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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Sex with someone 20yrs younger would you do it?

153 replies

fruityloopy · 22/03/2022 15:22

I’m a single 48yr old Mum of one.. I’ve been propositioned by a guy who I’ve chatted to a few times in the pub. I’m not entirely sure how old he is but probably late 20’s maybe 30.
I’m not after a relationship but just wondering am I unreasonable (or completely mad!) to consider it?

OP posts:
mamabr · 22/03/2022 17:19

@GahAndTheBear

No. I couldn’t. I’m only 19 years older than my eldest son though, which is definitely a factor in my thoughts on this.

That said, lots of men think nothing of shagging women as young as or younger than their daughters.

Oh don't even, I found out after I first slept with my baby's father (he's 20 yrs older) that his first daughter (he had at 17) is actually older than me😳. Me being me at the time I didn't care, now looking back I find it very weird!
winemonster · 22/03/2022 17:24

Yes. My partner has just turned 26 and I’m 44. Works for us Grin

PinkGinBigGrin · 22/03/2022 17:27

No because I have a son the same age and I just couldn't go there - I'd be thinking of them as someone's son rather than a man in their own right!

But it's legal, so you do you OP!

Momijin · 22/03/2022 17:27

I think it is creepy AF.

SleepingStandingUp · 22/03/2022 17:36

Yes, you're OK to have sex with a consenting adult.

HTh.

monsterflake · 22/03/2022 17:39

They would be 13 so no, obviously.

However if I were 40+ I would, why not!

Bedsheets4knickers · 22/03/2022 17:41

@SNUG2022

Only in the dark
🤣
Lime37 · 22/03/2022 17:43

I wouldn’t because it would be rape. But in my mid 40’s definitely

Loveagingernut · 22/03/2022 17:46

It’s been that long, I wouldn’t know what to do with him

VampireMoney · 22/03/2022 17:50

My current fwb is 19 years younger than me, so yea, I would!

LittleMisfortune · 22/03/2022 17:51

At the moment I wouldn't as they'd be 8 Grin

However if it's between two consenting adults then go for it. Sometimes sex can just be a bit of fun.

millytint44 · 22/03/2022 17:56

I'm your age. Wouldn't even think twice about it if I fancied him and he seemed keen on me too!

If you're not fussed on him yourself, send him round to mine!!!

HRTQueen · 22/03/2022 18:01

No

I’m around enough men in the 20/early 30’s I don’t find them attractive at all (I can see they are)

I don’t want to be the older lover either I find it an absolute turn off

Sofiegiraffe · 22/03/2022 18:03

No definitely not, because they would be only 16 in my case. 10 years younger though, around 26? Yeah I totally would if I was single and attracted to them!

LadyCordeliaFitzgerald · 22/03/2022 18:09

Not for me. I’m not attracted to younger men, but then I never was. I’ve always found men in their 40s attractive. It’s highly probable that I still will when I’m in my sixties though.

BearimyJeremy · 22/03/2022 18:09

I certainly did when I was online dating years back although I was having fun not planning to live together. I probably wouldn't again because younger men aren't as emotionally resilient in my experience but that could have been down to personalities and I see other posters have had lads who were fine about things being casual. Late twenties really isn't that "young" anyway.

Lipsandlashes · 22/03/2022 18:09

I’m married and love DH v much, so no but if I was single then definitely! I’m sure it would be pretty amazing! Go for it OP

Mabelface · 22/03/2022 18:20

Oh god yes! I had a couple of dalliances with a 26 year old when I was 46. It was purely for fun and I had a great time.

SmellyWellyWoo · 22/03/2022 18:22

Nothing wrong with it but not for me. I just don't find men that age sexually attractive.

MangyInseam · 22/03/2022 18:25

No, but I would not necessarily object to sex with someone 20 years older.

Trinity69 · 22/03/2022 18:30

Been there, done it, thoroughly did not enjoy, mainly because it was as awkward as I'd told him it would be! I felt very weird, because I'd known him for a good few years. He was proper fit though so had to give it a go! 🤣

halfsiesonapotnoodle · 22/03/2022 18:35

@Halllyup17

Now imagine an almost 50 year old bloke asking if it's ok to sleep with a woman in her 20s.

You'd all be horrified.

Why? That's 2 consenting adults for goodness sake. When I was 25 I had a fantastic sexual relationship with a 52 year old man. Still great friends 25 years later.
halfsiesonapotnoodle · 22/03/2022 18:37

@LynetteScavo

I think half your age plus 7 is a good minimum standard, so he'd have to be at least 31.
This is the kind of thing 13 year olds come up with. Complete tripe. Confused
Furrydogmum · 22/03/2022 18:45

No, they would be too close to my sons ages which would seem icky to me.

Redcrayons · 22/03/2022 18:49

Yes, im 50, so they wouldn’t be indecently young or anywhere close to the age of my DCs.