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Being annoyed by friend judging name choices

109 replies

87beck · 13/04/2022 11:50

Our second son was born a few weeks ago and we decided to name him Jack

My friend met him for the first time yesterday and decided to inform me that her DH has commented that if they ever have a boy, jack would've been the last name on their list as it's associated with bad behaved boys etc and it's just not "a cool name" & also said that my first boys name isn't cool and why do we go for such simplistic names ..?

It might just be the postpartum hormones but I'm soooo angry she decided to share this with me .. wtf !
I Didn't say anything but my DH said next time he will see them he will mention the unnecessary comment.
I would never judge anyone's name choices so I'm super angry that behind close doors they bitch about my boys names 🥲 not in a rush to meet up with her again

OP posts:
Womeninblack · 13/04/2022 11:57

Just leave it.
It was a careless comment and she probably said it without thinking. No need to make it a big thing

FairFuming · 13/04/2022 11:58

What she did is shitty. Hopefully she just wasn't thinking and said some really stupid things. But you're entitled to be upset.
Next time just tell her You don't give a flying fuck what her boyfriend thinks and if she's going to be so rude about your amazing new baby she can leave.

Congratulations on the birth of your son.

pepsirolla · 13/04/2022 12:00

Yanbu, what a nasty, needless thing to say! I would be reconsidering this "friendship" even if you don't agree with a baby's name choice,unless it's really out there it's unreasonable to say so. Btw I love the name and any I have met have always been lovely

Tlollj · 13/04/2022 12:01

Well I like Jack. Good honest straightforward name. And for what it’s worth names don’t make kids naughty.

Llamapolice · 13/04/2022 12:01

That is rude. It's a golden etiquette rule of my mum's to never comment negatively on a baby's name or appearance! Saying that if she's not usually like that I'd just leave it now.

MurmuratingStarling · 13/04/2022 12:02

Some bloody friend. Hmm What a nasty woman. Hmm

FWIW the name JACK is a great name. Several of my family are/were called Jack! Cousin/great uncle/great great grandad.

How fucking rude making those nasty comments. I would be giving her a wide berth tbh.

WhackingPhoenix · 13/04/2022 12:02

I love the name Jack. I’ve known Jacks of all ages (the oldest was 97!) and they’ve been wonderful Smile

PierresPotato · 13/04/2022 12:03

She wasn't being very friendly.

10HailMarys · 13/04/2022 12:05

It is incredibly rude to sneer to someone's face about their children's names. Unless someone has just announced that they're intending to call their child Jimmy-Savile Hitler or Twatty Pants Fuckface or something, the polite thing to do is say 'Aw, lovely' and move on. Your friend is a dickhead.

FWIW I think Jack is a lovely name and also one that's quite dear to me for family reasons - I have a lovely, kind, thoughtful teenage relative called Jack and he was named that after an equally lovely and much-missed older family member :)

surlycurly · 13/04/2022 12:05

I'm a teacher and lots of Jacks a lovely boys- not badly behaved at all. And it could have been worse- the day I had my son I told my mum his name and asked if she like it and she said 'no, I hate it actually. It's unlucky'. That one has kind of stuck with me if I'm honest!

NellesVilla · 13/04/2022 12:07

OP, I love Jack as a name (as do many others; hence why it’s a popular name), any I’m v fussy and opinionated when it comes to names!

Enjoy spending the time you used to spend with your ‘friend’, with your new son instead!

MyCatIsAFuckwit · 13/04/2022 12:09

Jack is a lovely name, it will never date or go "out of fashion"

babyjellyfish · 13/04/2022 12:09

Congratulations on your new baby OP.

YANBU to be annoyed at your "friend". What a shitty comment.

Jack is a perfectly fine name.

amusedbush · 13/04/2022 12:11

Why would she tell you that?? She can judge all she likes in the privacy of her own home (or better yet, inside her head!) but what the fuck was she hoping to achieve by telling you? It serves absolutely no purpose other than to upset you, which she must have known.

What an arsehole.

John nn. Jack is well-used in my family, spanning ages 10 - 90. It's a great name.

87beck · 13/04/2022 12:14

Thanks everyone for your lovely comments & reassurance that his name is perfectly normal 🙈 It really did get to me and made me wonder if we chose Boring & out of date names. But we love them & great to read that you all don't think it's a bad name choice.
Thank you

OP posts:
TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 13/04/2022 12:16

She sounds weirdly jealous.

Jack is a fantastic name. I went through a phase where I wish I’d named DS Jack instead of his name.

Ignore her. She sounds weird.

Viviennemary · 13/04/2022 12:19

There is nothing wrong with the name. Your friend sounds horrible.

Maray1967 · 13/04/2022 12:20

She was incredibly rude. I might have said a very pointed ‘I beg your pardon?’ But might have been so taken aback that I didn’t.
Do you really want these people as friends?

UhtredsLatestPaganHussy · 13/04/2022 12:22

She was being a total dick and you’d have been well within your rights to tell her as much.

diddl · 13/04/2022 12:24

What a shit stirrer she is!

Tell your husband not to say anything-don't let them think that you've given their nasty comment any thought.

I can't help thinking that you'll just be labelled "sensitive/hormonal" or some such shit.

Congratulations on a newborn with a lovely name!

backtobusy · 13/04/2022 12:24

Your friend was being very rude.
The only place to be honest about dc's names is the baby board.
Other than that you just say "how lovely" regardless of what you actually think.

JeffThePilot · 13/04/2022 12:24

It’s a name that suits all ages. But even if it wasn’t, she was completely rude in how she spoke to you about it.


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romdowa · 13/04/2022 12:26

Jack wouldn't be my choice but it's a lovely name . People don't like my babies name either but that's their problem. I love it, as does my dp and anyone who shares their dislike of it , is told pretty quick what they can do with their opinion

Sally872 · 13/04/2022 12:27

Lovely name choice.

I have no idea how your friend gets through any week without offending someone if she is so thoughtless. If not a close friend I would laugh it off and think about what else she says to people. If a closer friend I would mention it was rude.

MsTSwift · 13/04/2022 12:27

What is wrong with her?’ Even if you think the name is hideous or super dull you lie and say “how lovely” to a new parent.

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