Best passive aggressive/petty moments..

[LittleMissUnreasonable]

The other day I was trying to park in one of those private run car parks where there are no designated spaces. There was only one quite awkward space left and there was another car behind me who was practically sat on my tail trying to get this awkward spot. I decided to reverse out and find another car park but this tailgating car was not letting me go go as they were so hell-bent on getting this space and were trying to go around me. I just thought screw it and drove into the spot as I had nowhere to go. You could practically see the red mist coming from the driver's ears as they had to reverse and find another car park 😤

Another consistent one is that we have a manager who will without fail walk up to a small group of colleagues with a query and direct it to the men, completely ignoring the women. So now, even if I know the answer and the male colleague doesn't, I will just get on with my work and not intervene. It's funny to see the manager flapping around trying to work out the answer when he could have just asked...you know...a woman😱

I was returning a pair of shoes unworn with all tags on for a smaller size to the same manager who served me the day before when I bought them! on way over to shop I must have dropped the receipt, their small sign indicated no exchanges or refunds without a receipt, I pleaded with them that all I wanted to do was exchange for smaller, clearly unworn etc, you served me yesterday etc jumped up hoity toity manager refused so I left, went back to car and found receipt in passenger foot well, I went back into the shop and indicated to be jumped up manager that I had found the receipt, she changed tack and was all simpering and smiles (quite expensive shoes) called her assistant over to please go and get me the smaller size. “Oh no I’m not having an exchange thank you I’ll have a refund instead and will use my money in the shop down the road (Russell and Bromley) who have a more sensible exchange policy, she got all flustered and annoyed but I got my refund And left ! Never to shop there again!

I knew as soon as I read your comment about dodgy Australian police it'd be Brisbane pre- Fitzgerald. 😄

@nancynoname 🤣🤣🤣

Lol. I had something similar.

Having been a qualified and practicing counsellor for some years I went to uni for the first time aged 50 to study for an MSc in Psyshotherapy. Within the therapy world some psychotherapists see counsellors as well meaning but amateur do-gooders. In my third year I had the head of course as my supervisor and in seminars and case discussions he would often patronisingly refer to my interpretations and interventions as 'touchy-feely' or 'woolly' counselling talk.

When I submitted my first essay of the year (a pyschodynamic analysis of ongoing work with a client) he was one of two tutors who blind-marked it. I got a staggeringly high grade of 84%. (First and only time I did that well but I ended up with a very respectable course average of 69%). When we eventually met to discuss my progress he was visibly stunned to discover it was me who had written this exceptional piece of work (and to be fair I was pretty stunned too). He sat at his desk shaking his head and muttering 'but this shows true insight ....... a deep understanding of Kleinian theory...... positive use of counter transference...' etc etc. I sat there smugly and drank my coffee resisting the urge to shout "in your face you Freudian bastard!'

Happy days!

Her lecturer told her it was near impossible to achieve a 1st, presumably with the implication that she would be unable to come close. Then said lecturer gave her a strong 1st in her next assignment, thus eating their words

thank you; that’s how I understood it too, I just don’t understand how submitting a decent piece of work is PA or petty…it also shows the lecturer in a good light because, despite her comments, she has then fairly awarded the correct grade of a 1st. There’s no need to feel smug about the lecturer! I don’t think her comment was rude either, a 1st is tricky

Indicatrice

not mumsnet behaviour… stop bullying and give it a rest. Your 1st response was fine, rest are just not needed. It’s forum not a playground

@Hearwego

i wouldn’t begrudge teenagers joining the queue with their friends at the front. Usually due to small children I send DH to queue for things then join him with the children when he’s near the front. It’s just saving a space in line 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Fraaahnces

Outstanding story

Inspired by the shitting on the drive story…

My cats. Cat1 - aggressive and a bit stroppy. Male cat, neutered but still a bit territorial /aggressive.

Cat2 - abandoned in a bin as a newborn, a bit weird, probably attachment issues according to the vet 😀.

Cat1 has the run of the house and garden, Cat2 took a shine to a box used for groceries, so we made it comfy for her with a cushion and blanket. It was her sanctuary.

Cat1 climbed in there, looked at her directly and pissed in it.

actually, that’s probably just aggressive, not passive aggressive

Some people seem to have misunderstood passive aggressive calling someone a 'see you next Tuesday'' is aggressive. So is telling is a snooty sales rep to Fuck off. Where is the 'passive' in punching someone in the face.

But it is a shit response from a lecturer.

If any student came to me and asked, 'How do I upgrade from 2:1 to a 1st I'd admire their work ethic and tell them. I'd certainly not say, 'Ooh bit hard, love' or words to that effect. Not to a solid 2.1 student. Even is a student scraping a 3rd asked how to reach a 1st I'd suggest a stepped programme of improvement to upgrade to 2:2 then 2:1 and on. Never talk your students down from aiming high. That is really bad teaching imo. Insufferably patronising.

100% correct.

I have had students who were predicted a 3 in an exam (scale of 0-9 in 0.5 increments). A couple of them came to me and asked how they could get 4 or 4.5 which they needed to continue with their studies.

I told them it would be very, very difficult to reach that level by the end of the term but if they did x, y and z they had a chance for 4.

They were awesome and got 4.5!

I really wish I had told them to aim for 5 instead.

Ok, and…?

Where’s the rest of the story?

What is “fumming”?! If you are going to have a go at other people’s so called inaccuracies then at least keep your spelling and grammar correct!😂

Oh my god will you guys knock it off!!

This!! Everyone complaining about or at Indicatrice really is just as bad and petty!

Our bathroom shower is broken at the moment so we have to use the en-suite. DP was pissing me off and I knew he needed to shower as he was going out in 20mins. I had food poisoning and was doing the most foul smelling diarrhoea known to man, I decided to use the en-suite instead of the family bathroom and left the window closed after to keep the smell in.

Gross but a small victory.

Had a passive aggressive colleague who never answered a question when asked but would come over later and give the answer when colleagues had moved in to other things. Reorganising in the company took place and she was the first to be made redundant.
Maybe your behaviours are noticed and will have an impact on your ability to keep your job!

My in-laws are lovely but barking mad. FIL has a habit of getting in a sulk for the weirdest reasons. Years ago DS - who was a huge Harry Potter fan at the time - informed his grandparents that they are both in Hufflepuff. For some strange reason they were both extremely offended and informed DS tetchily that “we are in Ravenclaw!”. It was such a daft thing to be offended by that for the past several years, if FIL is in a sulk about something I serve him his coffee in a Hufflepuff mug. He doesn’t seem to notice but I find it childishly amusing.

@DaveGrohlsMrs - ‘fumming’ is a MN in-joke. Way back in the mists of time, when it was all fields round here, someone misspelled fuming as fumming, and it was taken up by other posters.

Sweet!

<chef's kiss>

My in laws have done this a couple of times and I bloody hate it.

A quick text would suffice, but no.

Last time, i was eating my dinner and basically couldn't finish it cos they came over unannounced, because they 'were passing' (I have a weird thing about eating in front of people).
So that was it for the meatballs.

I didn't understand it either

Ah - but hardly passive aggression

I was blahing on at a gathering after perhaps one too many drinks. A complete stranger butted in and said, “You’ve just contradicted yourself.” The whole room went silent. I stared, and a quote from a chapter heading in my current reading popped up. In my mind.“ Evidently you’re not familiar with Plato’s theory on contradiction.” I said. She shut up and the next time she saw me fawned on me. I should mention I know nothing about Plato.