To feel sad for Prince Harry

[OldManRivers]

Have been looking at the photos today of Harry in the car being driven from the airport in America back to his home. He looks so sad. It must be very difficult for him to attend a huge family occasion like that with his role drastically changed, and to see all of his family but now he's on the sidelines popping in so very sporadically.

Also I can't help but think he must feel sad to think his children won't grow up around their cousins, and extended family. Meghan doesn't have any family except her mother so they don't have any in America either.

Originally he and Meghan wanted to carry on being part of the royal machine and do appearances etc but also have some independence so it's not as though this life was their original plan, where it seems like they're sidelined and alienated. AIBU to think regardless of what's gone on it must be very hard for him to be in another country, away from his ailing grandmother who he is very close to, and feel like a bit of an outcast?

This. It is only a matter of time before they divorce. Not an if, but when. Then we'll have more interviews by Harry, like Diana before him, talking about the inside of his marriage.

If he felt sidelined, it's because of their netflix program. No one wants to be filmed /discussed in it. So I'd say most of the royal family avoided their trip. Wonder if this is why we didn't see their kids. Maybe they will be in the netflix version of it as the royal family was totally against their cameras etc

"the wearing of a racist brooch in her presence"
Grow up little snowflake

Yes because if racism bothers you, you must be a snowflake!

I think the thing about cousins for these kids are that they will 'get' the weird reality that is being royal.

I think that's why William and Harry are close to their cousins. They all get it and they can trust them to respect what is private family and what is public performance.

The Cambridge children have each other and their cousins from the Philips and Tindels so it's not like they are missing out.

Archie and Lilibet might feel it BUT in America it's easier for them to just be and not be royal. By the time their adults this could all be ancient history for them.

I'm sad at the way it has turned out, as I feel that Harry with his military experience is the best member of the Royal Family to maintain, keep and support the traditional support for the armed forces that they can represent.

They are very lucky that they were invited to join in the celebrations. What with all the worries of driving licences and passports been hidden away by the Queen and her lot 🙄

Most people don't go on tv with one of America's biggest chat show host's ever in order to bring them down.
I know other Royals have done exclusive interviews and been a bit critical of certain aspects of their life and so on ( also in books too) but what they did last year was unforgivable and you could argue that maybe William is protecting his own wife by standing by her too and going very low contact ( I know he isn't perfect either though !)
They are probably worried that anything that is said may be used against them or worried about the new book that's coming out or just maybe fed up with him completely. He has been difficult long before Meghan and it wasn't all because he lost his mum aged 13.

And to be honest I really hope the pair of the stick it out as a couple - given the way they have treated his family on leaving ‘the firm’ can you imagine the media circus the pair of them would create & orchestrate if they split? He’ll know that too, he’s going to be stuck whether he wishes to be or not.

I don't think we can have any idea that the cousins won't know each other growing up. I grew up on the other side of the world from my cousins in the 80s and 90s when travel was a LOT longer and more expensive, we didn't have social media, and yet we are close. My parents made it an absolute priority that we all got together every summer and now we have whatsapp groups and instagram for all the cousins to stay connected between in-person get togethers.

DH grew up a 2 hour's drive down the motorway from his cousins (who are the same age as him) and I don't think has spoken to them ever, his parents just didn't make it a priority in the same way that mine did.

It isn't a life I'd want to lead - I felt very sorry for Kate over the weekend having to manage young children in such a public arena. Their lives are like goldfish bowls and they're judged over everything. So I get that Harry wanted out and a different life for his wife and kids.

I just don't know why he felt the need to burn the bridge he walked over. I don't think there is any coming back from that awful Oprah interview. I had sympathy and understanding for him up until that point, as I think most people did.

I feel very sorry for his children that won't get to know their extended family. He's denying their birthrights, and I hope that in future years that they are grateful for that.

They wanted to be part of the royal family on their terms, which meant the nice bits (wedding, major events) but not of the boring things (charity meetings, conforming to royal standards, like deferring to Kate and william). Mostly of course from Meghan. You can't be half in and half out.

Harry can't have dealings with Meghans family because she has alienated all of them, and has managed to alientate all of Harry's blood family.

Made his bed and has to lie in it. I'm glad they had a minor role and went back to America where I hope they have a happy life, along the lines they chose.

I reckon Andrew feels sadder!

He is from a family who is all about having close ties to each other but has chosen to marry someone who comes from a completely different background and who isn't close to her family members.

It's the opposite.

Meghan is extremely close to her mother and her large group of old school/uni friends who are like a family to her. The fact she has such a genuine and close relationship with her mother, and the fact she's maintained such close and loving relationships with her friends for so many years, shows how important those ties are to her.

The BRF are not a family, they are a firm. They aren't close at all. As a family they are utterly toxic and all about the business and loyalty to The Firm over anything personal, and protecting the Monarch and heirs comes first.

Prince Charles's book completely slagged off the Queen saying she was a terrible mother. Charles is at war with both his brothers, and conducted a media smear campaign against the mother of his children. They all leak nasty stories about each other all the time (the fact William rewarded Jason Knauf by making him CEO of the Cambridge Foundation after how badly Knauf fucked up his job as Thomas Markle's press handler, the scandal of him hiring someone with faked credentials who was fired for gross misconduct then immediately landed a live-in position to a Tory donor whose sister is a Daily Mail reporter, and of course the leaked emails proving that Knauf was leaking info about Royals to the press, is very obviously dodgy. Anyone who thinks William wasn't behind the Harry and Meghan smear campaign and actively leaking nasty stories about his brother, I have a bridge to sell you). The poor Cambridge children are being pimped out at every turn, and already you can see how the press is pushing personas on all the children where George is the perfect mature one, George is the difficult one, and Charlotte is the feisty one. Within ten-fifteen years we'll start seeing truly nasty articles about Louis and inappropriate articles about Charlotte's body and dating life (all designed to prop up George) I'd bet money on it.

Hell they can't even see their own children on Christmas Day because there are so many mandatory costume changes and activities, remember the years of outrage in the press over the Middletons "rival court" (before Meghan joined and suddenly Kate became the "woman who has never put a foot wrong). Even Kate couldn't hack the regimented Christmases and had to escape on alternate years.

Horrible, toxic excuse for a family.

No I dont feel sad for him. Its a shame if his new life doesn't live up to expectations. He said he was miserable as a royal. But its like getting a new job and leaving a job that had good points but you don't realisd it until you've left and then its probably too late to go back. If he hadn't done all the trashing of his family on TV he probably could go back. Now not sure if he could. Maybe he doesn't even want to.

He got exactly what he asked for. What’s to be sad about? No 40yo man with the privilege he has merits my sympathy. He’s a free man, nothing but choice available to him.

Loads of people don’t grow up close to their cousins. My siblings and I all live in different cities so our kids are growing up apart; just as our parents lived in different cities from their siblings and we grew up apart from our cousins. House prices being what they are plenty of people move away from family.

We have no idea if Harry is sad, or full of regret, or wondering if MM was worth it. We could just as easily examine a shot of him smiling in California and interpret it as “he’s thrilled to have escaped, has no regrets and is happy his kids are growing up with rescue chickens in the sunshine, away from the weird in-bred royal kids”.

Was being back in the thick of the royal pageantry after all the public airing of dirty laundry, and no longer a working royal, weird and uncomfortable for him? No idea. Equally it could have been “This is fun, I know the rules cos I was once part of it, so I’m not uncomfortable, but I’m glad not to be tied to it. Nice to see Granny and introduce her to my kid but can’t wait to get back to Cali”. No idea.

The only thing I feel sorry for the royals and other famouses about is that people project all these feelings and motivations onto them. Now THAT’S weird.

Just a correction to pp’s post: It wasn’t the Duchess of Kent who wore said brooch! Katharine (who is married to the Duke of Kent, the Queen’s cousin) is a lovely woman who shouldn’t be tarred with that awful brush...

Indeed. This is the man who sold the most woeful self-pity fest to the media about how the British people didn't love or venerate him to the level he felt he deserved, and criticizing his own parents and their parenting methods openly to the media. It's all to the tune of 'poor, misunderstood little me'. Sounds familiar.

Not forgetting that this particular daughter-in-law didn't always qualify for his favour. When he felt that her parents were being put above him in the grandparenting hierarchy, there was more whining and self-pity emanating from his direction then, too.

We've read about these kinds of parents often enough on this very forum. Someone always has to be in favour. By the same token, someone is always out of it, and when they are, he'll make the grand gesture of acceptance toward the ones currently in his good books, just to show his displeasure to the others.

It's all about him. To receive his favour it seems people have to kowtow to his every whim, otherwise they'll hear all about how dreadful the world is to him and how hard-done-to he is.

It seems both his sons have inherited some of these traits. They're not attractive. No wonder Camilla reportedly lives under a different roof.

I wouldn't waste too much time on one photo, and a post-flight one at that; even on a private jet it's called long haul for a reason

Then again I wouldn't waste time feeling sorry for him either; he's made his choices and while his behaviour doesn't say "happiness" to me I hope I'm wrong and that everything's rosy over in SoCal

I don't pretend to know why they bothered coming all that way for a brief service, though of course we don't know what was going on behind the scenes, but as said yesterday I still believe the RF would have been wise to wait to see what the book contains before rolling out any public red carpets. For all we know this might have been made clear to him, but at least we were spared any attention-grabbing silliness over the Jubilee

You can't be half in and half out.

Except most of them ARE half in half out. There's no reason they couldn't have had the same deal as the York sisters or any of the others, who enjoy royal status, live in royal properties, are welcome at events, but are also free to work and use their royal titles for commercial and financial gain. If Peter Philips is allowed to film TV commercials in set made to look like Buckingham Palace, with a fake royal crest, explicitly saying, "I as a member of the British Royal Family endorse this brand of milk" then there's absolutely zero reason why Harry and Meghan shouldn't be allowed to work.

I think its a shame when siblings fall out .However none of us know the details although DM etc keep telling us they know all there is to know! Harry is happy in the US with his wife and young family.He would be excused for a pang of nostalgia for his old life of course .His great Uncle did similar and may/may not have regretted it .He always looked happy in the photos of him and Wallis Simpson .The Queen Mother always felt that her husband ,who had to step up had a raw deal as he was very shy.At least Wills has had a lifetime to be in training for the top job!