Friend asked me to do a lateral flow before I met her today ....cheeky?

[reeedleed]

I have zero covid symptoms
I've had all 3 jabs she's had none
She doesn't believe in using anti bac /hand gel (fair enough )
Yet she had the audacity to ask me to do a lateral flow?
Aibu to think it's cheeky ?

@Nelliephant1

Not at all. Your friend was being immensely sensible.

By not having the vaccines?

How does she even know if you have any? They're not free now. Tell her to buy one.

Meet her where? If it's at her house I don't see a problem. It's like asking people to take off their shoes or only smoke outside.

Tell her you’ll do the test if she’ll get the vaccines. She’s selfish. She wants people to protect her but she can’t be bothered to join in with the responsibility of protecting the rest of society

I think if she was vaccinated fair enough. Because she isn’t, YANBU

What do you mean by "doesn't trust the vaccines"? Do you mean "hasn't had the vaccines" or "has had the vaccines but doesn't consider them ironclad protection "?

Generally not cheeky to ask you to do a test. You can always say no, and then she can decide if she still wants to see you. I take tests before seeing family and friends in indoor locations where I expect to not wear a mask to eat, chat etc.

@emmathedilemma

Probably sensible rather than cheeky given that she’s not been vaccinated!

she said she was anti BAC not vacc unless it's typo.

I know someone like this. Her and her DH won’t get vaccinated because ‘it’s dangerous’ (both are heavy smokers and drinkers and she’s taken lots of illegal drugs). If we have group meet ups she requests people do LFTs. I did them when they were free but now I won’t. If I was actually ill then I’d test but I’m not spending money on tests when I feel well because she won’t get vaccinated.

Sorry I see she has had none

@PurpleDaisies I agree. I've asked for my posts to be removed.

I just see it as everyone has their own personal reasons for doing things/ not doing things.
It's OK for her to request you do a lateral flow, and it's OK for you to refuse.
If she's not vaccinated she will have her own personal reasons for making that choice too.
For what it's worth the people I know who are unvaccinated all have extreme anxiety - whether that be needle phobia or fears of the vaccine itself.
I'm fully vaccinated and have just suffered really badly with covid, yet my friend hasn't had any vaccines and coped fine with covid.
Everyone is different.

Ask her to do a different medical test before meeting you. You can buy tests for HIV, chlamydia all sorts!

Asking someone to undergo a medical test at financial cost to themselves is ridiculous.

If they are worried about meeting you they should stay home.

Did she pay for it?

God I wish I had the nerve to do this. I’m fully vaccinated and boosted though but if I could ask everyone I come into contact with to test I would do. I know it’s not practical or realistic but if anyone wanted me to test I’d be happy to do so. I live in Australia though so we are used to covid tests for bloody everything, just to go to a different part of the country until recently! I had to pcr test just to get from NSW to come home to Queensland for Christmas. Not a problem. My son got sent home from school a few weeks ago with a headache and they insisted we tested him before he returned the next day. All good, they provide the test. Thankfully was negative but it’s always best to be safe. Just do the test.

I don't think it's a terrible request depending on how it was asked.

There's a polite way to say 'would it be safest if we maybe all do LTFs before we meet up just to be extra safe?' Not rude.

But 'you need to do one first' is rude

@Winkydink

Well I was all ready to say she’s not cheeky, it’s completely reasonable as it’s a nasty virus. If there was a way of checking if friends kids were incubating norovirus I’d insist on it before every play date.

But…if she’s chosen not to be vaccinated because she doesn’t “trust” them then yes, it’s cheeky and she’s not very bright. Working in the healthcare system, and with the scientists who developed the vaccines, I’ve run out of patience with people who don’t “trust” them (I know that’s not a politic or polite way of expressing my views but there you go).

I think they're two separate issues really.

Yes she's daft for not trusting the vaccine.

I would still do an LFT if she asked me to because she is even more at risk if she isn't vaccinated.

Seems petty to risk someone getting really ill just because they're a bit stupid about vaccines.

Yanbu

I'd say it's cheeky given that she's not vaccinated. I'd have told her to jog on.

I might raise my eyebrows slightly as unvax’d but it wouldn’t bother me and I’d do it.

I don’t expect my friends to think or have the same logic as I do, I’m sure they’ve raised their eyebrows at some of my logic too.

I’d have no friends if I picked at every single little thing and anyone way out of my thinking wouldn’t be a friend anyway.

I’ve been doing LFTs on me and toddler when meeting up with a particular friend, she’s vax’d but has health anxiety exacerbated by covid and I like to reassure her because I love her and she would do the same for me if I needed it.

The request wouldn’t bother me and I would happily do it.

She has chosen to have no vaccines.
She won't use hand sanitiser.
She isn't overly vulnerable to covid.

Who is paying for the LFT?

If she was offering to pay for one and I really wanted to see her, I'd do one.

If I needed to go out and pay for one in order to see someone who won't even do the basics themselves, I'd just not bother seeing her.

Cheeky and pointless as it may well be negative at the start even if you have it.

She sounds bonkers.

@reeedleed

She doesn't trust the vaccines She is fit and healthy and no one in the family has health issues.

My friend does this. No to vaccines for her family, but wants everyone else to test before they see her 🙈