To not have bought eggs for DSCs?

[eggsbenedict82]

Long story short, DSD (10yo) and DSS (8yo) are being dropped off here later by DH's ex. The whole visit was arranged with short notice, and only briefly rushed past me, as DH knows I have been busy preparing Easter for our 3yo DS.
This morning, after DS had opened his eggs, DH asked where the DSCs eggs are so they can be set up for later.
I told him I had not bought any, and when he got indignant I said it's as simple as they're not my DCs, they're his, it's not my fault he's waited until Easter day, when no shops are open. Not my responsibility, but as per usual, I've been cast as the wicked stepmother - happy Easter, hey? AIBU

Yes, he's 43 and MIL still buys him eggs. I know, right

My bloke’s 64 and I bought him an Easter egg. 🤷‍♀️

What is sad that there were celebrations planned for one child with no thought for step children. Looks quite deliberate. Your OH should share his eggs but that doesn't excuse your behaviour

Poor kids, give them some eggs

It will be quite ok if they don't have any eggs at that age, they are not toddlers.. But perhaps their Mother got eggs for them at home.

@Doubleraspberry

I’m feeling quite guilty now that I just chucked some Creme Eggs into the garden and sent the kids out to find them! They are being seriously short changed on Easter.

I put two of those crème egg size lindor eggs in a flowerpot for my daughter to find and then dragged her to church. Worst mum ever

@ShirleyPhallus

I have been busy preparing Easter for our 3yo DS.

What preparation is needed for a 3 year old at Easter?!

This! I just can’t imagine what that entails. 😂

So I think if you knew The SC were coming before or while you were “preparing for Easter for your DS” the it really wasn’t too much to get some eggs for your SC. They are still young. Usually I would’ve done like you but I realize it’s just petty to be this way.

I was sort of on the fence until you said you’d bought your nieces eggs.
I think it’s actually really fucking mean to buy them one and not your step kids

@Tillsforthrills thank you.
@moaningturtle same here.

I'm in my 50's and it still rankels. I have a step grandson and a grandchild on the way. I've made a vow to myself I will NEVER treat them any differently.

All this Easter arranging and you can't buy an Easter Egg for DSC. No wonder people struggle with relationships in blended families.

Regardless of who was buying the eggs, presents and whatever other preparation there is for Easter DSC should at least have been bought an egg. I think your DH was reasonable to assume with all the preparation and busyness you would of at least picked up a couple of eggs.

Maybe this will teach him you see them as 'his' children and are unimportant to you.

So your household shopping gets delivered, I can’t see how it’s unreasonable that he thought you would press the + button to add on eggs for his kids aswell as yours and your niece and nephew, regardless of their visit being short notice, it’s not daft to assume the eggs would just be given to them when they did eventually visit. I agree that now it’s done he should give them some of his eggs. You deliberately didn’t order your step kids eggs in the home delivery though, I no many will disagree with me here but I think YABU. And no I don’t hate step mothers, I just think adding a few more to an online basket isn’t an effort.

[quote Tillsforthrills]@SamphirethePogoingStickerist

You expect the Mum to send them with Easter eggs to your house.

You still had time to get them some, to make up for the fact that they have a shit dad and it wouldn’t be unequal for the kids. Lovely step mum aren’t you.[/quote]
😃 I'm not a mum if any sort. I was following the phrasing if the poster I quoted. Your determination to chastise a stepmum has led you to make assumptions.

I am always flabbergasted by the furious attempts to make stepmums responsible for all failings between separated parents whilst also berating them if they do try to become involved.

I mean, there must be another thread here about a stepmum who has fed her DSCs too much chocolate, the same special egg as mum did, etc etc. There are always threads about stepmums who can't do right for doing wrong. Never a one about parents, the dad, not thinking ahead and getting shit sorted.

I was with you until I saw that you found out on Wednesday about this visit. 4 days notice is not last minute. YABU to expect us to believe that you didn't leave the house once since Wednesday so could have picked up a couple of eggs or that you couldn't have started a conversation with your husband about his need to pick up some eggs.

You come across as petty, this was about point scoring at the expense of 2 young children. I say this as a mum who does all of the 'wife work' and really resents it.

I would have got them eggs, just like I get neices and nephews eggs. They're not my children but I love them and if I'm buying the eggs I get them for everyone. Likewise, if my husband were buying the eggs, he would get them for everyone.

This takes petty to another level. Do you mentally check before you do anything in case DH should be doing it? Imagine if you had a DC who wasn't your DHs, how would you feel if it was the other way round? For the sake of a couple of pounds is it really worth making the SDC feel less than just to prove a point to your DH?

By having a child with these children's dad, they have become your family. To use them as tools for point scoring is, quiet honestly, pathetic.

It's a couple of bloody Easter eggs. Don't be so cruel to them. I buy eggs for my niece and nephew. This is no different.

(Yes, he's 43 and MIL still buys him eggs. I know, right)

You 'know right' what?? What's wrong with buying chocolate for other adults at Easter?

Yes, he should've thought about Easter eggs for his kids once he knew they were coming, but come on between the two of you I'm sure you can sort them something.

Even though the children and their eggs are his responsibility, I would have automatically just picked some up for them when I was buying one for my own child. It seems mean and petty to let children suffer just because they aren't yours.

You sound pretty mean. You were buying for 3 year old and nieces - why not click twice more and add to shop? Presume you don't like the poor kids.

Well yes, I suppose if we're point scoring then it is his responsibility to get eggs for his children. Not really a healthy way to go about life, though, particularly for the poor children who had no say in getting their lives messed up.

Another who is not sure why you would worry about whether you'd see them precisely on Easter Sunday to work out whether you bought them an egg. Do they not get birthday presents if you don't see them on the right day? Not even as if you had to carry them home from the shops.

All that aside, if your 3 year old has enough to talk about sharing them out then he clearly has far too many, and who on earth feels like 'preparing Easter' is a major task?

Ah, the Christian spirit of Easter.

He is a twat - he thinks you are his Personal Assistant. Tell him to get to feck.

This is seriously irritating. Why are posters being nasty to OP? Blame the woman ....

You all need to chill a little bit. You are judging OP, but you have no idea if she was busy or not? Why is she the one preparing and buying everything? There is nothing wrong with just buying for her child and her nieces.

Their dad cannot just get away by dumping all the responsibility on OP. Why are you blaming the woman for not doing what posters think she should have guessed?

Did the DSC's mum buy anything for OP's child?

@sweepeep

I did buy my three nieces eggs and a gift each, as my sister does the same for DS.

Jesus h Christ that makes it even worse!! I take back what I said YABU

😂 I agree. I had to read this twice to make sure I read it correctly. What a shame.

@2pinkginsplease

Who normally buys their eggs?

Surely you could have picked up 2 extra eggs when you picked up your own child’s egg?

Or maybe you both should have discussed it before now.

The visit was arranged last minute. She didn’t spitefully not get them any Easter eggs. Besides, HE should have made sure he had got them. They’re his children.