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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to bring dog in supermarket

324 replies

Name2change · 28/05/2022 00:18

I have name changed as I know that most people will be inclined to think that this is ridiculous proposition as its societally unacceptable. I know the cognizant is not to bring them in because they could get out and get into things and cause damage or irritate people with allergens or for hygiene reasons etc etc but surely this applies to dogs who are on leads and being held and not ones in enclosed baby-looking prams that cant get out or get close enough to people to irritate them. I honestly don't see the issue with well behaved dogs who cant bother anyone especially when no one will even know they are there. I saw someone in the supermarket who'd done this a while ago, they bothered no one and ever since I've been thinking that this is something id like to do as I have a hidden disability that is made just that bit more comfortable with my dog just being there but I haven't done it as I'm too ashamed and would be anxious the whole time about being found out! I dont want any "YABU for getting her a pram", its a separate issue, she requires one and I'm not getting into a debate about it. AIBU to go for it or should I leave it well alone and forget about it?

OP posts:
WindyKnickers · 29/05/2022 05:40

Lol. Not angry at all. Mostly just annoyed (and venting) that I can't step out of my house without someone's dog approaching me and wanting to protect the vanishingly few dog-free spaces that still exist.

NumberTheory · 29/05/2022 05:46

How much worse is it if you don't take your dog into the supermarket? What assistance is a dog in a pram providing and are there really no alternatives?

I've never been bothered by a dog in a pram but I can see why supermarkets might not want to allow them in en mass, which they would basically be doing if they said it was okay for anyone who said they had a special need for one to do so.

So if you can get away with it, that's on you and I wouldn't complain or point it out to the supermarket if I spotted you and it didn't encroach on me. But I won't add my weight to any sort of pressure to encourage supermarkets to relax their rules. I strongly doubt it's more inclusive overall.

NumberTheory · 29/05/2022 05:50

Blarting · 29/05/2022 05:24

Wow, that's a LOT of anger.

I quite like the proliferation of dogs. But there are a lot of bad owners and so a lot of poorly behaved dogs around now compared with a couple of years ago. If my kids were younger and still scared of them, or if I had an allergy or some other reason to want to avoid them, I think I might be a bit angry about it too.

mycatisannoying · 29/05/2022 05:51

YABU, and I say that as a dog owner and lover.
Can't you order a supermarket food delivery from home?

theobligatorynamechange · 29/05/2022 06:58

I like dogs, but I have severe allergies. I don't find it easy sharing my space with guide dogs, as much as I respect and like them. Labradors are lovely, but they're not exactly short-haired and I can always smell them - but they are extremely well-behaved working dogs and trained to focus on their owner, which helps. There's no chance they would approach me, jump on me or lick me. Guide dogs are very uninterested in people who aren't their owner unless those people are doing something to endanger their owner.

Given the number of seeing dogs out there, it's rare I'm in an enclosed space with more than one guide dog, so usually I move away and I only have a mild reaction rather than a serious one. It does makes me ill, and there are consequences that last well after the dog and I part company, but it's a mild level of discomfort.

Sometimes when you have people with competing disabilities, you have to weigh up who is in greater need. It's safer for me to have mildly impaired breathing and days of itching afterwards than it is for someone who cannot see to have no help on a busy tube carriage where people are constantly getting on and off every few minutes and overcrowding there.

People randomly bringing their pets into the supermarket? I don't see how their need trumps mine. Service animals need to be specific breeds, trained up by people who know what they're doing, and used only where there is an absolute need. Severe allergies are actually considered a disability - something many people don't realise - because they have a profound impact on our lives.

There is a difference in how we react when one dog is nearby, compared to many dogs nearby, especially depending on the breed and how much they shed. A dog in an enclosed pram might not trigger a reaction in someone, but it might in another. You can't assume sticking a dog in a pram is OK.

If you are anxious about going into a supermarket, you have options other than bringing in a pet. There are mindfulness techniques, for example - coping techniques you can and should explore through counselling. You haven't explained why having a dog in a pram makes you more able to manage your disability, but as a dog in a pram is not going to be of any practical physical assistance to you, I can only assume it is for a mental impairment or neuro-difference, and whilst I'm not downplaying the importance of mental health, there are other solutions than dogs.

A blind person has much fewer options - what, you want them to rely on getting a human to accompany them each time? They're entitled to their independence. Guide dogs may cause some problems for some people, but they enhance the quality of life for visually impaired people so much and are in some ways, an extension of them.

Someone with severe allergies - what are they supposed to do if surrounded by a variety of animals? It's not as simple as taking drugs. You can't stave off an allergic reaction with a shed load of antihistamines, and frankly, why should anyone be forced to medicate due to someone else's behaviour? Having to put up with guide dogs is a reasonable compromise. Having to put up with other animals is less so.

The adjustment for a mental impairment or neuro-difference (a random animal) cannot trump the adjustment for a physical condition where the person can die (not being surrounded by animals in a supermarket). You have one animal - you are opening the floodgates for others.

I'm sorry, OP, but I think you are being massively unreasonable here.

BertieQueen · 29/05/2022 07:23

Nik2015 · 29/05/2022 01:40

For some reason people who have dogs believe that all people love dogs. This is not the case….

I find the same with people who have cats…

Scianel · 29/05/2022 07:33

In Italy people take their dogs into supermarkets.

StepAwayFromGoogling · 29/05/2022 07:43

YABU. I love dogs but they should be nowhere near supermarkets unless they are genuine support animals. My MIL is horribly alergic to dogs - her throat contracts and she can't breathe. She's able to avoid the vanishingly-rare guide dogs in a supermarket but would really struggle if they were everywhere.

Oysterbabe · 29/05/2022 07:51

Yabu. I don't want dogs in the shop where I buy food. Maybe you will control yours, but once you make that a possibility you won't be able to move for disgusting mutts licking the bread rolls.

toastedbagiel · 29/05/2022 08:07

Scianel · 29/05/2022 07:33

In Italy people take their dogs into supermarkets.

That's the answer then OP, move to Italy.

RampantIvy · 29/05/2022 08:38

Well said @theobligatorynamechange

Vallmo47 · 29/05/2022 08:54

My son is terrified of dogs. My friend is severely allergic. If the supermarket bends the rules for you to bring a dog into supermarket, others will request the same and we will get an increased amount of dogs wearing “support” tags. I just don’t think it’s fair or right we have to accept animals in indoor environments, except for guide dogs. I’ve managed to train my son to walk around guide dogs, because they behave in a certain way that he feels safe. OP it’s YABU from me. If you can’t cope in a shop without your support dog, try to bring someone you know who can act as a support to you.

melj1213 · 29/05/2022 10:21

Another point is that why should supermarket staff have to deal with your animals? What if staff members have allergies or phobias of animals, why should they have to change their job or quit because customers can't leave their dog at home or in the car while they buy their bread and milk?

I work in a supermarket, I do not want to have to deal with your animals all over the shop - its bad enough when there's a gaggle of unattended children milling around aisles, getting in the way of workers etc, we do not need to add animals to the mix as well.

One of my colleagues was attacked by a dog as a child and has lasting large scars on one of her arms, face, neck and chest. She also, understandably, has a huge phobia of dogs. If dogs were allowed in store then she would not be able to continue with her job as her role involves her being on the shop floor and around customers. She also has lasting nerve damage in her arm that means she isn't suitable for any of the warehouse/back of house roles and even if she was on a checkout/behind the service desk she could have to encounter dogs (and then be stuck without a way to escape from the situation) so what is she supposed to do? She's damn good at her job but if we allowed animals into the store she would not be able to do her job.

pigsDOfly · 29/05/2022 12:59

Having seen a number of dogs lift their legs and pee on the merchandise - usually large bags of dog food - in pet shops I'd really rather not have someone's dog peeing on stuff I'm likely to buy.

Your dog may be house trained and not pee in your house but put a dog (particularly male dogs) into a different environment with a great many interesting smells and the chances are he will lift his leg and mark everywhere.

Assistance dogs take a long time to train, the average dog isn't trained well enough to take the chance that they won't mark.

Name2change · 29/05/2022 17:28

As stated in the OP, my dog would be in an enclosed pram so unable to touch let alone wee on anything, leave hair anywhere or cause reactions to people with allergies. It looks like a baby pram and no one would know that she was even there. She isn't trained but that isn't an issue because she wouldn't be able to get out, its a pram built for dogs and she would be attached inside to the leash. have a hidden disability - autism, and my dog just being there makes me feel that bit more comfortable on days that I feel like I cant manage. I'm allowed to adult too. Ill ask the manager next time.

OP posts:
whowhatwerewhy · 29/05/2022 17:54

worraliberty
Well if being found out makes you anxious, it's not going to make your life easier is it?

Fair point! But if other people accept me in doing this then I imagine I wouldn't be so anxious. That's why I've posted this to be sure

Not many people think it's a good idea, but your no longer anxious and will ask the manager 🤔

Trixiefirecracker · 29/05/2022 18:44

Dogs in bloody prams. Whatever next.

riesenrad · 29/05/2022 19:01

I just don’t think it’s fair or right we have to accept animals in indoor environments, except for guide dogs

I totally agree. Not just supermarkets but also offices etc.

TheCanyon · 29/05/2022 19:10

Aquafizzle · 28/05/2022 05:09

Don't be ridiculous. Dogs don't pee in shops.. I've never witnessed that and the OP is talking about carrying hers in an enjoyed dog carrier bag. Calm the hell down.

How odd. Our of the 7 guide dog pups that we trained, I'm pretty sure every single one of them had a pee accident within a shop.

pigsDOfly · 29/05/2022 19:20

Don't be ridiculous. Dogs don't pee in shops.

Oh yes they do.

As I said in my pp upthread I've seen loads of dogs pee on the lower shelves when I've been in Pets at Home with my dog.

My dog did in fact pee on the floor there when she was a puppy but unlike a lot of their customers I did tell one of the shop assistance and asked them if they would like me to clean it up myself.

The person I spoke to was fine about it and said 'not to worry, it happens all the time' and no they didn't expect me to clean it up.

Womeninblack · 29/05/2022 19:39

@Name2change I took my dog on a long weekend trip to London and it was so practical to have. She went in when she got tired from all the walking we did. Great to use in the underground and awesome to take into shops. We and she loved it and so many people stopped to say how adorable she looked ☺️
The dog is fully enclosed in the pram people, get over yourselves!

Zwellers · 29/05/2022 19:45

So you want to cause a possible breach of hygiene, stop anyone that's allergic to dogs using the supermarket.and issue and are cruel to the dog on top. Winner. Just use home delivery.

undermilkjug · 29/05/2022 19:48

Name2change · 29/05/2022 17:28

As stated in the OP, my dog would be in an enclosed pram so unable to touch let alone wee on anything, leave hair anywhere or cause reactions to people with allergies. It looks like a baby pram and no one would know that she was even there. She isn't trained but that isn't an issue because she wouldn't be able to get out, its a pram built for dogs and she would be attached inside to the leash. have a hidden disability - autism, and my dog just being there makes me feel that bit more comfortable on days that I feel like I cant manage. I'm allowed to adult too. Ill ask the manager next time.

Wouldn't you be more comfortable just doing home delivery and not using the supermarket at all?

theobligatorynamechange · 30/05/2022 12:55

Name2change · 29/05/2022 17:28

As stated in the OP, my dog would be in an enclosed pram so unable to touch let alone wee on anything, leave hair anywhere or cause reactions to people with allergies. It looks like a baby pram and no one would know that she was even there. She isn't trained but that isn't an issue because she wouldn't be able to get out, its a pram built for dogs and she would be attached inside to the leash. have a hidden disability - autism, and my dog just being there makes me feel that bit more comfortable on days that I feel like I cant manage. I'm allowed to adult too. Ill ask the manager next time.

I have a hidden disability too - an allergy to animal hair - and dogs not being there make my throat not close up.

You feeling that bit more comfortable makes me feel that bit more dead. You're just not talking about one dog - as soon as supermarkets allow your one non-service dog into the shop, they have to allow everyone else's. Can you not see how this would have a severe impact on those of us with allergies?

Service dogs are specially bred and trained to have a minimal impact on the people around them. Your dog, you have admitted, is not one of those dogs.

PinkScrunchie · 30/05/2022 15:49

Name2change · 29/05/2022 17:28

As stated in the OP, my dog would be in an enclosed pram so unable to touch let alone wee on anything, leave hair anywhere or cause reactions to people with allergies. It looks like a baby pram and no one would know that she was even there. She isn't trained but that isn't an issue because she wouldn't be able to get out, its a pram built for dogs and she would be attached inside to the leash. have a hidden disability - autism, and my dog just being there makes me feel that bit more comfortable on days that I feel like I cant manage. I'm allowed to adult too. Ill ask the manager next time.

Legally you have an emotional support dog NOT an assistance dog and legally the store are allowed to refuse you entry. (iwhich I hope they do). If they do refuse you entry don’t get arsey about it.