Would you be put off by a man who doesn't drive?

[ItDoesMyHeadIn]

I was. Cancelled the date. I'm being too fussy apparently. To be fair my friend is married to a man who doesn't drive and he's amazing. Neither of my parents drive. The guy I was going to date could afford it, he just can't be arsed. He is happy to walk everywhere or use public transport. Up to him. But I would want to be with someone who can literally take the wheel sometimes. Like fuck do I want to be the one driving 8 hours up to Scotland for a holiday, or being the one to always collect the takeaway etc. I'm pretty traditional and sometimes I admit I would want my man to pick me up and take me out for dinner etc (fuck off crazy feminists, yes I can take myself out for dinner). I didn't actually realise how much of a deal breaker this was until it was put in front of me! Interested in opinions...

It's no wonder so many women end up with dickheads if being a driver is a pre-requisite.Heaven's forbid we judge someone on their personality.

So many either/ors. It's astounding. Have a driver OR a worthy, supportive partner. Is it so vanishingly rare for someone to have managed to find both in one person?

Of all the threads I've seen on here about dickhead partners, driving or not driving rarely seems to be the issue. However, if you're in the all-too-familiar scenario of a lazy twat doing nothing for your home or family life, I can only imagine how much that would be exacerbated if you were also the sole driver.

Just wondering how all the non-drivers (who depend on trains to get to work,) are coping with the train strike?

Being a bit nicer to their driver friends and acquaintances I would imagine.

I didnt know there was a strike.
Im nice to everybody anyway.

I cycled to work today. It’s a beautiful day. Enjoy your sweaty metal box.

@PurpleButterflyWings

do you think that everyone who gets the train to work is a non driver?

Pretty much everyone who gets the train to work in my office is a driver, they use the train for a number of reasons, no parking at the office, one car families and the other person has the car, its too far to drive and train is quicker.
They wont be getting into work via car either

… air conditioning.

This is getting cringeworthy.

We’re in central London, everyone is able to get into the office this week just fine, in my floor alone we have people from Leeds, Grantham, Peterborough and Birmingham

If I was in work today I would have cycled. Like I always do. I certainly wouldn't be sitting in traffic jams (I hear that it's gridlock today) watching the MPG figure descend ever further south, while petrol is £2 per litre.

Depends where you live. In London that'd be very petty dealbreaker, unless you had grand visions of moving out in the near future.

Would that be the air con that increases your fuel consumption by 10%? Enjoy your fuel bills.

All the drivers can't get into the office anyway. We work in central London. Even my boss who has a parking space in central London. He said it costs him £80 to drive to work excluding parking due to congestion charge/petrol. Train is cheaper. And takes a shorter time...so he is WFH.

Most people who live in the home counties can drive. But shock horror they sell season tickets to London. Why I wonder? Cos no one I know with a car drives regularly to work in London!

I once tried taking a taxi to my work in London, it was the biggest noob mistake ever..we were stuck in a traffic jam that was so dreadful that we abandoned ship halfway and ran to the train. You cannot drive into central London during rush hour. Sorry but you have no concept of what it is like to work in central London (which is also where 1/4 of our tax revenue is generated).

What’s cringeworthy about not wanting to destroy the planet and pay through the nose for the privilege? People who have alternatives to using a car in using alternatives shocker.

@RockStarMartini , yes!

I do know someone who can drive, but doesn’t, but ‘I don’t drive’ usually means ‘I can’t’ so why can’t they just say so?

I used to know someone - friend of a friend - who ‘didn’t’ drive - she had 6 children and used to sit serenely at home with a glass of wine while sundry friends ferried her kids as well as their own, to and from their various activities in the SW London rush hour.

As my friend said, ‘She’s the clever one - we’re the mugs!’

It wasn’t a question of money, either - big house, very affluent.

I drive but bloody hell, there are some really ucking obnoxious drivers on this thread.

Fortunately I have enough money not to worry about the fuel I use.

Calling cars “sweaty” sounds like something a child would come out with. I have never sat in my car sweating.

Amazingly enough I am also capable of riding a bike and I own one, but the more pleasant option is driving so I generally choose to do that.

I have the choice, it isn’t one or the other!

According to TomTom traffic is up 30% on yesterday with a 30 minute drive taking an hour so I don't think anyones a winner here

This is a really weird post. If not driving is a dealbreaker for a future partner then A) the reason behind it is irrelevant, you still have a prospective partner who can't drive and B) using pulic transport is far less lazy than just hopping in a car.

Are you…offended on behalf of your car that I’ve called it sweaty? They’re inanimate objects, I haven’t hurt their feelings. Until the air conditioning kicks in (at a cost - you may have enough money for fuel prices not to be a concern but that’s quite a privileged position as you well know) then a car on a hot day will be hot. What’s childish is the poster I was responding to gleefully rubbing their hands in anticipation of non-drivers being fucked over by train strikes. I don’t hate drivers, I don’t want them to be subject to inconvenience or £2 a litre diesel prices. Why the hatred for non-drivers?

For the hard of thinking and those with a lack of comprehension skills who are saying 'I ride a BIKE to work!' I am talking about people who HAVE to get a train. It's laughable and ludicrous to assume everyone can cycle to work. Many work too far a distance to do that, and for many, the route would be treacherous.

But you crack on trying to convince yourselves that it's better to not drive, and spend half your free time on hot and sweaty public transport (if it's actually running and not on strike!) and I will get in my lovely luxurious air conditioned car, and get to my destination in a third of the time than most of you would get there on public transport.

In addition, the petrol may be high priced at the moment, but it's STILL cheaper to run a car than it is to pay EXTORIONATE public transport fares! Plus more convenient, always there when you want it, gets you there much quicker, gives you more freedom, makes you less dependent on others, and lets you down WAAAAAY less than sodding public transport., (the train strike is a case in point!!!)

And PMSL at the 'enjoy your sweaty tin box' comments. There's no car in the world that's as sweaty and hot and stuffy as a bus or train! (and don't even get me STARTED on the underground!!! that's like a fucking sauna.) I know people suffering 40 degrees C last week on the underground, whilst I was comfortable in my 17 degrees C air conditioned car.

As @iBrows stated, pretty much all cars have air conditioning now, so the 'sweaty tin box' comment just illustrates how badly educated some non-drivers are. Then again, this IS coming from the type of person who thinks if you can drive, that you are incapable of riding a bike, getting a bus or train, or booking a flight on a place somewhere. PMSL! You couldn't make it up! Does ANYBODY really think this in real life????! Coz I don't know anyone who does!!!

Still angry I see, and still deriding other people as “uneducated” despite your completely inability to use punctuation and capitalisation appropriately.

If cars are so cool, comfortable and inexpensive why do people get so angry in traffic? Surely you’d relish the chance to spend a bit longer in such pleasant surroundings each day for the bargain price of just £1.80 a litre (on a good day).

You haven’t answered the question of why you’re so delighted and gleeful at people being potentially inconvenienced by rail strikes? Do you really hate non-drivers so much? Why?

As a fellow car driver I beg you: please shut the fuck up. You're making us all look like deranged morons.

Well considering that cars can’t sweat, I clearly read it as intended - you were childishly calling drivers sweaty to insinuate that they are somehow less comfortable than you when they travel.

I would definitely sweat a lot more trying to cycle a long distance on a hot day.

Cars are convenient, that’s why they exist.

This thread is mental.

Childish, uneducated, keep them coming.

I agree wholeheartedly with your final sentence. This thread is insane. In the real world I’ve never experienced this level of criticism for being a non-driver - people just don’t care.

My husband doesn't drive. He's blind in one eye. He's also got a very senior corporate job, is very handsome and the kindest person I know. So, I make do! It's not an issue for us. If I don't feel like driving we get a taxi.

I do know someone who can drive, but doesn’t, but ‘I don’t drive’ usually means ‘I can’t’ so why can’t they just say so?

Because in almost every context it’s not relevant, apart from to satisfy your own nosiness?

In my experience any time someone has asked “ah but CAN you drive or not?”, they aren’t happy with “I can’t” either - they also want to know why you can’t and whether or not they consider your reason acceptable. And not everybody wants to discuss their own medical conditions or financial circumstances with every random who asks.

(FYI I don’t drive because I can’t drive, and I can’t drive because of medical reasons which mean the DVLA won’t let me.)