To ask why having an elective C-Section is so frowned upon?

[Rosesandbutterflys]

I am (hopefully) having an elective C-Section soon. First baby, don't want anymore children after.

I've always had a fear of child birth, which over the past 5 years has been compounded by a lot of people around me having children and the vast majority of these (though I appreciate I'm probably unlucky here) have been pretty traumatic births that have ended in severe tears, forceps and a lot of the time, an emergency section anyway. Granted their experiences have mostly been better on their second birth/ child.

Nothing and I truly mean nothing about natural childbirth/ labour appeals to me. Not the hours of pain, pushing, potential rips/ tears, forcep intervention, epidural (yes I appreciate I'd have one of these for a section), damage of my pelvic floor and the panic and stress of potentially having to be rushed to theatre because it just wasn't going to happen naturally and the baby is in distress or whatever.

Now don't get me wrong, nothing about a c-section appeals to me either, it's absolutely no walk in the park and I'm dreading it, but it has to come out some way and I am a person that likes to plan things and to somewhat be in control/ aware of the plan. I have also had abdominal surgery before (though not as severe as a C-section) and I know recovery is likely to be painful and slower than if I were to have a natural birth. But for me, this is the preferred/ lesser of the 2 evils option.

I have also spent hours pouring over research as to the benefits of a vaginal birth over a c-section and last night came across a NICE/ NHS study/ research that found that actually, for a planned/ elective c-section, the risk to the mother of a c-section compared to a vaginal birth is pretty much the same. It states that the risk of the baby ending up in NICU with a C-section is 13.9% compared to a vaginal birth which is 6.3%, so double the risk, BUT it says the research does not take into account the fact that most c-sections undertaken are for medical reasons and therefore the likelihood of the baby needing NICU attention after it's born is increased anyway.

It then went on to say that the risks of an unplanned, emergency C-Section are a lot higher than a natural birth/ elective/ planned C-Section. So I guess if each woman was guaranteed to have a straightforward, natural birth, then great, but a lot of women do end up needing an emergency c-section so, technically they are more at risk than someone who has chosen an elective.

This now seems like I am bashing natural delivery and I'm not at all I totally admire and respect women that chose that route, I only wish I were that brave.

However, the responses I have had from people my whole pregnancy when I have admitted I am opting for an elective C-section have been ridiculous. Not one person has responded positively, all I've had is 'Oh, really? Are you sure??' and 'Oh, why on earth would you elect to have that?' etc etc. Or just a stony faced, tight smile and 'oh right' making it clear they disapprove but not actually coming out and saying it.

I got told last night that the reason I'm getting these reactions is because a C-section is 'taking the easy way out '😕

If that's the case, why on earth wouldn't you? Why is it that it seems the prerequisite to being a good mother is seemingly having to martyr yourself all the time?

So many of my friends that have had children and also the women in my NCT class who are preparing for their births have all expressed dismay/ distress at having to have any pain relief, they all want it to be as natural as possible and I know my friends that haven't had 'textbook' births still harbour 'guilt' and sadness to this day. Why? If you need gas and air or an epidural, so what? What exactly am I missing? If they ended/end up with forceps or an emergency section, it's not their fault, it's just one of those things. Surely modern medicine has provided these things to make childbirth safer?

Anyway, gone off on a tangent now but if you disapprove of someone having an elective c-section, could you tell me why?

I've done both. If I could choose again I'd have liked to have both as an Elective CS instead of just dd2. I had a horrible birth experience with dd1. It didn't go well and has caused a bit of damage to me and I worry it's mildly affected dd1.

I think this predates the NCT indoctrination...To the woman he said, 'I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.' It's not selfish, the NHS is always on it's knees so let's all stop having kids. No, it's a political choice to underfund the NHS and in particular maternity services.

I think it would be a positive step if we could stop using normal and natural in reference to a vaginal delivery. I think most (not all) would choose an uncomplicated vaginal delivery over a c section but most don't get an uncomplicated vaginal delivery, especially if it's a first birth (from a hastily googled Australian study of over 5,000 women).

It's an intrusive question and I wouldn't answer. "I don't know (+/- you're kinda overstepping the mark here)" is always the appropriate response to the endless parenting (mothering) judgements that start now and never end.

So you’re opting for it because it’s seen as the easier of the two options but then argue it’s not easier.
I don’t care how anyone has their baby or how they feed them but I will say the fears of others do have a knock on effect and that’s the issue I have. Making women scared, compounding issues of breastfeeding which ultimately give more money to the formula companies.

I live in a country where c-sections are the norm and I really had to convince my obstetrician that I wanted a natural birth for my first baby. The second time around I agreed to an elective c-section. If I was to ever have a third (I'm not) then I would definitely choose another c-section. It felt very orgnised and calm compared to my experience of a natural birth and the recovery time (for me) was much quicker. I had to be induced for my first and ended up tearing. Childbirth isn't a competition, if a c-section is what you want I'd say go for it.

All medical interventions have side effects so not having a medical intervention is better, but you are right if you need it as an emergency anyway thats much riskier!
I wonder if some of the negativity is because there's a perception those who choose c sections are 'too posh to push'.
I'd be temped to have a c section if I had another, my first was vaginal birth and I just had a small tear and so it was a relatively good birth. C section is a major surgery and no joke but it feels like you can plan for it better at least. It is worth remembering after c section you can't pick up anything heavy or drive for ages so it will limit what you do for weeks after birth so you need a good support system

14 weeks pregnant here and in the nicest possible way I couldn't care less how other women choose to labour, feed, sleep etc. As long as you and your child are healthy and safe, more power to you and your choices

A textbook natural birth is way preferable to a c-section imo.

I had a natural birth with dc1, went very smoothly, it hurt but didn’t seem that bad, small tear, home within hours, went for walk the next day, recovered very well after about a month. Long walks very soon after. No long term pain.

DC2 was c-section. 3 nights in hospital, intensely painful recovery. Couldn’t walk for months. I’m still in pain 6 years later. They cut right through your abdominal muscles and you’ve no guarantee you’ll get the tone back. Most the ladies I know who’ve struggled after have had c-sections.

the reality is there’s risks both ways, unknowns both ways, and both hurt. My goodness the c-section hurt so much more for me though.

I'm not against women choosing the birth they want but some will definitely go into it not realising that it's not necessarily easier than a natural birth. I had an emergency c section with my first after being in labour for almost 2 days, then had three elective sections after that for medical reasons related to my first birth. The recovery with all of them has been OK but with each c section it definitely got harder and my body has been put under a lot of strain. I was told after my third if I had anymore babies it could damage my bladder and bowel as I had a lot of internal scar tissue that can attach to your inner organs and cause problems. After my fourth section I had a catheter for 3 days and was told I may need it long term. ( I didn't). I went on to have a fourth and luckily I was fine but I definitely wouldn't put myself through it again so I am sterilised.

Are we the same person?

I would only ever have an elective . A lot of my friends want the same or have had elective only .

All my doctor friends had electives .

People are brainwashed to be pro natural ;) cost saving

THIS. Absolutely!

(I had a planned C Sec on the advice of my consultant as baby was standing breech & the last one they'd tried to turn (in a very small rural hosp) had ended in disaster)

My NCT group leader told me 'how disappointed she was that I'd been cheated of a 'real birth'. I told her that after multiple misc, IVF & a difficult pg I was delighted my child was born healthy & safely. As it turned out, I went into labour a week earlier, but it then stopped & my baby became distressed as the cord was around his neck twice & his oxygen dropped like a stone.

My 2nd child, everyone said: 'oh, will you do it 'properly' this time / 'you get a 2nd chance to 'be a real Mother'. FFS. She was born by elective section on Consultants advice as she was (very!) Transverse lie so no real choice there.

Go for an elective if it is what is best for you. Good luck for a Good Birth x

There’s still this Biblical thing that giving birth needs to involve suffering and that somehow that’s something women need to face. You’ll just have to grow a thicker skin about people’s comments and find a polite way to tell them to mind their own business. Something like a deep frown and “that’s very personal information, my birth and healthcare information is private”.
It’s incredible that female reproduction is still seen as public business and we can be quizzed by any stranger. I’m sure men don’t get strangers and casual acquaintances asking “well Jim, I see you don’t have kids yet, have you had your sperm checked or maybe you have erectile dysfunction?” Or “when are you getting a vasectomy?”

I worked in the City when pregnant with dd1 and the other women there thought you were mad if you didn’t have c section / max pain relief. Remember one senior woman eye rolling that “you don’t get a medal” if you give birth the “natural” NCT way. So may be the circles you move in!

My theory is they suffered so they think everyone should suffer. It's bizarre. Enjoy your c-section! I certainly enjoyed my two.

Hello,

Here is the guardian article which summarises the findings www.theguardian.com/politics/reality-check-with-polly-curtis/2011/nov/23/health

And here are the individual link to the NICE statistics docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1qVMCyKyORDd1Eri-kg4jtQVrZ0fQhwllM0Cz6Y2bPhQ/edit#gid=0

• After my third, I had the catheter. Fourth section went smoothly.

emergency CS with 1st after 2 day labour and failure to progress. even though it wasn't ideal, would take the CS over those 2 days anyday
planned CS with 2nd lovely and relaxing, music in the operating room, up and about the next day, pain reduced by day 3 much better experience.
You don't get a medal for how you give birth and no one can look at your offspring and guess which had a natural vs surgical birth.
Stop worrying about what other people think. you do what's good for you. I wouldn't even give them the chance to pass an opinion, just don't discuss your birth plan with them

When I attended my final nct class with the baby as she was early after a hellish labour then emergency c section the teacher contacted me beforehand to ask me not to tell the others!

I was relieved to have the 1st 'decision' taken out of my hands as I'd been quite scared of natural birth.
2nd time I wanted a VBAC as I had a toddler to deal with & c-sec recovery is no picnic in those circs. But, 'Life' had other ideas :)

This. I completely disagree with elective c sections on the nhs. No one likes the thought of giving birth, that’s part and parcel of having a baby though. I don’t get how it should even be an option to choose to have extremely expensive, major surgery to remove a baby when the pregnancy and birth is expected to go fine.

I was induced with dd and ended up with intervention with a ventouse. It was all fine in the end but it wasn’t a great experience. I wish I’d taken more notice of the success rates for inductions in my age group because it was highly unlikely that I was going to give birth without assistance but they didn’t half bloody try! I should have pushed for a c-section when they started muttering about inductions. As it is I ended up in theatre with a consultant and anaesthetist anyway in case the ventouse didn’t work. From my point of view the whole thing could have been lot less distressing if I’d just gone for a planned section.

Other than prenatal care I’ve never come across anyone who thinks anything negative about c-sections.

I've got 3 dc My first two were forceps which resulted it a prolapse. dc 3 planned otherwise and came a few weeks early and very quickly ( he was fine) funny enough it was easy and quick but i still would've preferred a csection! just bear in mind that babies sometimes have there own birth plan lol

I had two elective sections for medical reasons and I have absolutely no idea why a vaginal birth would be a preferred option.

Maternity care is pretty shit these days and I can understand why a woman would opt to have a planned and controlled c-section rather than take the risk of having a vaginal birth with many possible complications in an understaffed maternity unit with poor standards of care.

Ah yes, I had ‘too posh to push’ and ‘you haven’t really gone through labour and delivered a child have you?’ (I had done both previously).

How you bring your child in to the world is up to you, and you are going to need to stop listening to others unwanted opinions and letting them into your head, because it only gets worse when the baby is here and everyone has some ‘helpful’ advice.

I had to have a section with my first as I had placenta previa

with my second I chose to have ELCS. Yes I could have had a natural birth but I didn’t want to for many reasons. I too got a lot of comments from people but I just ignored them

caesarean by no means is the easy way out. It’s major surgery that you’ve then to recover from whilst looking after a newborn baby!

so when choosing medical care we should be selfless? What utter bollocks.

we pay for the nhs and have a right to the births we are comfortable with. It is after all a terrifying and dangerous prospect. I feel same as OP anyway. Vaginal birth sounds like a con.

when I had gallstones I was told they’d just take the gallbladder out. Controlling it with diet would have been cheaper and saved the anaesthetist the bother. But they said surgery was in my best interests so I had it.