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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not want to go on holiday ever again

376 replies

noborisno · 08/05/2022 16:47

Anyone else just not bothered about going on holiday and would rather be home?

Just wondering if how many others feel the same way. I'm just not bothered and even find it a hassle. I could not care less if I was never to go abroad again in my life. I do like weekends away but anything longer I just want to be home again.

OP posts:
Mrsmch123 · 08/05/2022 20:39

I love holidays. They don't have to be full of culture. It's nice to sit in the sun, drink cocktails and relax. Well as much as you can with a baby in tow🙈 Don't find them stressful at all. Make a list, pack your stuff and go🤷🏻‍♀️

Blossomtoes · 08/05/2022 20:44

You’re so, so wrong. This post is coming halfway through a Mediterranean holiday. It’s so amazing to be somewhere completely different where the last two years feels like a bad dream. The sun on your face, fabulous food, a glass of wine at lunchtime, feeling the stress drain away. It’s beyond wonderful.

MumbleCrumbs · 08/05/2022 20:45

I hate traveling too, went to New York a few years ago for free and thought I'd love it, but due to my anxiety (and fear of flying) I just hated it and couldn't wait to come home! Having said that I feel lots of guilt I can't afford foreign holidays with the D.C when all of their friends are jetting off. The best we can do is Scarborough with their grandparents.

Threebutterflies · 08/05/2022 20:51

I find going abroad very stressful and a lot of hard work . While we’re there and before and after. I’m a single mum and don’t like flying. The last time we went half board and I still ended up doing loads of cleaning tidying and washing up (there was a little kitchen in the apartment/room. I’m happy my kids enjoyed it so it’s worth it as I want them to travel and be confident. But wish they would help more !

lameasahorse · 08/05/2022 20:51

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resuwen · 08/05/2022 20:52

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This is all absolutely true. It's a hell of a lot of work. Still love it though. 🤷🏽‍♀️

womanchild · 08/05/2022 20:58

I don't want to travel the world or go to certain parts of it... But I absolutely want to experience some special abroad trips in Europe & Canada. Also, go on lots of mini UK cheap holidays mainly camping. I always need a holiday planned to look forward to. Never travelling again would be so insular, small and depressing

Chaoslatte · 08/05/2022 20:59

smallbirdwidesky · 08/05/2022 18:40

I’ve never been to Majorca in my life! But I wouldn’t dream of saying I had anything other than the thinnest glimpse of another culture from going on holiday. There’s something I find quite patronizing to other cultures to pretend you get more than that from your hols.

I suppose if you had a very narrow life experience and knew very little about how life is lived in other parts of the world, going to a non- western culture may feel ‘eye opening’, but that’s more a statement of the life lived before that, than the value of holidays as a cultural learning experience in overall.

You seem to be saying both that you can’t understand a culture without spending significant time there, and also that if you gain any understanding from a visit then you’ve got a narrow life. I’m not sure how you square those arguments. What do you deem non-narrow life experience that doesn’t involve experiencing how other people live?

LuckySantangelo35 · 08/05/2022 21:00

When I was on about swimming with dolphins I meant the wild swimming, NOT Orlando sea world style swimming with dolphins BTW

wonderstuff · 08/05/2022 21:04

Each to their own. I love to travel, I love a journey. I find the weather in the UK very depressing for most of the year. Kids favourite holiday is Cardigan Bay, but I drag them over to Florida or down to the south of France because I love the sun, they enjoy it when we get there.

ICannotRememberAThing · 08/05/2022 21:06

Same here OP.

I’m planning short breaks in the U.K. this summer.

I totally understand people wanting to get away though. I think if I lived in an apartment in a city for example, I’d want to travel and go on holiday. People like a change of scene.

TellySavalashairbrush · 08/05/2022 21:08

I’ve realised in my late 40s that I dislike holidays in the UK. The hotels are generally not as good as those in europe , the weather unpredictable and they always seem to cost much more than a week abroad.
when dc was little a UK trip was easier so I get why families plump for them, but don’t want to do all that ever again. Still, different strokes for different folks.

Chaoslatte · 08/05/2022 21:10

EileenGC · 08/05/2022 19:59

I just don’t understand why people have to dress up their holiday as some massive educational and cultural experience. It’s not. You get a very, very superficial glimpse. You really don’t ‘get’ the culture from you two weeks hols.

I have moved countries several times and I completely agree with this, it’s spot on.

You do get a glimpse of the culture and yes, it opens your eyes in a way (especially if they were closed before you left home…). But to be completely honest, every time I have moved it has taken me 12-18 months to start understanding what the local culture and customs are actually about.

If you don’t speak the language (fluently, B2/C1 level), if you don’t live with locals for extended periods of time, if you don’t try to navigate council admin / healthcare / jobs and schools in a country, you’re not really experiencing that culture.

I had holidayed in every single country I’ve moved to. It’s still always been a shock, a few months in. It’s nothing like a holiday and all your expectations go fast when you realise that you thought yourself an expert on the country but in reality know nothing.

I’d still encourage people to travel and explore every single country and culture they can, but let’s be really careful with calling ourselves ‘cultured’ after a hike up to Cusco, 2 weeks in Phuket or even a complete museum tour of Madrid. There’s a long way between doing those things and learning the culture.

My experience has been different to this - I found the trips I made to the other countries I have lived in (and yes where I speak the languages to C2 level and integrated myself), I learnt a significant amount very rapidly, and then once I moved there it was more a slow burn of the minor quirks and in-jokes from the last few decades of tv… but the fundamentals of the culture I got in a matter of weeks. But only from trying to, which of course not everyone does whilst on holiday if that’s not their thing.

LarGoo · 08/05/2022 21:12

I love being at home, but my greatest pleasure in life is travel. Seeing new places, meeting people with different perspectives, experiencing different cultures (food, architecture, history, society). If I could afford not to work I would spend half my time travelling.

I sometimes find the first couple of days in a new place a bit stressful (I’m instinctively worry about earthquakes in Japan, or illness in India) but it takes me out of my comfort zone and ai learn so much. Travel is my biggest expenditure apart from mortgage/ bills.

But everyone’s different… for me it broadens my mind and feeds my soul. That saying, I don’t have children so can book independent travel and accommodation and please myself and DH, so likely less stressful than those with kids.

TheOGCCL · 08/05/2022 21:17

I am not a fan of sun/beach holidays but do like city sightseeing. I know what you mean, I am not really bothered about going away. I enjoy my day to day life and have no real yearning for a break and it comes with a lot of hassle. However, I think maybe it is good to push yourself sometimes, otherwise your world becomes very small.

UggyPow · 08/05/2022 21:20

lanbro · 08/05/2022 17:00

Love going abroad, I don't find it stressful and it's getting easier now restrictions are lifting. I have my own business and find that I can only really switch off when I'm out of the country

I am the same, self employed, physical job & if I am home I am working, also work from home. I have a SEND child so always seeing to their needs - holiday can be planned around his needs & get to take my mum away as well. She gets some quality time with & I get to read in the sun & then we swap - what’s not to love?
But firmly believe a holiday is about what relaxes you or it is not a holiday

MissAmbrosia · 08/05/2022 21:20

I love travelling - though I don't much like flying. I'm very much one for bunging everything in the car and going on a weekend away or a road trip or 2 or 3 weeks self catering somewhere else. I don't really do hotels or AI type trips as it doesn't appeal. I don't like being in 1 room for 2 weeks or having to be at breakfast by a certain time. Having somewhere with all mod cons (including washing machine) in a different location where there are markets and different food and maybe a beach and things to see - marvellous. AI on a resort with hundred of others is my idea of hell. A holiday is what you make it really.

reluctantbrit · 08/05/2022 21:21

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I think it seems you are doing too much beforehand and don't push others to do their bit.

Work - yes, it's a bit busier to ensure handover is done, I still manage to do this in my normal hours, I tell my colleagues that I need to focus on this and ask them to let me in peace for an hour or two.

Why is washing and cleaning the house so much more? I tell everyone that the last wash is on this date and if it is not in the basket or worn afterwards, tough luck. I clean as normal, the only thing left is empting all bins by DH, his job, not mine.

We have a box in the living room roughtly 2 weeks prior to departure where all non-clothing stuff is being collected, books, games, spare toileteries, medication not in daily use etc, no running around collecting from various locations when packing happens. The only things needed packing the night before are chargers and electronics. DH is in charge of packing, DD and I just dump our clothes on the bed and let him get along. Over the years DD learned to pack herself, yes, we had to buy hairbrush or a pack of knickers but she learned quick. Obviously when she was younger we went through her things together and I kept a closer look on what she wore when.

We pay for a cab instead of taking the car now to the airport, before that we paid for valet parking. Costs were part of the holiday budget and often not a lot less than the cab.

DD had always some new thing for the plane, often bought when on offer long beforehand and she was allowed one thing at the airport, often a magazine I normally refused to buy. Ipad with downloaded movies and headphones ensured she was happy and DH and I could read in peace. Again - holiday treat.

Hbh17 · 08/05/2022 21:24

Goodness me, no. I love travel, & really missed it in the pandemic. A cottage in the UK, no matter how lovely, is just not the same. I think of my favourite places - Rome, South Africa, Sri Lanka, Vienna, St Petersburg, German lakes.... and many more - and can't imagine a life without seeing them.

whoruntheworldgirls · 08/05/2022 21:27

Absolutely love going abroad. UK holidays no, too many things to pack to cover all weather eventualities, same for toys

Wrongkindofovercoat · 08/05/2022 21:28

The absolute best part of going on holiday for me is getting to sleep in an actual bed, it might be a single or the bottom bunk, buts its a bed designated just for me and it beats the sofa with the dog hands down !

userxx · 08/05/2022 21:29

Hell no, I love exploring new places and feeling the sun on my back. I find holidays in the uk more hassle as you have to be prepared for our erratic weather.

Mrsmch123 · 08/05/2022 21:30

@lameasahorse surely you do most of that on a day to day basis anyway..
its hardly stressful printing of documents, booking parking, driving a car....
no clue why people get so stressed going through an airport. Check in, security and jobs a good un🤷🏻‍♀️

LarGoo · 08/05/2022 21:33

@Chaoslatte I agree! Even if an experience is “superficial glimpse” it’s real and be hugely impactful. You don’t have to live like a native to benefit from travel. I spent 2 years working in India, but short 2 week breaks have expanded my horizons just as much. Travel isn’t about trying to be a local - it’s about being open to new experiences, embracing difference, broadening your own horizons and enjoying life!

Some people don’t want to travel, and that’s fine. Life is about working out what makes you tick - if you don’t like travelling that’s great, do something else.

Abouttimemum · 08/05/2022 21:33

I live for holidays. I love living in the UK and enjoy trips here etc but it just doesn’t cut it for me entirely. And when I’m at home I just think of all the things I need to do. Love a little sunshine break (and a siesta)