Attempted upskirting by delivery man

[upskirting]

Bizarre and shocking experience today, thanks to a delivery man working for a large well known delivery firm acting on behalf of a major U.K. retailer.

He "had to tie his shoelaces" three times in the 5ish mins he and his male colleague were here. I was home alone. Each time he moved uncomfortably close to me and then knelt on the floor and put his phone camera-up on the floor next to him. I felt uncomfortable but couldn’t believe that he was trying anything.

The third time I was in an area like a utility room, and he'd knelt in front of the doorway, essentially blocking me in... and then said, oh sorry, i'm blocking you! He moved himself but not the phone, which I would have had to step over or close to over, to get past into the main room. Fortunately I had the good sense to stay where I was.

AIBU that this man should lose his job? As should his colleague, who clearly knew what was going on? And also, WWYD now, if you were me?

Yep! It was meant for @SurfBox
sorry!

This is horrendous. I think it’s only going to get worse given so many deliveries now & the scope for them to take advantage is now there. This whole thread has made me re-evaluate the whole issue for sure. Hope you reported this freak in question? Did it get you anywhere?

Reported it to the police. Didn’t hear anything back.
Phoned the take away and they said they’d sacked him not long after he’d delivered to me because he’d done it to multiple women.
I messaged the guy to say I’d reported him to the police and they were going to track his messages (a lie but it worked).

The police responded a month later to ask if I wanted “any further action”

@upskirting I worked at a large uk
wide company that delivers beds/furniture etc.

we know full well who is out on delivery. What van they are in. Whose deliveries they are doing. What order they are doing them in. Whose the person helping them in the van each day.

This is all pre-planned with specialist software and vans are loaded so they can be emptied in plan with the route and customer deliveries to make life easier.

Even if there are agency stuff used that day for your round - the company - if a large chain like oak furniture world / Argos or whatever - should absolutely 💯 be able to tell who was on that day doing your delivery.

keep it up. Explain in detail - write it down in teeny detail. The stepping towards you to tie his laces and making you boxed in a corner is a massive red flag. Any company worth their salt will want to investigate this. We took all such complaints about behaviour etc very seriously. Don’t let this drop until you’ve done as much as possible.

what a creep. :/ good luck with this.

The police got back to me today but won’t do much more unless I can get them a name or a vehicle registration number. Frustratingly they don’t typically contact the employer, in such a situation. Fortunately my neighbours have Ring doorbells… so I think we might be in luck!

Keep at it, OP. Someone who is willing to corner you IN YOUR OWN HOME and attempt to commit a sexual offence is not safe to be sent to make home deliveries. I’m furious at the feeble response of his employer. You’ve got all of us behind you.

Thank you! I’m all fired up. We’ve got them both on camera, but at quite a distance… and you can see the van drive past, but not the registration.

The most annoying thing is that we’re planning to install a Ring doorbell, but just hadn’t got round to it!

I would make a complaint about the police response. They have an obvious line of enquiry that they are much better placed to pursue than you are (the employer) about an attempted sexual crime that was an abuse of position and an invasion of your home. There is a clear risk that this is serial offender, a likelihood that it involved conspiracy and the potential for it to escalate to something even more serious.

How utterly bizarre

the purchase item company or the delivery company will know precisely who delivered the item.

indeed on your delivery note there might even be their names.

either way - this is very very straightforward to identify the names of who delivered

Too right.

it would be appalling if the police went straight to the employer.

they have to have sufficient grounds before they take the allegation wider than the person reporting the allegation and against whom they are reporting.

otherwise people’s employers, neighbours, friends and families would be pulled in to allegations that later are proved to be false.

God men are weird. Literally nothing surprises me anymore

ffs - what are they like...

But you're absolutely right. Scaring you is a win in its own right. Making you pay attention to them is a win.

@GrinAndVomit

what food delivery company?

presumably you went straight to the food delivery company in question. Ocado, Waitrose, sainsburys, Asda - they would have been so so I top of this- immediately. Especially as you had hard written evidence.

and you would have received a VERY tasty goodwill payment from them.

i complained about a cleaner in sainsburys that always leered at me as I walked around.i suggested they look at cctv footage gave them exact days and times.

i got a profuse apology and £100 goodwill

and I never ever saw him at the store ever again

It is a very real crime. It's an attempted sexual assault. My local force (Notts) would take this seriously.

I should have been more specific. It was a take away delivery driver.

Independent or chain?

Independent.
ok ok ok, I didn’t want to share this but… it was kebab shop.

The shammmmmeee.

No shame

the shame is all on him

I assume you’ve checked any text/email notifications you got for your delivery for a name.

But the police are being ridiculous, sex offenders like other criminals don’t tend to leave their names.

Do you have a crime number? If not insist on getting a crime number

I have no information regarding the names on the emails or texts, and they didn’t leave any paperwork. The police seemed helpful on the phone but none of the emails they’ve supposedly sent me have arrived… although I got the initial “thanks for reporting” email so the email address should be correct.

The company will know precisely which employee delivered this item of the delivery is an internal delivery method ie employees of the company

if they outsourced then also very very straightforward to establish who delivered.

you need to determine if internal or outsourced delivery company. If the former, very straightforward. Less so if the latter bit also straightforward

That is absolute bollocks. A victims complaint is sufficient grounds to investigate. Including contacting employers or others in order to identify the suspect. Our already sad conviction rates would be through the floor if the police needed independent corroboration before they could even investigate a crime. FFS.

Exactly this.
Also, it may not be the first time he's been reported for something similar but even if it is, and the police aren't keen to do anything this time it could help them build up a clearer picture if someone else were to subsequently report a similar incident.
Thank goodness you're sensible and realised what was happening... I wonder how many other people he's tried this with.
Hope you're ok

The thing is in this scenario, the man in question wasn’t just doing it to perve (he’s unlikely to get much of a shot of someone stepping over a phone) - if it was purely for that reason then there’s easy accessible porn online. He purposefully gets off on violating women in their own homes and the thrill of doing it without them knowing - it’s like a power thing and he us using his job to facilitate this. This sort of behaviour is quite disturbing and definitely should be reported.

I think some men get a big thrill in being part of an online community of men who post pornography made without the knowledge of the women concerned.