Threads

See more results

Topics

Usernames

Mumsnet Logo
Please
or
to access all these features

Being annoyed by friend judging name choices
109

87beck · 13/04/2022 11:50

Our second son was born a few weeks ago and we decided to name him Jack

My friend met him for the first time yesterday and decided to inform me that her DH has commented that if they ever have a boy, jack would've been the last name on their list as it's associated with bad behaved boys etc and it's just not "a cool name" & also said that my first boys name isn't cool and why do we go for such simplistic names ..?

It might just be the postpartum hormones but I'm soooo angry she decided to share this with me .. wtf !
I Didn't say anything but my DH said next time he will see them he will mention the unnecessary comment.
I would never judge anyone's name choices so I'm super angry that behind close doors they bitch about my boys names 🥲 not in a rush to meet up with her again

OP's posts:
Please
or
to access all these features

ellenpartridge · 13/04/2022 14:25

Your "friend" is being a cow. She's been really rude for no reason and I wonder if she's somehow jealous or bitter for some reason as this isn't normal behaviour at all!

Also agree there's nothing at all wrong with Jack. Perfectly nice normal classic name. Probably much nicer than her "cool" names

Please
or
to access all these features

MrsWinters · 13/04/2022 14:26

I always judge peoples name choices, but I do it behind their backs.
From the anonymity of the internet I’ll give you the truth. Jack is a lovely name.

Please
or
to access all these features

EV117 · 13/04/2022 14:27

She sounds like a dick.

Please
or
to access all these features

ExConstance · 13/04/2022 14:27

I have a Jack DS1, he went to Oxford and has a very high up job (unlike me) When he was born it was quite an unusual name.

Please
or
to access all these features

Sidisawetlettuce · 13/04/2022 14:31

@Womeninblack

Just leave it.
It was a careless comment and she probably said it without thinking. No need to make it a big thing

It wasn't careless. It was spiteful.
Please
or
to access all these features

ExplodingCarrots · 13/04/2022 14:31

Does she have children OP? She sounds awfully bitter and possibly jealous and this is her way of punishing you . No friend would say something like this unless something is going on with them.

Please
or
to access all these features

tearinghairout · 13/04/2022 14:36

What a horrible and unnecessary comment. It's extremely poor form to make a comment like that. We all have weird prejudices about names and may well share them before the baby's arrival, but to say this now is very rude and childish. I would agree that there is something going on, jealousy maybe.

Please
or
to access all these features

MyEasterEggs · 13/04/2022 14:44

Bitter. Jealous. Unkind. None of the traits I’d want in a “friend”. What an asshat. If she has an ounce of sense she’ll be feeling awkward about that needless comment. Jack is a beautiful name!

Please
or
to access all these features

XelaM · 13/04/2022 14:49

Jack is a great classic name and much better than the more "unique" names people give their kids these days

Please
or
to access all these features

Gonnabegrandma · 13/04/2022 14:49

Jack is my favourite boys name . Only couldn’t use it as Jack is part of my surname now . Ignore idiot rude friend . Enjoy your boys

Please
or
to access all these features

Katela18 · 13/04/2022 15:00

My husband is called Jack.

Funnily enough, his mum says when he was born 30 years ago, she got lots of comments then too! Very strange as I always thought it was a fairly popular name.

For what it's worth, he's grown into the most loving, supportive husband, best dad and also very successful and driven in his career....far from these judgements around the name.

Enjoy your baby and ignore these comments, completely unnecessary.

Please
or
to access all these features

Nillynally · 13/04/2022 15:03

Jack's a lovely boys name! She's a twat. Ignore her.

Please
or
to access all these features

JustSaying101 · 13/04/2022 15:26

Is your friend generally quite a tactless person, or is this a new thing? Either way, it's not a nice thing to say - rise above and ignore. Wishing you all the best with your new arrival.

Please
or
to access all these features

Tillerman · 13/04/2022 15:29

It’s just a timeless name really like James or Oliver. I can’t see it going out of fashion, it’s a nice normal name. I don’t think it’s associated with naughty boys, Jackson maybe but not Jack on its own.

Please
or
to access all these features

BeaLola · 13/04/2022 15:36

Lovely name and congrats on baby

She is either thoughtless to repeat this or being nasty by deliberately saying it.

Tbh I haven't RTFT but does she have children ? If so what did he'd and her DH choose ?

Next time you see him I would thank him for his comments and that baby Jack doesn't care for his band either but is too polite to say !

Please
or
to access all these features

Beautifulmonster87 · 13/04/2022 15:49

Really rude.
I love the name Jack.. have associated it with naughty boys but I don’t care and would have used it if my husbands ex step dad wasn’t called Jack who he hated!
My boy is called Samuel, Sammy for short… my dad said ‘oh good as I don’t like Samuel’ oh thanks… that’s his name ffs! People are bell ends sometimes. Rise above it.

Please
or
to access all these features

Topseyt · 13/04/2022 17:52

This woman is not your friend. Back away from her and let the "friendship" die off. If she asks why then tell her bluntly.

There is nothing wrong with the name Jack. If we had had a boy then I might well have considered it. It is a strong, classic name that doesn't date.

Please
or
to access all these features

87beck · 13/04/2022 19:04

Thank you everyone! Making me love his name even more!

Yes she has a little girl with a very unusual not boring name & it really hurts me as even though her name choice wouldn't have made it to our list .. I've never said a bad thing about it.. not even thought anything negative .. so the thought of them two bitching about my childrens names makes my blood boil. I can imagine them laughing ..

She's known for making mean comments and thinking her way is the only way but I never paid too much attention as it was never directed at me.

Anyway thanks everyone! Hope you all have a lovely evening xx

OP's posts:
Please
or
to access all these features

TootsAtOwls · 13/04/2022 19:31

I bet she actually has Jack on her list of favourite names and she's trying to convince you not to use it so she'll be able to in future 😆

Please
or
to access all these features

EV117 · 13/04/2022 21:02

For what it’s worth, Jack is a lovely timeless name - although I think that’s been made clear. But it could have been any name, even a genuinely ‘boring’ one, you’re friends comments would have still been really shit. I’d want nothing to do with a person who behaves that way.

Please
or
to access all these features

FabianaUteda · 22/04/2022 08:08

First I would say, Jack is a lovely name and it means "God is gracious". I even love the way it sounds, it doesn't feel negative, or "misbehaved" it just feels kind of musical.

Second I would suggest that if you go on to have another child and it is a girl, don't give her your "friend" name. It obviously means "badly behaved". Personally, I would've shown her the door and told her not to come back because I wouldn't want badly behaved and self-entitled people to be a negative influence on my children. And no. I am not postpartum hormone influenced, so I don't have that "excuse/justification". I am just a hot-blooded Latina that is very protective of those she loves and has no time for negative and jealous/envious people that haven't got any kind, or loving things to offer to others. I am also old, so maybe that is my "excuse/justification?.

Thumper's mum put it best;
"If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all"!!!!!

Please
or
to access all these features

MrsDamonSalvatore · 22/04/2022 09:10

Your ‘friend’ is a rude cow. Jack is a perfectly good name, so I don’t know what she’s on about. Even if it was Ebeneezer-Adolf or something equally obscure, she’d be rude to slag it off. You say she’s known for making mean comments…why not call her out on it or just distance yourself from her bitchiness?

Please
or
to access all these features

Nickpeacock36 · 23/04/2022 01:02

I’m boiling my blood! My son is called JACK and he is the kindest lad. Your ex mate if I saw her would get a big thump on the nose the rude rude nasty mean disgusting person. You be proud of the name jack it’s the most beautiful boys name a very strong and sturdy name.

I truly hope your ex friend has karma - absolute mean bixxh I would have throttled her in the spot

Please
or
to access all these features

safclass · 23/04/2022 01:07

I was an infant teacher for nearly 20yrs and had several Jacks through my class. I can honestly say ALL if them have been lovely lads, yes some were 'cheeky chappies' but none were unlikeable kids. I love the name. (2 teachers saying the same thing (pp) and we are REALLY fussy on naming children)

Please
or
to access all these features

Kite22 · 23/04/2022 01:16

Aside from the fact that I think Jack is a lovely name, and it certainly doesn't have any of those associations, she was being extremely rude.

YWBU not to call her out on that when she started being so rude.
YANBU to be annoyed with her.

Please
or
to access all these features
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.