I know I'm not aibu to say wake the fuck up mn

[Muppetlove]

So many times I've seen people reply to first time posters apparently talking about their teenagers having sick, periods or even sometimes talking about issues with younger kids. Mumsnet make it too easy for people to get their sick jollies on here. I can't change mumsnet but I can say some of you are way too naive about the anonymity on mumsnet and unless you want to contribute to sickos getting their rocks off on your posts, sometimes about your own children start being a bit wiser please!

If you are replying to a thread with sicko potential please take a minute to do a quick search to make sure this is a regular poster or at least someone who has referred to name changing. It's your responsibility to help protect our kids, stop either trusting others like previous posters or mumsmey to do that

Very true, @Brefugee, very true.

How do you check their other posts?

Absolutely lol-ing at the year of joining. All those people who start threads with
"I've nc'd for this, but naice ham, penis beaker, etc" either wouldn't need to, or be busted!

There are corporal punishment/ smacking trolls too. Eliciting stories about school and what happened to posters when they were children.

Agree re taking a step back and thinking before sharing something personal in response to threads. Especially about your children.

Would your teenage daughter appreciate her bra size, choice of underwear, difficulty with heavy periods or whatever being shared online? Or should she be able to trust that this is stuff you are aware of /she has told you in confidence?

Saying 'namechanged for this' proves absolutely nothing. And adding in 'naice ham' and 'Pom bears' as some kind of proof...

@RisingMoon

Plus you then get a weird hierarchy of who posts the most.

This would not be a good thing.

Yeah let's not have that. I suspect one of the reasons MN keeps going while other forums inevitably wither and die is that we don't have post count and join date hierarchy nonsense. I've been on various forums over the years and that stuff massively influences a community.

It's good that if you make a fool of yourself here you can just change your name and start again.

How about 👹 for a troll?

@PeacefulPrune

How do you check their other posts?

Use the search function at the top of the page.

I'd welcome the end of the "naice ham, penis beaker, penguin bollard, lemon drizzle etc." passport myself!

Actually, on reflection year of joining or number of posts are not great ideas and would put off genuine new posters.

Don't forget, all those emojis are only available if you're using MN on a mobile! On a desktop/laptop we're stuck with the 'old' ones.

... which is why is often used, along with !

I just think people need to engage their brains.
I mean would you tell a room full of people about the time you shat yourself? Or ask them to share similar experiences?
Would you tell a bunch of randoms about your teen daughters heavy periods?
And that's before you even get on to the perve angle
Not everything needs to be shared beyond discussion with professionals

@HomeHomeInTheRange

There are corporal punishment/ smacking trolls too. Eliciting stories about school and what happened to posters when they were children.

Yes, these type of posts. Gross.

And also a vaginal rejuvenation troll made a flurry of posts at one time.

Still, plimsoll troll wins for the oddest troll - and always getting a discussion going about plimsolls on every thread. Because plimsolls are a seemingly benign topic. Until they aren’t.

Absolutely @Hobnobswantshernameback

@ParanoidGynodroid

But how would anyone see those together, *@MrsRobinsonsHandprints*? Unless a poster did a swift NC and posted alongside another of their own posts with a different name.

The "Member since xxxx" is fairly common on various forums.

I know that lots of people have several names on the go at anyone time. I do.

I suspect one of the reasons MN keeps going while other forums inevitably wither and die is that we don't have post count and join date hierarchy nonsense. I've been on various forums over the years and that stuff massively influences a community.

It's good that if you make a fool of yourself here you can just change your name and start again.

I agree.

I like

While I'm not disputing that there may well be some rather odd people who get off on stories of heavy periods or whatever, I think there are fare more likely to be people on here who have massively benefited from being able to say things on an anonymous forum that they'd never say out loud in real life. I mean, there's still this weird taboo about talking about things like periods and I know that I've found comments and experiences shared on here quite useful in understanding, for example, how my body and periods are changing as I near menopause. Honestly, I've always experienced flooding for example but had no idea it was a THING or had a name. Thanks MN for that and helping me realise it wasn't just me!

And while I absolutely agree with not putting identifying details out there, again, sometimes, being able to talk completely honestly about something that's happening with the DC on an anonymous forum is incredibly helpful, especially if it's something my child would be mortified if anyone he/she knew in real life knew about it.

@itsneilthebaby

I thought this the other day about the poster talking about their teenage daughter wanting to buy bondage underwear. Surprise surprise it was removed not long after

Were there any cool mums on it before it was zapped? 'Oh that wouldn't bother me at all' or 'I really couldn't get worked up about this' or 'good for her for exploring her fetishes'? I often wonder if those posters are real or just Big Dave from Shepherd's Bush types.

@MrsRobinsonsHandprints

Why would you be embarrassed?

@SpinningTheSeedsOfLove

Whilst I am pretty much the polar opposite of a “cool” mum, I don’t assume that those with very different parenting styles to me are necessarily trolls

But how could they cross check? Your other user names could be any one of thousands and thousands?

It happens already, someone namechanges and posts something, obviously not wanting to out some of their back story, and someone will pop up and say "this sounds familiar, aren't you user123, you posted XYZ last week, has that problem been resolved now before you're thinking about this?"

It would only get worse if people could match years or post numbers up as well.

@stimpyyouidiot

Usually something encouraging people to tell their own Piss/poo/period/sleeping in same bed as parent/embarrassing stories etc.

Well sorry but if you can’t talk about periods on a site like MN, where on earth can you do that?!?

Periods are normal and a part of life. It would a really sad time when women have to restrain themselves from talking about periods problems.

Same with women who have incontinente issues. I’ve seen threads where the OP was struggling and they were told to stop the thread because poo troll blablabla. Basically we are told, one again, as women, to police ourselves and stop asking for help/share experiences.

I’m getting sick of it.

As for identifying details….

Are people nit careful about what they are posting?
Like name change on a regular bais, changing details such as number if dcs, their sex or their age? Do people ever share where they live AND share very personal details under the same name?

I mean there are many things you can do to protect yourself. When people are ‘recognised’ (like are you user1234 that posted last week about xxx) it’s usually because the stories are very close or link in an easy way, despite the name change. Again, there is a lot you can do about that. Our anonymity is also our responsibility.

On the other hand, MN is a brilliant place to ask for advice/opinions about things you don't want to ask people IRL. People are informed about services/products that they had no idea existed or were the norm/useful for a myriad of problems and also to find out how common certain problems are so they worry kess about them. They might want to know if their outlook/rules are 'normal' amongst other parents of teens.

Yes, trolls exist BUT so do parents who need to be able to ask for help & advice!!

Sadly, someone who has been here years & years is not guaranteed not to be a troll, we've had a few who have played the very long game!!

Same with women who have incontinence issues. I’ve seen threads where the OP was struggling and they were told to stop the thread because poo troll blablabla. Basically we are told, one again, as women, to police ourselves and stop asking for help/share experiences.

No one can stop these topics from being discussed on MN but I am always glad when someone flags up the possibility that someone may be out there wanking over, for example, an incontinence post.

Some posters are genuinely unaware that particular topics are frequently fetishised and may want to stop posting about it.