Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sex with someone 20yrs younger would you do it?

153 replies

fruityloopy · 22/03/2022 15:22

I’m a single 48yr old Mum of one.. I’ve been propositioned by a guy who I’ve chatted to a few times in the pub. I’m not entirely sure how old he is but probably late 20’s maybe 30.
I’m not after a relationship but just wondering am I unreasonable (or completely mad!) to consider it?

OP posts:
JaceLancs · 22/03/2022 21:54

I would - I’m 57 so if any 37 year old men showed an interest in me I wouldn’t see a problem

D0lphine · 22/03/2022 21:56

No it would be illegal!

But I think it's fine provided the younger person is of legal age. 20 year old man with a 40 year old woman - no issue there! Same at 30/50, 40/60.

Xpologog · 22/03/2022 22:21

I’d seriously find that icky. At any age. Don’t know why, just would.

ZippeeDeeDoohDah · 22/03/2022 22:43

In my case no, but because 20 years younger is a teenager!
In general, over the age of roughly around 23-25, I think age becomes increasingly irrelevant, so why not in your circumstances?

thepeopleversuswork · 22/03/2022 23:35

For a shag or two yes. Wouldn’t want to be in a relationship with a man in his 20s.

Zerrin13 · 23/03/2022 00:19

I'm 56 so hell yes!

MrsBerthaRochester · 23/03/2022 00:51

I used to have a fb who was 23 to my 43(although he intially lied about his age). It was fun for a while but I ended it when he admitted he had seen me in a pub but didnt say hi as was with pals and embarassed.
Prefer younger guys but wouldnt go that young again.

Boxowine · 23/03/2022 01:20

Sure. Have some fun.

Luredbyapomegranate · 23/03/2022 01:21

Sure, no reason not to.

Rawmum30 · 23/03/2022 02:10

Why all the focus on age?
If potential guy is attracted you and you feel the same, then why would you consider age (either side of your own) a barrier.
Fwiw, just over twenty years ago I met a guy I became just mates with.
He was easy to talk to, and despite him being eighteen years younger (as I discovered later) he displayed a maturity that made conversation easy.
However, his enthusiasm for life, fun and adventure was refreshing after having had past “relationships” that quickly became non events, as those males who were of a similar age to me, quickly seemed to settle into a routine where they just didn’t bother to win me over, so to speak, once the first flush of meeting/dates were over….
However, although I had no expectations of my friendship with the younger guy, a couple of years later, we were yakking away as per usual, and it seemed, all of a sudden, I was in his arms and kissing!
My dc was roughly ten years younger, but had already left home…. but honestly, I was told, “mum, if you are happy, then don’t worry, coz I wouldn’t want you telling me who I could go out with”.
Said guy is still (very much) in my life. A lot of years later, he moved in with me.
We are both so happy, and there’s hardly a day goes by without him causing me to crack up with laughter.
He feels that our maturities have “met up in the middle”, and we have so much to offer each other from our individual life experiences.
I’m not saying one should purposefully seek out an age difference relationship, but certainly don’t dismiss the opportunity of a match made in heaven, simply coz you won’t be conforming to the usual age gap.
Btw, his mum is slightly older than me, and despite my trepidation of finally meeting her, she’s great, and we occasionally go out for the day with each other.
Although it shouldn’t matter anyway, we have been lucky that both of our families have never uttered any disapproval….
Go with the flow, and stay aware…. Just as you would in any blossoming friendship or relationship.
xx

GarlandsinGreece · 23/03/2022 02:18

Hard no. I’m 44 and 24-year-old men seem like boys to me.

drpet49 · 23/03/2022 02:20

No, too big an age gap and feels icky

Pyewhacket · 23/03/2022 03:26

I’d want to ensure he wasn’t play games of some sort. But if he just wanted the sexual experience of an older woman then I can’t see the harm. Just be careful you don’t get too emotionally involved.

moretrumpetplease · 23/03/2022 03:39

@ArmWrestlingWithChasNDave "late twenties" is probably 28+, not THIRTEEN, behave

moretrumpetplease · 23/03/2022 03:41

P.s @fruityloopy I'd definitely go for it - there's 12 years between me and me the man who is currently "entertaining" me

StarlightLady · 23/03/2022 06:03

Yep!

Early 40s, been there, done that, got several T-shirts and wear them with pride. It’s about passion, chemistry and that little ooh feeling inside.

Just ensure you can control your emotions and have fun, fun, fun!

upupandawaytoday · 23/03/2022 06:24

I had a brief fling with someone 16 years younger ... was a lot of fun!

But yes the emotional side of things can be a bit shit. I knew it would be just a fling, I made it very clear but it was still sad as we had a lot of chemistry.

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 23/03/2022 07:34

I've recently said no to a 25 year old so 21 years younger than me. He is 2 years younger than my eldest son though

burnoutbabe · 23/03/2022 08:06

I regularly go out drinking with men 20 years younger - work colleagues or fellow students so I wouldn't have an issue with it (bar I gave a partner!) but then I have no kids so I have no "your sane age as my kid" type thoughts.

Jody21 · 23/03/2022 09:08

No way! I had my eldest when I was 21 so having sex with someone the same age as my child and their friends would just be repulsive to me! Surely there are men out there closer to your own age that you might actually have something in common with?

PenguinPup · 23/03/2022 09:18

@Jody21 I don't think the OP wants to have a relationship with him, so it doesn't matter if they have nothing in common. She just wants him for his 28 year old body... lucky lady to have the option!

daisyjgrey · 23/03/2022 09:48

They'd be 14, so no.

I wouldn't date/sleep with someone younger than me generally though; not at the age I am anyway.

Sisisimone · 23/03/2022 09:58

Surely there are men out there closer to your own age that you might actually have something in common with?
It's so pathetic to think you can only have things in common with people your own age. Some people must live such blinkered and sheltered lives

Donra · 23/03/2022 10:06

I would totally do it if I had the chance. Just for fun, it obviously wouldn’t be a serious long term relationship.

Onlyforcake · 23/03/2022 10:11

No, you don't know his age Grin. I'm all for casual flings but I do like to know a bit of info about someone. I also really get the ick outside the half your age plus 7 thing. For me I'd struggle with a decade either way, I'm in my late 40s as well.

Swipe left for the next trending thread