with his wife. I would never make a move on him. If he were to make a move on me, I would tell him that I am interested in him, but that he would have to be single for me to take it any further. AIBU?

I think...

Is it my husband? He seems very popular with the local dog walking ladies. They are always so disappointed when I walk the dog and not him.

Bottom line is all the time he's married I would never say anything. But I wouldn't say anything because he is married. Then I'm thinking - well, I don't owe her anything (from another thread) so why not? My morals and my logic aren't really saying the same thing.

Oh is this a TAAT designed to prove that the people on the other thread would change their tune when faced with an actual example?

I'm not changing my mind. You should say nothing to the man. Not because you have an obligation to his wife but because you have a general obligation not to be an arsehole.

🙄

Well, my dog walking friend (female) and I always say we are going dogging when we walk together.

because we are hilarious.

He's a creep.

Just wrote a long message about my experience with a separated man (told me he was separated after we'd started dating but probably a lie), was still married.

You shouldn't come on to him whether he's in a sexual relationship with his wife or not. A lot of couples including DM and stepdad are married but don't have sex anymore for various reasons.

God give me strength
He

Is

Married

That's it.....

Stop making up reasons why it's 'ok', his appalling behaviour does not give you the red light
Grow the fuck up

He sounds horribly familiar, does his first name begin with an A?

This is the sort of thing a guy on my regular dog walk would say, I found him really creepy. Sure enough, last year he left his wife and kids for a fellow dog walker who had apparently declared her love for him. Needless to say wife and kids were devastated, especially as the ow lived just around the corner. I always thought he was a slim ball.

Whether or not you believe you "owe" the wife anything, how would you respect yourself if you slept with a married man? It's a shitty thing to do, and more likely than not, you'll end up hurt, yourself. I'd avoid it out of self-preservation, if nothing else.

His comment comes across as a joke, btw. But even if it's true and he and his wife never so much as kiss, it's honestly none of your business. You need to find something else to think about.

Really? I mean, really? "Man walking dog makes sleazy joke" sounds sooooo familiar that you think you know who he is! No, you don't. These posts are so attention seeking it's hilarious.

Weirdest thread ever

Well if you're in a relationship yourself, why do you have to consider the wife and Mr Lover Lover's commitment? Why not consider your partner and your commitment?

That was a hell of a drip feed. You're thinking extremely logically and about your needs coming first. He is married and so you stay away and that's it. What you want doesn't come into it, he has a wife and he has a commitment to her and not you.

This is probably the sort of thing my husband would joke. We have sex, not as much as he'd like, but he'd like A LOT. He is happy with me and would never leave me just because he has slightly less sex than he'd ideally want.

Don't make a fool of yourself.

Does his 'witty banter' extend beyond dog related jokes?

This cannot be a serious post.

This made me laugh 😃

He's clearly looking for a genius to share his life...

😂 it's a joke. Men, and women, make off the cuff jokes like that all the time. Doesn't mean there is a vacancy! You seem to think you're a catch and that he needs a sex buddy. Grow up and get over yourself.

Then I'm thinking - well, I don't owe her anything
You have no obligation to her specifically but you owe it to yourself to be respectful and kind.

Aside from that... if you’re saying; ”I have a bit of a harmless, temporary crush on this guy I see on dog walks” then fine. If you’re saying; ”I’m beginning to be infatuated with him, would leave my DP for him and hope he leaves his wife for me” then you might need to re-evaluate things.

That's all? The dog licked is face and you assume his marriage is sexless. I don't lick my husbands face but my marriage is certainly not sexless 🙄

Do you tend to be unable to make decisions that take other people in the situation into account

FFS. You must be joking or very desperate.