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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Oh do piss off, Harry

543 replies

HettySunshine · 20/04/2022 11:34

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2022/apr/20/prince-harry-says-queen-on-great-form-during-visit?CMP=ShareiOSAppp_Other

The Queen has coped for most of her life without you. I don't think she needs you 'protecting her' now.

I'm usually entire ambivalent to the royals but this has really bruised my cherry!

AIBU?

OP posts:
Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 08:38

But… why though? Why should he or they shut up? Why do you want to silence them?

Because they said they wanted a private life away from the media circus? That is what THEY wanted and live their best lives elsewhere. You can't have it both ways.

dottiedodah · 21/04/2022 08:45

He's like one of those relatives that seem to pop up to tell everyone what to do then go away again. I think he feels guilty about what has gone on with him and meghan ,wants to feel relevant .sadly he seems to want the privilege of being royal and none of the drawbacks.his involvement with invictus games is to be commended of course but he spoils it with this type of thing .PC is said to be at the end of his tether with him

Chilledchablis1 · 21/04/2022 08:49

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 06:44
“I think you are very much 'projecting' ronald your situation is nothing like that of the Queen and Royal family.

The reason Harry and Meghan have been criticised so much is that they choose to attack their own family on a global stage and call them all sorts of names whilst Prince Philip lay dying. It starts and ends with that.

No decent, caring person would ever have chosen that moment to hurt their family in such a public way when they were just about to lose Prince Philip, and H&M knew he was dying and didn't care. You can't come back from such spite and nastiness. The issue is not that many on MN are expressing absolute horror in the way that H&M have behaved, and traded their own families for money to the highest bidder. That is the issue. The betrayal, the callousness and calculated attacks will never be forgotten by most of the British public. Most of us hope we will never see them again. They should stay in the states peddling their ageing and increasingly irrelevant royal connections until the money taps run out and they sink into obscurity.”

well said .

NetflixMom21 · 21/04/2022 08:49

He is a petulant child - a self absorbed twat - he needs all of his titles removing, completely cutting off financially because he is still receiving money from Charles AND a gag order preventing him from speaking about about any other members of the family! Just when you think he can’t sink any lower

VeganGod · 21/04/2022 08:53

They said they wanted to be financially independent and that the British press was an issue and affecting mental health. So they moved away but never said they would be silent. I think people have misunderstood, deliberately.

TizerorFizz · 21/04/2022 08:57

He used the Queen to bolster his position. To say he’s checking she’s got the right people around her is just ludicrous! As if he could do anything if he judged them to be “wrong uns”! He’s all about his own publicity and PR.

They are invited onto the balcony for the Jubilee. They need shoving off it! Metaphorically of course!

Wheresthebeach · 21/04/2022 09:05

Its the endless self promotion, combined with breath taking selfishness, greed and delusional self importance. I do wish he didn't get so much press, but every time he starts to fade from the lime light he betrays his family yet again to get headlines. I assume they will simply stop speaking to him completely over time as every conversation is fodder for Netflix or the latest celebrity interview. For me, I can't stand the complaining over being 'cut off', when he's 34 million, and Charles didn't cut him off - they lie to make themselves look like victims. Its the ultimate petulant, vindictive behaviour. Give me what I want or I will do everything possible to ruin you. Awful.

TheKeatingFive · 21/04/2022 09:07

Because they said they wanted a private life away from the media circus?

they never actually said that you know.

Here's the thing. If you don't want them getting attention in the media, YOU have the power not to give it to them. The press would stop publishing stories about them if no one clicked on them. Netflix wouldn't be throwing money at them either if no one was interested.

But the same people who moan about them getting attention are also here, contributing to threads, clicking links and clearly on some level, getting satisfaction in getting riled up.

Just disengage and get on with your lives. Your greatest power over them is denying them the attention that you think they want and are angry about them getting.

RibbonofMist · 21/04/2022 09:09

Seems to me he needed to create another global stir whilst he is filming his Netflix documentary so they have content people will tune in for. Let's face it - he knows that ratings go up when the dirt is dished. They were not going to let Philip dying get in the way of Oprah (it actually helped with the build up and publicity - they could not have time it better from a ratings perspective) so why would they worry about the Queens jubilee now?

I had fondness for the Royals but really now maybe the time for the lot of them to fade into insignificance.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 21/04/2022 09:10

No decent, caring person would ever have chosen that moment to hurt their family in such a public way when they were just about to lose Prince Philip

They probably wouldn't have chosen the period of the Invictus games - a genuinely worthwhile thing - to once again make it about them either

A number of Harry's comments were completely stupid, but then I'd have expected that; what I didn't expect (or rather hoped he'd avoid) was that he'd make them at such a time

And yes the media could have refused to report it, but I very much doubt that would have suited Harry

Arucanafeather · 21/04/2022 09:10

VeganGod · 21/04/2022 08:29

He hasn’t actually spent endless time banging on about anything. As I said before we’ve got a
few hours of footage of them in years, a tiny percent of his life. And only some of that is Harry talking about family issues and therapy. So not much at all really.

As for the therapy, he has encouraged others to seek help if they’ve got through trauma. Therapy can make you feel like you can actually talk about your mental health after previously not being able to, therapy isn’t about getting you to deal with it silently. The benefit, as Harry sees it, has been that he can talk about things, see what is wrong and change that in the future in his own relationships. I believe that’s a good thing. Emotional sense to you is shutting up because granny is getting old. To say that therapy hasn’t worked because he’s talking about it too much is nothing short of ridiculous. I would imagine, Harrys therapy is an ongoing process. I would also imagine suffering the loss of his mother whilst living in the RF with their lack of emotion was very damaging. But only he will know that, there are certainly indicators of that being the case from things he’s said. It we don’t know him.

I really hate this thinking that people should shut up for the benefit of others even if it’s to the detriment of themselves. In my childhood, my mother left my father after years of abuse for us all. Me and sibling had to stay with a friend. My father threatened to burn the house down where we were staying, with us his children in it, unless my mother returned to him. All very traumatic for me aged 11. My mother returned with us and played happy families, we were to never mention it again. Years later, as an adult, I had therapy to deal with this and other aspects of an abusive childhood. I started to tell people, for the first time ever about what I’d gone through, family and friends and others that believed my father was a good man. For me, there’s a sense of wanting people to know the truth, and a wish that anyone going through similar would get the help that I found so helpful. The relief in not having to keep it to myself was huge. My mothers response, my mother that had been abused for years....’why are you telling people my business, what will people think of me’. It wasn’t only her business, it was my business, it affected me. She came up with every reason as to why it wasn’t the right time to tell anyone. Some family members sided with her, I should be quiet and stop causing trouble, accept what happened, move on, ‘if you’re so happy now, why are you going on about something from almost 20 years ago?’ my mother asked. ‘You can’t actually be happy as you wouldn’t be doing this, you’d get on with your life’. Similar to what posters here are saying and I think it’s awful.

Maybe he’s happy, maybe he’s not. Maybe he’s nice, maybe he’s not. But to base it on so little footage, a few comments, is ridiculous. The vast majority of the time, we don’t see him. There’s no right way to live your life, as long as you’re not breaking the law. He’s said a big problem was British media, and he’s moved away from them. He never took a vow of silence or said he’d never be seen again. The hatred toward him by certain posters is nothing short of weird. They seem to think they know him.

I totally hear what you’re saying and I’m so sorry for the childhood you had. It’s a tricky line IMO to do that and not to perpetuate & add to your mother’s trauma, who was also a victim. I had an extremely challenging childhood due to one parent’s mental health issues and the other’s own trauma from their childhood. Some of that trauma totally got passed on to me and it has taken years of counselling to get on an even-ish keel and whilst my mental health is ok, I have got serious stomach & digestive issues that the consultant told me is a result of long term anxiety on a sensitive digestive system. I do talk about my experiences and my feelings and that does help me - but I have made the decision to only do that with people where it won’t have an impact on my parents, who have most definitely got their own trauma still to deal with. I’m an adult now and responsible for my own health - I don’t want to bring others down and make their life harder in order to alleviate my issues.

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 09:17

thekeating I do agree people talking about them only serves to feed their well oiled PR machine, that said it is our right to express our dismay and disappointment at the treatment H&M have meted out to the Queen and the rest of the family. The Oprah interview was just so awful, you can't blame people for wanting to express their feelings about it. I might also add we are PAYING for the Jubilee, and have a right to say that we are not happy with H&M and Andrew being there. It is a democracy.

I imagine once the Queen passes Harry will be totally cut off, so he knows he has a small time frame to make his money/cash in because they know it will soon be game over. They don't have anything else that interests people, so it is their last chance. The papers and people will simply ignore them, no one will have a reason to talk about them any longer. Persona non grata.

HoppingPavlova · 21/04/2022 09:28

Emotional sense to you is shutting up because granny is getting old.

Not at all. It’s just not deliberately timing it while your grandfather is actively dying. Putting your attempt to gain maximum publicity above that is pretty poor.

TheKeatingFive · 21/04/2022 09:35

that said it is our right to express our dismay and disappointment at the treatment H&M have meted out to the Queen and the rest of the family.

Given that this is all about personal family relationships, it seems a bit odd to feel you should get involved from your position of not having met any of these people. If the Queen is happy to move on sufficiently to have them on the balcony for the Jubilee, then I'm not sure how much she'd be valuing your 'disappointment'.

They don't have anything else that interests people, so it is their last chance. The papers and people will simply ignore them, no one will have a reason to talk about them any longer. Persona non grata.

Given the behaviour of a lot of posters on here, I seriously doubt it. But I guess we'll see. Perhaps some will start practicing what they preach.

Fulmine · 21/04/2022 09:42

Not sure why people insist on accusing people of showing hate and anger simply because they acknowledge he is repeatedly showing himself as a right pratt.

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 09:56

I have met senior members of the RF, I live in the same village as some of them in fact. Please do not make assumptions thekeating
Secondly if someone behaves badly in public then they can certainly expect to be called out. It is fine for people to express their feelings.
They don't have too many admirers anymore on either side of Atlantic and that is also fine. Most wish they would just go away, it has become very tedious.

DesidaCrick · 21/04/2022 09:58

Honestly, it’s all theatre around one family. Distraction. The tories are trying yet again to push through the Police, Crime and Sentencing bill to restrict our right to peacefully protest and this is what you care about???

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 09:58

I would also add that Harry has already said he doesn't think he will be on the balcony for the Jubilee, so that is yesterdays' news no doubt 'leaked' by his PR machine to try and bounce the RF into inviting them. Over PW dead body will H&M be there, so I am not expecting to have to worry about. I shall just be glad if HM makes it to the celebration and can join in at least with some of the festivities.

x2boys · 21/04/2022 09:59

Fulmine · 21/04/2022 09:42

Not sure why people insist on accusing people of showing hate and anger simply because they acknowledge he is repeatedly showing himself as a right pratt.

What would you call the increasing vicious verbal attacks from posters on here about Harry and Meghan ?
Two people nobody on here knows anything about,
It's quite eye opening how people can get so angry and out raged about people they have never met and will never meet
And outraged on the Queen's behalf too!

x2boys · 21/04/2022 10:02

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 09:56

I have met senior members of the RF, I live in the same village as some of them in fact. Please do not make assumptions thekeating
Secondly if someone behaves badly in public then they can certainly expect to be called out. It is fine for people to express their feelings.
They don't have too many admirers anymore on either side of Atlantic and that is also fine. Most wish they would just go away, it has become very tedious.

Unless you are a senior member of the Royal family,I very much doubt you know the ins and outs of their private family buissness

TheKeatingFive · 21/04/2022 10:07

I have met senior members of the RF, I live in the same village as some of them in fact.

so you feel you're close enough to get involved in their personal family relationships? Really? I'd only consider my very closest friends as having any kind of legitimate opinion on something like this.

It is fine for people to express their feelings.

Well it may be, but it's just not terribly relevant to the people involved when you don't actually know anything (bar some tiny details) of what actually happened

Most wish they would just go away

clearly not, as they keep engaging

RibbonofMist · 21/04/2022 10:10

Is interesting the timing they seem to give these interviews. On their South Africa tour there had been such favourable coverage - which was blown away by their ITV interviews at the end of the tour. All the media then focussed on was the interview and the comments made about themselves and the Royal Family.

Here we have the Invictus Games - again the focus completely taken off the games and the competitors and onto Harry and his comments about the Royal Family.

How is this using their platform for service and to shine light on others and good causes. They take that spotlight and turn it straight back onto themselves at every opportunity.

PierresPotato · 21/04/2022 10:21

It's true I don't know the royal family but I do have brothers and one is definitely the type who pops in for 5 minutes every few years out of their everyday life (somewhere far far away where the cameras, phones and post don't appear to work) and sticks his oh so very important oar in.
I was reminded of this watching yesterday's BBC news covering this story.
(I wish I'd not seen it but was caught unawares and somewhat immobile atm I couldn't run out of the room!)

the80sweregreat · 21/04/2022 10:23

They have to turn it back on themselves all the time because they have these Netflix deals to do and make and more money to make. living where they do must be eye watering expensive and security costs alone must break the bank ; they are now in celebrity league with people around them far richer they are. They know they have to stay relevant in order to keep it rolling in and honor their contracts.
It must be a huge pressure to be honest : one they have made themselves I know this, but Harry hasn't any other talents to fall back on to make even more millions needed to stay living there, so having a film crew following him is the trade off.
It's not a settled future for him really despite their current wealth, it's still peanuts really compared to the likes of Oprah or the Clooney's and they know this!

Swayingpalmtrees · 21/04/2022 10:23

And so do you thekeating why do you keep posting if you want everyone to stop talking about them?

What I see on here a lot is the silencing of opinion.

Probably pushed by the H&M team to stop too much scrutiny of their behaviour, the same reason they keep taking people to court. They don't want a magnifying glass on their lies and stories, they would prefer it if we all shut up and let them get on with their shady money spinning deals and the gas lighting of each of their families.

Sorry but no. We will keep calling them out for as long as they carry on with their hypocrisy and self serving publicity stunts.

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