Is this just a generational thing or are DH and I really meek/pushover parents. Both my mum and PIL have recently separately said our 6mo is 'in charge' and 'rules the house'. My mum said to the baby (with me well within earshot) "you're not in charge, mummy is. Mummy's the one who needs to be in charge". She hasn't said anything to my face. Whereas PIL outright said "How can something so tiny totally rule the household".
I'd say we are on the attachment parenting side but not totally. We have recently sleep trained to get DD in her big cot. But we make heavy use of the sling round the house as DD doesn't like to be put down. We carry her a lot as she doesn't like sitting in laps. We co slept from 3m - 6m as it was the best way to maximise sleep for everyone, it then stopped working so well recently hence the move to her own room. She is generally a fussy/high needs baby so taking her round to their houses involves a lot of carrying, entertaining, jiggling etc. and inevitable fussiness. I am doing some BLW as well as cooking all her food from scratch, my MIL often expresses incredulity/amazement at this. Finally I breastfed until 6m so would often need to take baby out the room multiple times during visits for feeds as she was a noisy/fussy feeder. She fed little and often. Cue surprise at how often she needed feeds, 'she can't be hungry she only just fed'.
I feel we have just been responsive and focused on meeting DD's needs in a gentle loving way, but now I am doubting myself a bit and wondering if we should have been putting her down more, letting her fuss a bit more in order to get used to it. She still hates being left alone when I need the loo and screams being put down for naps etc, have we made her this way? It's the separate comments from both sides... clearly we come off as pushovers.