To not want to watch adult BILs play football

[Olive180]

DP (36) is from a big football family, and two of his younger brothers play in the same local team (just a bog standard Sunday league). It's their end of season tournament or something next Sunday and DP is going to watch with MIL, FIL, two sets of grandparents, and the partners of both BILs. I dont want to spend a sunny Sunday of my weekend watching random men run around a field. DP isn't usually one for couple 'obligations' but seems really disappointed I feel this way, and is sad that I don't want to go on this family day out, which is apparently a tradition for them.

Aibu? If DP was playing I'd happily go and watch, but he's not!

Can you go for some of the time?

Yanbu but could you go on the understanding you’ll go for a nice Sunday dinner afterwards?

It won’t take all day, only a couple of hours max.

Ps. I like his family and brothers a lot and we all get on great. I just don't fancy it!

Not a hope in hell. Waste a Sunday, let alone a bank holiday Sunday on that?

If your DH is going make sure he is fully aware of the great days out you are organising for yourself.

His family traditions are his to choose to keep, not yours to be commanded to.

2 hours for a family tradition isn’t really asking a lot is it? What would you be doing if you didn’t go?

you could go for a nice lunch after - in a pub garden if the sun is shining😉

Suggested this but his family are super tight (they're wealthy, not strapped for cash) and don't do meals out except for big birthdays. They'll probably take a sausage roll each to eat while they watch and that will be their meal for the day.

God no, definitely not unreasonable to do something else. If you're nearby, you could always drop by for the last 15 mins?

Can you go and see it as an opportunity to catch up/socialise rather than focus on the watching football part?

It's a couple of hours for something that's important to your DH.

If you'd be OK with him refusing to do similar for you, fine, but I'd give the time to a once a year tradition for people I care about.

Reasonable to say no now, and have no objection to others going.

YANBU, and even more so after the update that you won't all be doing something afterwards.
I'd be totally blunt about it, but then I didn't go and watch when the dcs were playing in matches unless I had to take them - and then often sat in the car.

With your sausage roll update, I’d be inclined to agree with you. Who wouldn’t want to go for a lovely Sunday lunch afterwards!?!

YABU and I hate football but it doesn't seem like much to ask if you don't have anything else planned. If they were expecting you to come to every match then yes, but it's one game that will last, what, 2 hours max. You'll be standing in the sun chatting to people you like, what else would you prefer to be doing on a "sunny bank holiday?" If you'd be happy sitting with them chatting on the beach/their garden/in a pub what's the different to doing so adjacent to a football pitch?
Make DH drive and take a nice chilled mini bottle of wine or g&t can to drink while you're watching. If the family are too tight to go for a meal after book one for just you and DH.

Not a chance in hell would I go and watch my bill’s play football, I couldn’t think of anything more boring.

id rather have a day to myself or a day out with friends having lunch and a few drinks.

You can't suck it up for one day, for the end of season tournament? Really? That's so much to ask? If your husband expected you to go every weekend, even two weekends a month, I'd tell him to job on. But for a one off game you can't manage it?

*jog on, obviously

It's a one off, a family tradition. Give and take

Hell no I would rather saw my own leg off!!

I've voted that YANBU, because I was answering your title thread, and, if you don't particularly want to, that isn't unreasonable.

However it sounds like this is more about a day out / family tradition, at which you will spend time with your wider family, so, in the absence of a back story of not liking your in-laws, then why not look on it as just a family get together?
I wouldn't particularly cancel or re-arrange anything else, but if you aren't doing something, then I think I would go.

My (adult) ds's Sunday league team are in a final this year. The supporters usually number between 4 and 8, but, for the final, everyone is bringing 5 - 8 people EACH. It is about the occasion and acknowledging that it is a special game for them.
Another adult dc plays in a rugby tournament each Summer. I'm not a rugby fan, but it is nice to go along and show support. There is a bar, and I'm happy to sit in the sunshine for a few hours to show my support, even though watching a rugby game isn't something I would do without the family connection.

I love the opera. I go 3-4 times a year with a couple of friends and it’s a treat for us all. Would I spend a bank holiday weekend listening to my SIL warbling in the village hall? No bloody way! Why is this scenario any different? Why would you fancy it? Even if you were a football fan more generally?

It's a family thing. Elsewhere in this forum there's a post from someone whose MIL doesn't consider her to be family. Doing stuff like this is what makes you family.

Joining in a family tradition goes a long way. It clearly means something to your DH that you go, and your involvement sends a good message to your in-laws.

It's only two hours and it'll make people happy. At some point there might be something similar that you'd like your DH to be part of, despite his macho of enthusiasm.

It could be worse. It could be a middle of winter match. Or an all day thing.

Honestly as a football fan I'd probably stand and watch kids kick a ball around the village green, but I love every level of the sport

His LACK of enthusiasm, even!

Nah, not for me either. I'd be happy on my own at home in my own garden.

I wouldnt go either. I hate such environment, too crowded, too noisy etc.