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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I hate dummies !!!

327 replies

EsmeDavina · 11/04/2022 17:07

I have a real hatred for toddlers with dummies! It actually irks me so much.

I totally get there is a time and place for dummies to soothe and settle babies.

My own son had a dummy as a newborn but I took it off him/he gave it up at around 6 months.

I could not bear for him to be one of these children you see with a dummy you cannot part them from.

My friends children his age still have dummies and every photograph you see of them they have this unsightly thing plugged in their mouths.

Even when we are out, they are given the dummy for no reason. Not upset, not settling to sleep just automatically put in the mouth.

I never used to have such a thing about dummies until I became a mum and I don't know why they annoy me so much 😂 !!

I know it's stupid because they aren't my children however does it bother anyone else as much ?

OP posts:
QuiltedHippo · 11/04/2022 20:31

Never used one here, I assumed it was more of a 50/50 thing but every other baby I know uses them. There must be a reason, kind of wish I'd tried!

I do get a bit annoyed when those who don't BF have made snide comments about feeding again, they're only doing for comfort etc. When by using a dummy theyre just putting a plastic version of a nipple into their babys mouth. But that's my own irk.

MrsSugar · 11/04/2022 20:37

Why do you even care so much !
Makes no difference to you. Surely you have better things to be bothering urself with.

IDontLikeMondays88 · 11/04/2022 20:38

YABU you should mind your own business

TheGlitterati · 11/04/2022 20:40

Yes. I think they’re gross. Never used one and only would if a medical need, E.g reflux.

BeautifulBirds · 11/04/2022 20:41

Yeah, cos we don't have enough mum guilt already!

Wish I hadn't read this.

MillenialInDenial · 11/04/2022 20:43

I couldn't imagine disliking a child for a dummy.
As an adult I look past minuscule things like that there could be so many reasons, my eldest 'lost' his dummy around 9 months, 2nd child still sleeps with a blanket he's had since birth won't part with it is almost 7, every child is different and anything to make them feel comfortable and safe is the most important thing to me.
There is a child in my sons class who has a dummy it settles her when she has a sensory overload so maybe I'm just more aware of my surroundings and other peoples lives than you are.

wingingit987 · 11/04/2022 20:43

I'm a dental nurse

I was convinced none of my children would never have dummies..... however we can't all be perfect!

Toddler got rid of his at 2 and as long as the baby's is gone by 3 I don't care.

There's things far worse

Mummaneedsadrink · 11/04/2022 20:44

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Glamora · 11/04/2022 20:45

Well don't use one then

GettingThere22 · 11/04/2022 20:48

Why do people have so much time on their hands that they can judge over a dummy?

It's rude to stare i know that but never heard its rude to have a dummy, yet people constantly stare and mutter about my child who has sen and a dummy. To see that behaviour in an adult is far worse

ldontWanna · 11/04/2022 20:50

@TheGlitterati

Yes. I think they’re gross. Never used one and only would if a medical need, E.g reflux.
What exactly is gross about them? Can you explain?
excelledyourself · 11/04/2022 21:04

My DS was bottle-fed, had a dummy until he was 3, and had a bedtime comforter (t-shirt of mine) until he was about 11. I'm surprised I've been allowed to keep him all 17 years.

AchillesPoirot · 11/04/2022 21:06

Can someone define medical need please

37TTCLeeds · 11/04/2022 21:10

Maybe just try saving your judgement...

babywalker56 · 11/04/2022 21:18

I never used a dummy with DD because I didn’t want to go through the process of taking it off of her.

Sometimes I might see a toddler with a dummy and think ‘aren’t they a bit old for that’ but I really don’t know what’s going on. The parents could only give the dummy for a set amount of time a day, they could be weaning them off of the dummy. There’s just so many reasons and it’s really not my business. It certainly doesn’t bother me at all

TheGlitterati · 11/04/2022 21:25

@ldontWanna plastic rubbish shoved in a child’s mouth to keep them quiet is my entire experience of them. Everyone I personally know who used one literally remove the bottle and plug in the dummy.

CoffeeWithCheese · 11/04/2022 21:26

My eldest had one until about age 1 - she was premature and it helped build up her suck reflex. No speech issues (apart from that she never shuts up) - indeed her speech was so advanced the staff at the children's centre used to be amazed (and bemused) by the stuff she came out with.

Youngest didn't have one - wish she would have had as she was a refluxer and it might have helped a bit. She's the one who had fairly significant speech issues. Instead she went through a long period of sucking on those disembodied heads stuck to blankets to get to sleep.

I would have taken a dummy that could be rotated and sterilised over Very Stinky Giraffe any day to be fair - however many times you washed him - he was ewwww.

Thedogscollar · 11/04/2022 21:29

@EsmeDavina

And as most of the people posting saying I'm being judgemental are missing is as I said 'there is a time and a place'

It's not being judgemental it's an opinion/dislike.

Of all the things happening in this world right now you choose to whine about your dislike of a dummy/pacifier call it what you want.

Seriously?? You said there is a time and a place. Well it isn't now and it isn't on Mumsnet.

hangrylady · 11/04/2022 21:30

I honestly don't understand why you give a flying fuck if a child that's not yours has a dummy. Maybe try getting wound up about something that matters and get over yourself.

AchillesPoirot · 11/04/2022 21:30

I didn’t know dd had SN when she had her dummy

caringcarer · 11/04/2022 21:43

None of my children were given a dummy. I think they are dreadful things. All mine did fine without. I think it actually delays speech. They can't babble as much if the dreadful dummy always in its mouth. I don't know why people use them especially with children almost 5 who I sometimes see with them stuck in their mouths.

yaboreme · 11/04/2022 21:47

@hangrylady agreed.

This thread is hilarious!

Blaggertyjibbet · 11/04/2022 21:53

YABU. Better a dummy that you can take away at 2 years old than a prolonged finger sucking habit that can really mess with their teeth.

BourbonVanilla · 11/04/2022 21:57

Perhaps you should mind your own business.

NatriumChloride · 11/04/2022 22:01

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