To basically demand super-flexible working hours

[Flatbrokefornow]

I am very privileged in that I don’t have to work to pay the bills (although only just, and not for much longer at the rate things are increasing!), but less privileged in that I’m widowed with no family close by. I’m completely on my own.

Now my DD is in secondary school, I’d like to think about going back to work, to fund a few treats and get my pension and DD’s education fund back on track, and also for my own fulfilment.

BUT, I won’t consider working school holidays. I know people do, and all power to them, but it won’t work for us, yet. (My DD has been diagnosed with anxiety, is being assessed for ADHD and has also lost her father. She’s got enough to cope with) We’ve tried holiday clubs in the past, and the effects on her anxiety are just not worth it for our family. She’s just 11, and while she (probably) won’t set fire to the house, and I’m happy to leave her for short periods occasionally, I can’t really just expect her to stay home alone all day everyday. There really isn’t anyone I can ask. Lone parenting makes forming friendships difficult, I’m an only child and my parents live abroad. I have lovely neighbours, who will do the odd favour, but that’s not exactly a solid plan going forward.

is it a non starter? I was thinking of retraining, but given the restrictions I can work, I’m not sure it’s worth bothering. Who’s going to want to employ me? Especially if any of the interview panel are blokes who never even think about childcare (and it’s common, let’s face it) and just think I’m either coddling her, or a spoilt princess that wants holidays off. I have considered working in a school, but in all honestly I don’t think I could spend all day managing children’s behaviour and then come home and manage DD (who can be very rigid and oppositional) with the level of patience I’d need and enough energy to hold boundaries with her. I don’t think that would be fair on her, or sustainable for me.

I’m currently looking at careers with flex time, working from home, or short term/part time contracts. I wouldn’t mind buying extra leave, or taking a pay cut, but my family will come first and I would leave a position which didn’t allow or follow through on me not working school holidays (in the main. The odd day will probably be doable) without hesitation. Is this even possible? How can I phrase it so that my boundaries are clear, but not sound entitled? How can I reassure an employer that I’ll do my damndest for them in my working hours, but that’s all of the time they are buying from me, and it’s not about money for me. Are my only options very casual, or leaving a job every July?

Also you mention retraining - if you did retrain as a teacher, or a accountant or data engineer or so on, it would take a couple of years at least. So your daughter will be older and much more capable by then

There are jobs that offer term time so I am sure it is possible however if you came across in an interview the way you have come across in your post then you may be discounted right away

I know you want to do this for the right reasons but you come across very entitled and you may want to soften the language and accept the fact that you may have to be a little flexible

A series of temporary jobs could work.

Lots of schools are currently struggling to fill temporary invigilator roles.

In the run up to Christmas there are often temporary retail roles.

Maybe start with something like this and see how it goes?

Or alternatively, how about amazon delivery? Deems to be self employed and pick your own shifts I think.

I have worked term time ony in a secondary school, fe college, specialist children's home.
There are lots of jobs in schools that don't have much to do with children.
What about a zero hours contract job where you can take or leave jobs, or agency?
Or part time wfh role?
I would start with some sort of temping job to get you started.

Can you work from home and then you’ll be home anyway during the school holidays.

Well, you may struggle depending on your experience and skill set but there are certainly jobs out there that would fit those requirements - the only thing is they're unlikely to be very well paid if that's an issue for you.

• Working in a school - playground assistant, dinner lady, reception, cleaner TA etc.
• Go self employed and do things like cleaning or dog walking, so you can set your own hours - but be aware many clients will want year-round service so this may not work for you.
• Civil service or public sector work
• A zero hours contract somewhere
• Sign up with an agency and do bank work
• Get a job WFH so you can work the holidays and not leave DD by herself.

A lot of companies, my old one for one, are insisting that childcare is in place for those wfh in the same way it would be if you were in the office. If not (although not quite sure how they would know for everyone) then it’s a breach of contract

Granted the OP’s DD is 11 so you could argue she can stay out of the way while OP works but 6 weeks of summer holidays is a long time to be doing that

University

I’m not sure that would help. Generally speaking, university staff work year round and the OP doesn’t to work during school holidays.

Doesn’t want to work…

Oh, for that edit button.

I work for a large accountancy firm and we let people do part time where they do 5 days a week in term time and off in the holidays. Support roles (rather than professional roles) are getting harder to come by but you could try big companies. You could maybe WFH a bit in school hols as well so that you aren't off completely.

The other thing to do is think about the career you want to do and then try and follow that but making your limitations clear. Recruitment is hard now so you'd at least be in a bargaining position but you need to offer something too.

I know what you’re saying, particularly with young children. Lockdown showed just how hard it is to wfh with children! But OP should be able to have some of the summer holidays off so it might work. I agree it’s not ideal but my friend is in a similar position and it works ok for her.

Y7s grow up a lot. She'll be 12 by Sept and there's only 1 week of hols between then and Christmas. Sack off this summer maybe and aim for Sept. I think you'd be surprised how manageable it would be to do eg a couple of shortish days in the office, or more hours if WFH, in a half term or holiday week. It looks impossible if you're not used to working but as they get into Y8 and beyond it does get easier, even with additional needs.

I suppose there is no harm in applying with your list of "red lines" but I think you'd have a lot more chance if you can be open to finding ways to make some work in hols possible, some of the time. Otherwise you're just giving employers an easy reason to choose someone else over you. It's such a cliche but you'll come across a lot better if you're demonstrating openness to adapt and offering solutions, not problems.

Courier would be an option, my friend delivers for Hermes, (now evri) and delivers whilst he’s at school and he joins her in the car when school finishes to finish off her deliveries (he has slight sen so also can’t be left for long periods)

the other option would be sign up with a employment agency and do whatever is on offer, keeping back some spends for hols and just choose not to be available for work during school hols and half terms.

some jobs it’s a matter of getting your feet under the table. My job is strictly 7/8-2 , 2/3- 9/10 but after I had been with them for over a yr I managed to secure school hours and as I’m relief, I’m not contracted for hours therefor I just don’t work in school holidays.

I work for a government agency and I know people who have worked term time only (scientific research), I also have a social worker friend (adult social services) who worked term time only.

How about admin for universities, or jobs providing services to people working in universities?
I think there are lots of jobs where term time only could work, but I have only seen it granted where someone has gone full time to term time, so their value is already known to the company. Harder to go in straight away with a request like that

Its an evening job
the Op doesnt sound like someone who wants to work evenings
Also not TT only

Could you work in nursing or in care and go on the bank when it suits you?

What are you qualified for? What jobs have you had? What jobs do you want to do? I don’t think term time contracts are popular with many employers anymore as they often don’t work very well if the business doesn’t close down during those times. How about childminder, run a toddler activity like tumbletots, beauty business, dog grooming, proof reader, accountancy/ book keeping, tutor, life coach, cake maker? Or an admin role in a school? Or something where you can work as a locum or agency staff?

Part time role in the civil service? Work from home in school hols

I worked in a large university doing 3 days pw term time only + 2 weeks. University term time, not school terms, so no half term holidays, but it worked for me when my kids were smaller. Look for pastoral support roles. The additional 2 weeks were to support ft staff with preparation for Freshers' Week and Induction.

What’s your skill set and how long have you been out of the world of work?

Not much point people suggesting care work, nursing or other specialised work if you don’t have the experience and aren’t willing or able to retrain.

I would struggle to employ you term time only as I would need to backfill you during the time when everyone else wants to take leave as well. I agree a school might suit you better

Councils might be able to do term time.

You could be a lollipop lady.

An office environment which offers hybrid working? Then you could wfh 3 to 4 days a weeknin the hols, and have 5 weeks a year vacation which you can cover 5 of the 13 weeks with, so potentially only 8 days per year where you are in the office in holiday time and you may be able to ask family and friends for help, or dd could use those days to go over to a friend's house?

And it is only for 3- 4 years, once I was 15 I had holiday jobs so was either working or seeing friends then or revising.

Bank work in the NHS. Self-employed. Non-child-facing role in a school