Should the Deputy Head have been allowed to do this?

[SandwhichGenerationGal]

DD has four year old twins. They attend nursery school 09.00-3.15.
Twin 1 was sent home early with a temperature. DD kept her off the next day and she developed diarrhoea. I was visiting but needed to leave at 2pm to go to work (I am a nurse). Suggested she call school and ask to collect twin 2 at 2pm so I could stay at home with twin 1 and new baby (I don’t drive and school half hour walk). DD rang school (gave reasons for wanting to collect early) and was told deputy head would need to give permission and would call back. She didn’t call so DD phoned again and was told she was in a meeting. DD then drove to the school and asked to collect twin 2. Was informed deputy head had refused permission. Suggested their dad could collect her at the normal time or she could go to after school club, (has never been before and doesn’t even know what it is). DD said neither option was acceptable. DSIL is a doctor and can’t just leave at a moments notice (of course he would if it was emergency) and twin 2 was unprepared for attending after school club for the first time). Deputy head refused point blank and DD had to come home. I ended up staying and was late for work.
When did schools become so obsessed with their attendance stats that they take priority over the child’s health and well being?
They are four FFS and not even legally required to be in school.
Was the deputy head within her rights to refuse this or is she just a power mad controlling jobsworth? DD didn’t even get into the school, it was all done over the intercom. I am livid.

Deputy he’s is right. There’s no need for the second twin to go home early. Twin should be in school not missing out because sibling is unwell.

That’s absolutely crazy, they cannot refuse to let you take your own child home for any reason. I would be ringing ofsted or the local authority about this if it is as you say as that is not legal.

Deputy head sounds like a jobsworth. They are only four. I think I would have insisted on taking the child home.

Deputy head is unreasonable, especially as the child is 4.

Deputy head is an arsehole.

BUT parents need to stop asking permission, but TELLING people like this what will be happening with their own child who is not yet of legal school age.

That's utterly ridiculous! I speak as a teacher. Our school would never refuse that perfectly reasonable request - I've known it happen many a time & it's never even had to be approved by the Deputy Head! How can a mum collect 1 child when she has a sick child at home who she can't leave or bring with her because of the very real risk of a toilet accident. They're 4 for God's sake & 2pm pick up is only about 1hr early...for 1 day...in an emergency. Awful attitude of the school. Just difficult for the sake of it.

Deputy head is out of order.

Deputy head sounds pathetic

Deputy head was very unreasonable - I say this as an experienced teacher as well as a mum

DD didn’t even get into the school, it was all done over the intercom. I am livid.

I don’t blame you.

Also, they can try and fine your dd for unauthorised attendance or whatever (that would still be unreasonable) but literally preventing her from physically taking her child away is tantamount to kidnapping/unlawful detention and I'd be sending some strongly worded emails. School is not a prison

In fairness to the deputy head missing an hour and 15 mins of school can cause serious problems with future university applications.

What a jobsworth!

Where does the school get off thinking it had the authority to refuse this? Ignoring the fact that they are 4 (so below the legal attendance age) a perfectly reasonable request like this?

Next time I'd suggest telling rather than asking

Twin 2 had no reason to leave early though? What was your dd reason other than her difficulty in picking the twin 2 up later? It makes zero sense from a school pov why twin 2 needed to leave early. With siblings of different ages, it wouldn't be allowed either because there is no reason to.

You said nursery school?
So not even Reception?

If that's the case I don't the the Deputy head has any right to refuse

Of course it would be, I’ve picked up my ds earlier because ds1 had Hospital appointment.

head teacher is awful, and you should make a complaint

She had to collect her early because she had childcare for the ill twin at 2. Otherwise she would have had to take the ill twin with her.

@LibrariesGiveUsPower · 06/05/2022 17:16
Deputy he’s is right. There’s no need for the second twin to go home early. Twin should be in school not missing out because sibling is unwell.

I wonder if you missed reading the all reasons why the 2nd twin did need to go home early?

Deputy head was being an arsehole. There was no reason at all why your DD could not have collected her child, who after all is only four anyway.

There was a reason. So she could be collected without taking a sick child to the school. It makes far less sense for a nurse to miss the beginning of her shift letting down colleagues and patients. What would you have done, marjau?

No school can legally refuse to let you take your child off the premises, they can only refuse to mark it down as an "authorised absence". You can take your child out of school whenever you want without reason (not to say you should) and they cannot prevent you from doing so.

Sounds like a reasonable enough request to me, given that one child had diarrhoea and so a school run to collect the other could have been a bit of an issue if your daughter had to do it alone with nobody to look after the poorly child.

@ MarJau26 - Did you not read what I said or are you just spoiling for an argument. Twin 1 had a temperature and diarrhoea. She could not leave the house for fear of having an accident. I could stay with her until 2pm. There was every reason for twin 2 to be collected early.

Deputy Head sounds like a power crazed idiot. Complain.
Hope your DGD feels better soon.

That is insane. Completely unreasonable of school. Not sure if they are allowed or not, they shouldn't be though.

Why are you stating the reason and then asking the reason?

Bizarre!