The Queen and a Wheelchair

[Nellielephant]

AIBU to be annoyed that the newspapers are reporting that the Queen does not want to be seen in a Wheelchair? For those of us who have no choice I find this attitude upsetting as if it is something to be ashamed of.
Giylrs Brandreth has said it would be undignified for her to use one!

"That reads like you think she should be pushed out of her position as the queen because she now needs a wheelchair sometimes? Yet people wonder why she’d rather keep her health private…"

No, it reads like someone who thinks that at some point everyone has to accept that they need to retire.

We all know the Queen thinks she is appointed by God and is not going to abdicate, but the UK does need a HOS who is capable of filling the role and if she isn't willing to accept that then maybe there should be legislation that says that past a certain age all responsibilities of the monarch need to pass down the tree.

When it boils down to it we don't actually really know what the Queen's thoughts are on wheelchairs and whether or not she has one - if she chooses not to have one for whatever reason, that is her valid reason that she has a right to have.

I don't know her personally, but I'm sure whatever her feelings are, it is certainly not meant as a slight on people who need them or that they ate embarrassing.

My mother needs one to help with her failing mobility, fairly refuses to use one as she sees it as giving up when she is still able to get around and feels if she has one whatever mobility she has now will be gone - totally valid point/feeling and nothing at all to do with how she perceives wheelchairs.
My cousin is in a wheelchair following an accident and absolutely hates it with a passion, but is slowly coming around to it - again another valid point/feeling. We don't know the conversation that took place, the reasons etc, so to surmise its like she's embarrassed is unreasonable

Can you think of any other leader who is pushed around in a chair.

Roosevelt. He was paralysed from the waist down. But he managed to keep that fact well hidden. It’s the reason the desk in the Oval Office has a fascia to the front - to hide it.

I understand you OP. There should be no shame or stigma in using a wheelchair, whatever your age or whatever the reason for needing to use it. The Queen is nearly 96 and although she has always been seen as in robust health, she should now be able to use a wheelchair without comment or eyebrows raised. It's a shame IF she is hiding it away.

@museumum

Is the queen not supposed to always be higher than everyone else or something weird like that? I mean it’s not “normal” being queen is it?

Although I think commentators should be more careful about what they are implying about other wheelchair users when they discuss this.

I think it’s metaphorical.

Bless her. She’s not tall (being polite here) so she’s not literally higher and she’s worn specs for decades, so we know she has human frailties. Honestly, much though we’re all describing the adjustment that losing our mobility was, it’s just like needing glasses, ramped up a few degrees, made difficult by the built environment and the attitudes of the ignorant.

The more I read these comments, the more I think, old lady or not, her courtiers really should put it to her that she is role model, including in the field of disability visibility.

My mother hates being in a wheelchair or mobility scooter. She's too low down and people talk over her head and ignore her.

I think it's up to her. When my MIL had a stroke she point blank refused to go out in her wheelchair. The Gyles Brandreth comment is a bit crass though.

@CapMarvel

"That reads like you think she should be pushed out of her position as the queen because she now needs a wheelchair sometimes? Yet people wonder why she’d rather keep her health private…"

No, it reads like someone who thinks that at some point everyone has to accept that they need to retire.

We all know the Queen thinks she is appointed by God and is not going to abdicate, but the UK does need a HOS who is capable of filling the role and if she isn't willing to accept that then maybe there should be legislation that says that past a certain age all responsibilities of the monarch need to pass down the tree.

Maybe on some random royalist thread, but this thread is literally about her needing a wheelchair and you are saying she needs to retire now…. It totally does read like that. They are a family and the other members are helping fulfil engagements that she can’t make, which is absolutely as it should be, no need to change the law to hide the old people and wheelchair users away.

My mother, who was a similar age, hated using a wheelchair even though it made life much easier. It's completely up to the person concerned, and really doesn't have any impact on other people's choices.

@SenecaFallsRedux

The ableism on this thread is astounding. I think some of you need to visit the Franklin D. Roosevelt memorial in Washington DC and see the statue of him seated in his wheelchair. And then also see the children in wheelchairs rolling up to have their picture taken next to the president.

Of course, it is the Queen's choice. But it would be a much better choice for her to be willing to be seen in a wheelchair.

The president who didn't want to be seen in a wheelchair?

@YanTanTetheraPetheraPimp

My mother missed out on so much by refusing to use a wheelchair, including her granddaughter’s wedding and great grandchildren’s christenings. She effectively made herself housebound for at least 5 years before she needed to be. And then complained bitterly how she couldn’t get to these or a number of other family occasions. Really sad. She happily used one however for hospital and doctors appointments.

The first time my mother agreed to use a wheelchair was so that she could attend DS's graduation. Pushing it around Sheffield was not fun!

@cranberryhaddock

YABU for caring about anything Gyles Brandreth says. removes tongue from cheek Seriously though, the only person who should care about whether the Queen is seen in a wheelchair or not is the Queen. She should do exactly what she is most comfortable doing.

She is the Queen. She is our head of state. She can't be seen looking frail ,under a blanket, in a wheelchair. She would need a flunky to wheel her about. It doesn't look statesman like.

Maybe you need to change your mindset on wheelchairs. And on what does and doesn't look 'statesmanlike'.

President Obama in a wheelchair whizzing around the corridors of power in his day, totally statesmanlike. Poor, frail, hunched ,very, very old woman covered by a blanket to stop her freezing to death in Westminster Abbey. Far, far less convincing as a head of state.

As a reasonably young Granny I truly grieve the loss of my mobility, balance and co-ordination.
That said, a mobility scooter has opened many freedom opportunities.

@nocoolnamesleft

I think Roosevelt is an amazing role model. Sadly, I suspect he would have found it much harder to be elected in the era of wall to wall TV.

Maybe things need to change?

Nobody would complacently make that comment about someone of my ethnicity.

The fact that people would make it about someone of mobility status is shocking.

Roosevelt hated being seen in a wheelchair.

She probably doesn't want the endless speculation. Certain parts of the UK media would lose their minds. It's her choice.

I should think it’s her own personal view of how she sees herself in a wheelchair and her current mood. She is probably still in the depths of grief after losing her husband so that won’t help her to think clearly.

My friend has been in a wheelchair for 65 years but won’t even contemplate the idea of changing to an electric one as she thinks she will feel disabled then whereas she doesn’t now.
Another friend uses two sticks to walk due to ms but doesn’t want a wheelchair as her legs will lose too much muscle tone so she struggles on.

It’s all down to personal preferences and beliefs really…

@AngelinaFibres

Roosevelt hated being seen in a wheelchair.

Yes because nearly everyone was an ablesist arsehole then.

We are supposed to have progressed.

It’s the Queen’s choice but it would be lovely if high profile people felt able to take a public stance by using their chairs.

"Maybe on some random royalist thread, but this thread is literally about her needing a wheelchair and you are saying she needs to retire now…. It totally does read like that. They are a family and the other members are helping fulfil engagements that she can’t make, which is absolutely as it should be, no need to change the law to hide the old people and wheelchair users away."

That's not what I'm saying at all, you are just trying to construct a strawman. I don't want to hide wheelchair users away, ffs, but she's a 95 year old woman who both deserves a retirement and has a responsibility to hand over the role. Frankly it's just another reason to do away with the whole stupid system.

@Thoosa

I think some of you need to visit the Franklin D. Roosevelt memorial in Washington DC and see the statue of him seated in his wheelchair. And then also see the children in wheelchairs rolling up to have their picture taken next to the president.

Oh how lovely. I hadn’t heard of that.

Do you think an adult politics nerd could wheel up and do the same?

I'm sure that would be fine. There is also a statue of his little dog Fala. It's a great site for photo opportunities.

My mum is the same age as the queen, there is less than a week between them, her mobility is poor but she doesn't want to use a wheelchair, she feels once she gets used to one she won't be able to walk at all. She also won't stay in bed when she is ill, she is afraid that if she 'takes to the bed' she will never leave it. Her feelings are her own and they are valid, as are yours op, as are the queen's.

@Ozanj

I don’t think any disabled person enjoys using a wheelchair. They use it because they have to and the alternative is a bed or a static chair. So it’s possible, especially if the use is only temporary, that the queen just doesn’t see the point of being photographed in it

I don't think thats true..

I very much enjoyed being able to whizz down steep slopes in my manual chair, I enjoy not standing in pain in queues, I enjoy being able to go shopping and yes, I enjoy zooming along at 6mph walking the dogs at a pace they like rather than dawdling along like most people would at the more average 4mph human walking pace.

Would I enjoy being able to walk and run and so on more.. probably, I really don't know because I've never experienced doing that without intense pain and the ever present risk of falling.

Im sure my view doesn't apply to ALL wheelchair users, but I do know it applies to more folk than just me (cos I've talked about it with other wheelchair users) - don't assume... some of us are having fun!

I couldn’t care less whether she uses one.

There is also a statue of his little dog Fala. It's a great site for photo opportunities.

And the dog to seal the deal. It’s almost like you knew me!

(Is that the one that got run over? Hyde Park? Some home named like a London park?)

@PinkFluffyUnicornSlippers

It’s her choice though. Some people don’t want to be seen in one, you don’t mind. Both choices are OK. 🤷‍♀️

Well, tbf, not everybody gets two choices.