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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Should Mumsnet have it's own middle class section ?

313 replies

hattie43 · 16/04/2022 18:36

Reading some of these threads turning nasty it's really apparent that people have such different lives there will never be common ground . Nor does there need to be but the insults are not nice.

A thread posted by someone asking a question , to some a reasonable question being jumped on by ' the poor ' as tone deaf means legitimate conversation has been drowned out .

Should Mumsnet be divided so
' middle classes 'can discuss things the poor don't relate to and likewise ' the poor ' can discuss their issues without ' tone deaf ' comments from people who aren't financially destitute ?

The other thing I don't get is why jump on a thread you don't like why not just scroll on by and join a discussion you do like . Being a hater is never going to resolve anything .

OP posts:

707smile · 17/04/2022 01:02

@hattie43

Reading some of these threads turning nasty it's really apparent that people have such different lives there will never be common ground . Nor does there need to be but the insults are not nice.

A thread posted by someone asking a question , to some a reasonable question being jumped on by ' the poor ' as tone deaf means legitimate conversation has been drowned out .

The other thing I don't get is why jump on a thread you don't like why not just scroll on by and join a discussion you do like . Being a hater is never going to resolve anything .

Oh God no! It's important for people to know how other people live.

Also you can be middle class and poor.

EmeraldShamrock1 · 17/04/2022 01:48

^A thread posted by someone asking a question , to some a reasonable question being jumped on by ' the poor '^
By "the poor" 🤣

CallMeNutribullet · 17/04/2022 02:06

I have to say op, you don't write particularly well. I'm one of "the poor" and you don't come across like you've had a nice middle class education to me.

Maybe if we had segregation by class you'd be tossed out after your first thread.

CallMeNutribullet · 17/04/2022 02:08

@EmeraldShamrock1

^A thread posted by someone asking a question , to some a reasonable question being jumped on by ' the poor '^ By "the poor" 🤣

We were probably just trying to get a heat from her Aga

Nat6999 · 17/04/2022 03:10

Alrightjacket the posters who think that anyone in social housing should be eternally greatful that they live in what sometimes are barely in a fit state to live in & if they dare to complain are told that if they don't like it they should buy a home themselves. If horror of horrors they are on benefits through no fault of their own. I have just seen a thread where someone was asking about dating someone who had missing teeth & the majority of the answers were that they should pay for implants at £2k a tooth, some people don't even have £1 to spare let alone £2k+. If they had to live in the world of the less fortunate they would have a big shock.

TalkingCat · 17/04/2022 03:24

Why are you obsessed with class, OP? I know the UK particularly seems to have a strange obsession with class (I am not in the UK, and here in Australia everyone is considered the same class except the top one percent, just some have more money or luck than others) but wanting to segregate society on this site into class is a step beyond the usual UK batshittery class obsession. What next, segregate based on race?

5128gap · 17/04/2022 07:42

@CallMeNutribullet

I have to say op, you don't write particularly well. I'm one of "the poor" and you don't come across like you've had a nice middle class education to me.

Maybe if we had segregation by class you'd be tossed out after your first thread.

Interesting. While all forms of expression are valid, I did think that something in the tone and the use of 'haters' and 'jeez', plus the lack of awareness (education?) that referring to a group in the definitive is not really the done thing, and that affluence and social class are not the same; are not typical MC signifyers. Though being WC myself, possibly I'm not best placed to judge.

Lunar27 · 17/04/2022 07:51

Should Mumsnet be divided

Absolutely not.

But people should appreciate that we all have different perspectives, backgrounds and it's perfectly valid to write about them without having to provide a list of caveats.

Ahgoonyegirlye · 17/04/2022 07:52

‘The poor’ OP,
Seriously?? There are quite a few steps in between being poor and MC you know…
I was once probably ‘ the poor’ as you put it, then not so poor but solidly WC in my teens and now my career,
Education and income have moved me into what most people would call MC. My kids are certainly living a MC life. But coming from WC background I have experiences and opinions that cross all socio-economic classes.
As do many people. Oh, and yes I do have a cleaner… I have also worked as a cleaner.
It’s not quite as clear cut as you make out.

Beckstar0 · 17/04/2022 07:58

Nah, you’d still get “the poor” hijacking the section to tell everyone how unreasonable they are.

I grew up poor, now I’m not - so I can relate to both areas

THisbackwithavengeance · 17/04/2022 08:12

Thing is, if you believe MN rhetoric about the recent rise in the cost of living, it's as if posters are pulling wheelbarrows of shekels around trying to buy a loaf of mouldy bread in some post apocalyptic hellhole.

I have always shopped carefully and frugally and haven't noticed a massive difference tbh.

DontWiltMySpinachPlease · 17/04/2022 08:12

"the poor" is a disgusting way to phrase working class people or those who struggle.

Blackmagicqueen · 17/04/2022 08:13

"Nah, you’d still get “the poor” hijacking the section to tell everyone how unreasonable they are.
I grew up poor, now I’m not - so I can relate to both areas"

Well aren't you the pinnacle of understanding. For every ignorant class divide secregation statement we will all be sure to come to you for validation.

Patchbatch · 17/04/2022 08:15

@DontWiltMySpinachPlease

"the poor" is a disgusting way to phrase working class people or those who struggle.

Thats usually how people who traipse into the threads refer to them though- won't someone think of the poooooor

Patchbatch · 17/04/2022 08:16

@THisbackwithavengeance

I have always shopped carefully and frugally and haven't noticed a massive difference tbh.

Yes, or the thought process that anyone on benefits is languishing with the light of their oil lamp whilst living off of scraps from the streets. Those who often try and remind people some people have less than others are ironically the most ignorant of all.

SucculentChalice · 17/04/2022 08:18

I hate the British class system and have no idea which class I'm supposed to be in as I work for a living but have bought a house with a mortgage, which according to some on here classifies me as privileged and rich and not entitled to have an opinion on some things.

I hate this weaponising poverty and brandishing it as a tool to throw about to exclude people from having opinions unless you are virtuously poor. Competitive poverty and fake empathy make me want to puke.

In real life I have friends from all walks and don't judge them but if they were to accuse me of being privileged for having a job (I have seen it written on here that its a "privilege to be able to work" fgs) I'd cut them off because in real life no-one would put up with that level of idiocy.

Blackmagicqueen · 17/04/2022 08:20

"Yes, or the thought process that anyone on benefits is languishing with the light of their oil lamp whilst living off of scraps from the streets. Those who often try and remind people some people have less than others are ironically the most ignorant of all."

God have some compassion for those less fortunate and maybe an ounce of human decency. The ignorance on this thread is astounding.

Beckstar0 · 17/04/2022 08:25

@Blackmagicqueen

Not sure what you’re problem is, I’m saying I feel like I can post on either subject, I don’t need a segregated board. Everyone’s lives are different and everyone is entitled to post about their own situation.

LynetteScavo · 17/04/2022 08:26

Mumsnet was the middle class version - (it is possible to be poor and middle class, or financially comfortable and working class) most posters were also mums and female. Now any old person posts, and most people don't seem to know whether they're middle class or not so it's not going to work really, is it

Blackmagicqueen · 17/04/2022 08:29

Not knowing the problem is exactly the problem. I will spell it out: The more fortunate condescendingly downplaying the poverty faced by the less fortunate is ignorance amd disgusting.

flashbac · 17/04/2022 08:36

I'm really amused that people are defending a thread where the op said the rising costs are A GOOD THING because it made her more mindful of her overconsumption.
A GOOD THING.
It's very likely some people are going to freeze or starve (or both) for goodness sake (rich and well off people will think this an exaggeration, it is not).

SpilltheTea · 17/04/2022 08:42

Why are you assuming that everyone who had a problem with the thread is poor? You can have money and not be ignorant.

Beckstar0 · 17/04/2022 08:44

@Blackmagicqueen

Not knowing the problem is exactly the problem. I will spell it out: The more fortunate condescendingly downplaying the poverty faced by the less fortunate is ignorance amd disgusting.

Can you point out to me where I downplayed poverty?

jaundicedoutlook · 17/04/2022 09:05

We should make it compulsory to have a profile picture that precisely denotes our class status, thereby warning people in advance what to expect from our judgemental posts…!

LampLighter414 · 17/04/2022 09:07

This thread is tone deaf OP, you should save your mental energy for thinking about the people or Ukraine and how you'll afford to keep the house warm.

I hope this gets deleted by HQ

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