To ask what you’re doing awake post-midnight? Part 3: Return of the Insomnia

[5YearsLeft]

Hey all - We’ve made it to the third thread. Whether you’ve posted before or you’re brand new, if you’re stuck awake, then you’re welcome here. We’ve had people facing it all on the last few threads: grief (loss of DPs, DHs, parents, children, and pets), illness of every sort (cancer, COVID, post COVID, sciatica, antidepressant withdrawals, stomach bugs of every sort, cold/flu, autoimmune problems, and even more diagnoses), ill children and partners (vomiting, crying, unable to sleep… and that’s just the adult family members! Ok I’m kidding, that was mostly the kids), women in labor, women with surgery fears, fears of all other sizes, anxiety, work anxiety, and of course insomnia caused by myriad things (LOTS of peri and postmenopausal insomnia).

Whatever is keeping you awake, you’re always welcome to share it here.

If you’re following in from our last thread, it’s:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4473171-To-ask-what-you-re-doing-awake-post-midnight-Part-2-Insomnia-Strikes-Back

Hello and welcome to yet another episode of the after midnight thread. I just typed up the entire post and my post got eaten. I posted early last night and then managed to fall asleep for the entire night so I missed everyone’s posts, but please know that you are welcome and I’ll try to catch up.

The night can be so difficult because it feels like a bigger place with the things that were with you during the day and sort of attacked you, whether that’s a pain, illness, stress, worry of all sorts, or all the other things that can lead to insomnia. Or there’s just the insomnia itself. If you’re awake for whatever reason, you need somewhere to be and to get it off your chest, you’re always very welcome here. It can make the things that grow bigger at night feel a little smaller and less heavy.

@Wallywobbles It’s great to see you here, but I’m sorry to hear that lambing season is taking so much out of you. I know it’s been a rough one so far so I hope that it’s just normal tiring things that are happening now.

@emotionalpuddle Just keep on keeping on. It’s terrible right now, I know, but you’ll get through this and one day you’ll be happy again and he’ll hopefully have scurvy.

I went to bed so early today but I've got so much going through my mind
So distressing

I've been so tired after the last bout of chemo, but the Good news is that means I've been getting plenty of sleep. Dirty stop out DCat has refused to come in at night for the past week, so no night time cuddles and reassuring purring (I find the sound of a cat purring in the dark very soothing!). Is it coincidence do you think that the weather for the past week has been dry and reasonably warm and tonight its windy and raining?! Said DCat has managed to pull a corner of the duvet aside at the foot of the bed and is curled up on the sheet. I have an electric blanket under the sheet which provides extra warmth for your feet. Is that coincidence too ?

Awww my cats are next to me too

@purpleme12 I’m so sorry that life things are robbing you of your sleep. I’m so glad you have your cats! But I know that they don’t erase the worry. But sometimes its just nice to have a fuzzy someone to support you.

@Confusedmeanderings Ha! That cat knows which side his bread is buttered on! Silly thing. But I’m sorry you’re so tired; of course it’s normal with what you’re going through. Even with all the sleep, it can be a bone-deep tired. I hope the cat purring helps out!

I’m struggling tonight because I’ve had a row with someone and, although in the great scheme of things it doesn’t really matter, it still feels like I’ve created unnecessary stress for myself. I’m 99% sure I’m in the right, but it feels like cold comfort at the moment. Sometimes I’d like to be the kind of person who can just avoid the argument in the first place.

@5YearsLeft thank you for you concern. Lambing is over - now it's just making sure they are fed and thriving.

It's my real job that's taking my time now. I teach at university and business schools. Financially we've had a few tough year so I've accepted every contract. The end result is I work a stupidly large number of hours. 7/7 when you add in preparation and marking. Some of my classes are 60+ students.

I've also been retraining as an instructional designer which I love. I've gone for a pretty major role so fingers crossed. It would mean being remote which would add a couple of hours to my day. Currently I commute to an hour away.

How are you doing?

@WomanStanleyWoman Soeey about your row! And I know what you mean. I wish I could just let things go and not argue about them, but I don’t seem to have that super relaxed ability. Maybe you don’t either? Still, you’re only human, and nobody feels good after an argument. I hope it gets resolved.

@Wallywobbles Wow! That’s quite a lot of stuff going on there! I can understand that it’s not all choice though; as you say, it been a rough few years, and I’m sure even more so for those with professions that can be very up and down like farming. As for me, I have some good personal news.. and maybe some bad news for the thread

Oh why what's happened?

Hello all and welcome to another and maybe one of the last of the after-midnight threads. I’ll still be running them daily until next Monday (the 11th). As it happens, I’ve been offered a job remotely doing a few hours of writing a day. I don’t know if I’m going to be well enough to do it, but I could really, really use the money, so I really have to try. As a result, I’m going to have to try to start keeping “normal” hours, as right now when I can’t sleep at night from the pain, my body relies on making up that sleep during the day, so I’ve never pushed it. I have a doctor’s appointment next Wednesday with my neurologist and I’m sure she’ll be very supportive about trying to get me on regular sleep hours, ha, so… yes. I’ll still be posting updates on my other MN thread (during daytime hours) and I’ll be on Instagram, but I’ll just hopefully be asleep during nighttime hours.

BUT as for tonight - if you’re dealing with all the things that follow you to bed and stop you from sleeping when you desperately want to, then this thread is the place for you. You’re welcome here as a place to share. I can’t guarantee anyone will respond immediately, but please now that you’re being heard by people who understand, and who’ve been where you are, no matter what you’re dealing with. You can set down the burden here, just for a little bit, and hopefully you’ll be more able to find rest.

Well I'm really happy that you've got a job writing @5YearsLeft 🙃

Back again! Suspect I'll be up all night. Was feeling pretty good all day, only had one wobble. Now sat in tears at the cruelty of DP/?ExDP. He's like a different person. I've put a film on and curled up with the dog in bed, he's my only saving grace.

@purpleme12 I’m thrilled about the idea of a job. I spend a lot of time in bed reading books (when I’m not falling out or having a huge headache, ha), and I really need something to make me feel some self-worth. But of course, I hate the thought of there not being a thread here for all of you! Maybe I can make it a “exhausted” luncheon thread instead, ha. I do hope things keep getting better for you. They just have to, because you deserve it.

@emotionalpuddle This is definitely how it goes at the beginning. First the days and nights are both awful. Then you can get through the days, but the nights still aren’t for shite, and then slowly the nights get a bit better. You’re absolutely allowed to feel this way because he IS cruel, and what he’s done is cruel. A film with the dog sounds like a nice, lovely idea, and with a companion who is 100% better than your xDP in every way: loving, dependable, loyal.

He really is, my dog is clearly my one true love he'd never hurt me like this

@emotionalpuddle I’m so glad you have him!

Awake as my 5 yo has chicken pox, he’s in bed with me and coughing a lot! Only had one day of it so far….worried we are in for a rough few days!

@flower277 Oh gosh, that’s tough! And only the first day. I haven’t usually heard of a cough with chicken pox? Do keep an eye out, perhaps, because maybe it’s sign that they’re in his throat (when I got them as a child, I had them really mild on my skin, but I kept telling Gran my throat hurt and she looked and I just had them something awful in my throat, ha).

@5YearsLeft you are such a lovely person

Our lovely dog is being out to sleep tomorrow and he's cuddled into my leg, I don't want to go to sleep because this is the last time

Oh my gosh I'm so sorry that's heartbreaking 💔💔💔

@ifyouturnonthelight I’m so sorry; that is a really tough thing in life. We have pets and they trust us to make these decisions for them so that, as much as we wish we could have second possible with them, they don’t have to suffer when the time comes. You’re being a great owner and very, very brave to help him know it’s time for him to go to the next place. I like to believe that he’ll be waiting there for you and, because an afterlife for dogs should be kind, he won’t feel like any time has passed at all. So we’re just the ones who have to handle missing our pets, which can be just an awful feeling, until we hopefully see them again. I’m so sorry you’re going through this, but it’s good that he’s having a nice, cosy last night with you.

[quote purpleme12]@5YearsLeft you are such a lovely person[/quote]
I agree This is a very kind thread.

@5YearsLeft thank you xx

Hello all and welcome to the after-midnight thread. If you’re awake with the kind of things that mentally and psychologically go bump in the night - pain, worry, anxiety, illness, illnesses of your children or DH, stress about life or work, overthinking, overworking, and all the various types of insomnia - then this is the thread for you. You’re welcome here: just lay down your troubles and you can hopefully rest a while.

As of Monday, I probably won’t be able to do this thread anymore as I have to try to find some way to “force” my body on a sleep schedule, even with the pain, probably with the help of my doctor. For those I haven’t seen yet, including @Tallisimo, @Coroico97, @jowly (who I’ve not seen for ages but was here at the beginning), @MrsGlum, @AlmostAlwyn, and I’m sure so many others I’m not thinking of right now, I just wanted to let you know and say you’ve all been so, so great, and I’ll be on my other thread (occasionally) and probably Instagram.

@5YearsLeft congratulations on your job! You are going to be sorely missed on here. Your kindness, wisdom and insight have certainly kept me going through many a long dark worrisome and sleepless night recently!
Thank you for all the support you’ve given me and many others. It’s really comforting when you feel like your world is imploding and everyone else is asleep, to know that you and all the lovely posters on here are around for support, encouragement and kindness.
Xxx