Woman took pic of my DD on the bus today😂

[babyhaha]

So I had a miserable start to the day today.
I’m 38 weeks pregnant and will be having my C section on Tuesday. I booked a restaurant for DD, DP and I so we can have one last meal just the three of us before our newborn arrives. Whilst we were on the bus, the driver announced that the bus had to terminate as Westminster Bridge was closed because of protests. So here I was with the worst PGP known to man having to walk from Lambeth North all the way to the other side of the bridge.

Anyways! We were finally able to get on a bus and when I got on, I parked the pushchair in the wheelchair space and sat next to an older lady who was already sitting down. I noticed she was on her phone and then suddenly she put her phone up as if to take a picture. I looked at her phone to make sure it was facing her and not my DD but my surprise, she had put it facing DD and had actually taken a picture of her! (DP was also in it)

I said to her, ‘excuse me, why did you just take a picture of my child, delete that.’ She said ‘oh she’s just so cute,’ I said, ‘you can’t just take pictures of kids you don’t know without asking, you need to delete that.’ She deleted it with no hesitation and then I asked her to go into her recently deleted and delete it from there too. She didn’t know how to do that so she let me show her. She then replied ‘thank you, I respect your decision’ ???

It was such a bizzare but funny situation to be in. When I think back, I keep laughing because it just felt like a surreal moment! The last time I caught someone taking a picture of my DD, he was so embarrassed I caught him and was stuttering trying to give an explanation as to why. This woman’s reaction is so different to that and it’s making me chuckle. It’s also making me think how normal this could be? Do you ever see a cute baby and just take a picture of them without asking their parents? Has anything like this happened to you before?

And before anyone starts, this isn’t a case of PFB. I would have said the same if someone took a pic of my 14 year old sister, another family member or even a friend. You can’t just go taking pictures of people you don’t know because you want too!

It doesn't sound as though the woman had any sinister intent and it was kind of her to delete the photo. But it isn't illegal to photograph anyone in public, as PPs have pointed out. You and your child have probably been photographed at other times without your knowledge. And of course there is CCTV everywhere, Ring doorbells, etc. We're all being recorded much of the time we're in public.

@VyeBrator

I said, ‘you can’t just take pictures of kids you don’t know without asking

The thing is she can, so you're lucky she deleted it really.

Yeah, legal, but fucking weird though.

It does seem pretty odd to take a picture of someone else's child, no matter how cute they are. But to be honest I couldn't get worked up about it. We're all being photographed and recorded much of the time we are in public.

@LJAKS

I had a group of tourists taking pictures and videos of my wedding because it was at Gretna 🥴😂 mad to think some wee family somewhere are sitting with wedding photos of me in an album somewhere. Long since divorced too 😂

Same here! A tourist minibus was snapping away at me in my dress

leave it out, save some concern for yourself.

Naive or sinister, not sure which.

[quote ChristinaBlang]@babyhaha a toddler group is not a public space though, so they would need your permission. If you are just out in public then photos can be taken.[/quote]
@ChristinaBlang ah right that makes sense. I would think someone who works for the shopping centre would still ask for permission to take a picture of someone using the play area but I guess they don’t HAVE too

[quote Goldijobsandthe3bears]@MurmuratingStarling You sound more scary than the old lady tbh[/quote]
😂

Dramatic, dirty minded or at a loose end of Friday, not suuuuure which 😌

This woman with a pushchair ran up to me and began loudly remonstrating. Her son was on the ride also, his dad was behind him. I had barely even registered that there was another child there; only had eyes for mine. Also never put children pics on social media but I suppose she didn’t know that. I apologised immediately and deleted.

I would have told her not to be so bloody ridiculous, I was taking a photo of my child and their friends in a public place which is completely legal. So what if her child is in the background of a photo? I would ask if her child was a looked after child and if so I was would reassure her that I would not share the photo with anyone but I would never delete a photo of my own child because some hysterical parent accuses me of nefarious intent. How fucking insulting.

People need to be aware that if they don't want to accidently appear in the background of someone's photo they need to stop going to public places. No-one is doing anything wrong by taking a photo of you, it is not against the law.

@1Micem0use

When I taught in Asia I was on a school trip in a sort of heritage museum place. The kids were having a tea ceremony lesson in a ground floor building and other visitors were wandering around. A bunch of white American tourists walked past and started taking photos of the children. I was furious. The kids weren't part of the museum! Their parents hadnt given permission and I doubt these tourists would dream of taking photos of random American kids on a school trip.

When we were in Singapore with DD who was 9 months, the locals photographed her everywhere we went.

It is perfectly legal to take pictures in public.

This. People who are serious about photography have been taking photos of others in public for decades - go to a library and look at any photography book!

What a drama over nothing.

I have (adorable) identical twin boys. When they were 2 we were on holiday at a popular Scottish destination. A coach load of Japanese tourists arrived & I swear every single one took a photo of my boys. At the time I was totally bewildered by it & I now think it was less weird than just a single person taking a photo of them would have been.

I often chuckle at the idea 50 random families in Japan have had to sit and look at photos of random English 2 year olds!

I don’t get why you all care. Even if some stranger wanted to do something horrible with picture of my son, it’s not like it is harming him, is it? Unless I put a bag over his head he will be seen in public. Can’t get worked up about it.

My adult daughter works in a famous London attraction.
She has often regaled us of a particular group of people from a particular part of the world who would delight in taking photos of adults and children in wheelchairs or who displayed obvious non-typical behaviours.

Exactly. People have been taking pictures of kids in the street in developing countries for travelogues since cameras were invented. They are all over Sunday supplements and Lonely Planet guides.

It's legal to take photos of people in public places. Its kind of her to delete it. Once I was walking with my little daughter and it was drizzling so she had her raincoat and princess brolley and wellies on and a lady who was seated on a bench took a photo of her. I wasn't very happy, but I didn't say anything because she isn't doing anything illegal. The combination of colours would have made a nice photo so I can see why she took a photo. I am sure my daughters images are stored on cctv footage taken on all the public transport my daughter has been on and other public places she has been to. Not sure why you are chuckling though . If the lady told you to do one then i suspect you won't be chuckling

My brother was blonde as a toddler. My mother went on holiday and had the unfortunate experience of having him physically hauled out of her arms by tourists who wanted to take a picture with him. It apparently happened multiple times during that trip.

This was somewhere in Greece I believe, in late 80s.

I don’t get why you all care. Even if some stranger wanted to do something horrible with picture of my son, it’s not like it is harming him, is it?

Is that you Jono Joly? Sick🤮

I do wonder if there’s other people that have taken pictures of her and I just haven’t realised
Quite likely - and she will be on loads of CCTV of course.

I think you handled it very well op. If she was elderly she probably didn't realise how sinister this can be. It doesn't sound like she meant harm and I'm glad you didn't "go loco" on her.

Thanks @HaveringWavering you’ve distracted the crazy on to you now

How old was she, d'you think, OP?

I'm in my early 60s. I grew up with a Brownie camera that only took square pictures, 12 at a time, and you had to wait for them to be developed and printed when you got home. It was expensive (by my standards), and sometimes the shop lost the film. So taking photos was a rare luxury. Not quite the Victorian portrait era, but actually, looking at today's proliferation of digital imagery, closer to the Victorian portrait era than to today!

I remember my brother taking a Polaroid photo of me when I was 15, and the excitement as we watched it develop right in front of our eyes. We couldn't believe it! That's as instant as photography got, and it was in black and white. (god, I sound like a fucking dinosaur!!!)

I'd never dream of taking photos of some stranger's kids, but only because I'm not particularly interested in other people's children. But the novelty of having something as portable as a mobile phone, where you can see pictures instantly, is probably intoxicating to some people of my generation who have room for a little hobby in their life.

I'm such a clucking nincompoop if confronted by evidence of my own lack of connection to reality (or "current etiquette") that I'd probably react a bit like she did, if caught stashing away photos to enjoy later. Mine would be of cats and sunsets and countryside, but my DH is quite a bit younger than me and has scolded me for taking photos in busy malls etc. It never crossed my mind that I was violating privacy boundaries that never existed before. The public realm used to be the public realm, no one ringfenced it.

For those of us who don't have a social media profile and don't get the compulsion to share this sort of thing, the new etiquette feels a bit weird. I understand it, but not everyone is a pervert.

I gotta say I don't find it funny either. I don't find her reaction funny, your reaction funny, or anything. I would have been upset and stressed to be put in a situation where I would have had to confront someone like that and about something like that, even if it turned out okay like it did with you.

I'm not saying you should have been angry or outraged or rude, just the fact you find it funny is really weird to me.

YWNBU to not want a random stranger taking pics of your DC.

@HaveringWavering

I don’t get why you all care. Even if some stranger wanted to do something horrible with picture of my son, it’s not like it is harming him, is it? Unless I put a bag over his head he will be seen in public. Can’t get worked up about it.

I must admit I agree with this, too.

For all I know, all kinds of people have sneakily taken photos of me over the years and are wanking over them right now!

@HaveringWavering

I don’t get why you all care. Even if some stranger wanted to do something horrible with picture of my son, it’s not like it is harming him, is it? Unless I put a bag over his head he will be seen in public. Can’t get worked up about it.

😕