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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed with the school re trip

311 replies

pisspants · 17/03/2022 08:14

I understand schools and teachers are busy and that it is great they have tried to organise a trip. I am upset on behalf of my dc though. There's an upcoming trip, details of which went out in one email over a month ago, with no further mentions or reminders about it. This week a follow up email went out regarding more details about what to wear for the trip etc which was the first I knew of the trip. I checked the online payment system and was no sign of it on there so called the school and they say the deadline has passed as the bus needed to know numbers etc a while back so my dc will have to miss the trip. I appreciate I missed one email which was sent in the middle of the day whilst I was working so didnt see it. It then got buried amongst all the crappy emails I get every day from everywhere I've ever bought anything from. Because of that my DC now misses the educational trip that almost the whole year is going on? I know I dropped a ball by not seeing the email but I would have expected a follow up email as a reminder of a payment deadline or something at the least?

OP posts:
Duracellbunnywannabe · 17/03/2022 08:16

I think you are being unreasonable.

Beees · 17/03/2022 08:18

I really doubt that the 1 email you missed was the only communication about the trip. Every school I've ever work in or with will have sent several emails and most likely a physical letter to get the parents written permission. Did your child not talk about the trip and is it possible he actually didn't pass along any letter because he didn't want to go?

LadyCatStark · 17/03/2022 08:19

Surely your child knew about the trip and should have mentioned it to you. There’s usually a big build up to a trip.

JuliaSways · 17/03/2022 08:19

You need to filter your messages, block any spam and take control of your emails.

This isn't a school issue I'm afraid.

nearlyspringyay · 17/03/2022 08:19

Yabu, it's but the schools job to chase you.

If you're missing emails stick a rule on anything from the school so it goes to a different folder, or set an email address just for school correspondence.

I spent hours unsubscribing from everything a few years ago, very cathartic.

iwantcurry · 17/03/2022 08:20

I would be upset too, the school could at least try and find a solution! You've missed one email, and if you've not had any reminders that's a little unfair. It's your son that is missing out not you. I would think chances are someone would be unwell for the trip so you could at least be on stand by. Is it a whole class educational trip? Is there any chance of you transporting him there?

Plumbear2 · 17/03/2022 08:20

School sent you an email in the middle of the day, in the hours that school operates. Its not their fault you didn't check your email.

iwantcurry · 17/03/2022 08:21

In my inbox I can favourite certain senders and they come up as a reminder separately on my phone- might be an idea for the future?

LadyMacduff · 17/03/2022 08:22

Definitely have an email cull and unsubscribe from all marketing mail unless you really use it.

Delete emails as soon as they've come in or move them to a folder if they need to keep it. This will mean you don't have dozens of unread emails in your inbox and miss things that are important.

DorothyZbornakIsAQueen · 17/03/2022 08:23

It's your fault sorry OP.

If I had an email regarding a trip, I would be looking out for the next one.

Is there no way you can highlight emails from the school so they are obvious. On Gmail, ive set the school ones that come in, to have a yellow arrow at the left hand side to highlight them.

A bit after the horse has bolted sorry, but it isn't the schools fault that you didn't see the email.

Confrontayshunme · 17/03/2022 08:23

It won't have been the only communication. I have never worked in a school which sends out a single email for a trip. YABU though I doubt you will agree. It would be nice to put your guilt on school, but you don't get to.

Overthebow · 17/03/2022 08:23

So you miss the email because of your disorganisation and it’s the schools fault? When the majority of the rest of the school managed to read and pay on time? Not sure you can blame the school for this one.

FairyCakeWings · 17/03/2022 08:23

Schools can’t be expected to chase up parents that don’t check their emails. Does your school do a newsletter? Our newsletter lists everything that has been sent out that week so parents can check themselves if they’ve missed anything.

Whinge · 17/03/2022 08:24

I really doubt that the 1 email you missed was the only communication about the trip.

I was coming on to say similar. It would be very unusual for there to just be one email and then nothing else. OP you say you feel upset on behalf of your DC, but is your child actually upset that they're not going?

LaChanticleer · 17/03/2022 08:25

YABU

Learn to organise your email inbox with folders. Basic adulting.

Womencanlift · 17/03/2022 08:26

I am sure there was a very similar post recently about the exact same scenario

Anyway yes YABU as you dropped the ball. Just because they sent it during the day and you were working means that they did anything wrong. Are you the only parent in that school who works? Very unlikely, yet other parents managed to pick the email up

Could you not take the day off and drive your child there, offer to be a helper so they don’t miss out? Or ask someone else to do that if you are not in a position to do so

LethargeMarg · 17/03/2022 08:27

Op I have just done the same thing and only had one email which is a pain but I don't expect extra reminders and to be honest this would only add to my email inbox!!To be fair when I was a teacher in the days when all letters were on paper I'd have only sent one initial letter out to book a place on a trip . It's even harder when you've three kids at different schools trust me !

bellabasset · 17/03/2022 08:27

So much rubbish is sent by email that I keep one email address for bills etc. Is your dc old enough to have known about it? I can fully understand the school's situation but I'd probably ask again if there was any chance of a space on the bus as I feel so guilty I'd missed the email Blush

lemongreentea · 17/03/2022 08:29

does the school have an app that you can get notifications on. if so download this or make friends with a parent who knows everything about the school and/or join or set up a class whatsapp. hopefully your dc wont miss another trip.

also worthwhile to remind your dc to tell you if they got any letters from school.

fairylightsandwaxmelts · 17/03/2022 08:34

YABU.

It's not the schools' fault you didn't check your e-mails.

CornedBeef451 · 17/03/2022 08:35

That's so annoying.

I'm struggling with information from schools now as I have 4 apps across 2 schools, plus emails, 5 minute videos on one of the apps containing one sentence of vital information plus the occasional paper letter.

Oh, and the primary uses 2 ways to prebook hot dinners somewhere between 1 and 4 weeks in advance based on the patterns of the moon or some such thing.

I feel like I am constantly trying to chase bits of scattered information and have so far missed DS' last primary Christmas lunch booking, one primary parents evening, I have had to chase information for a trip I had paid for but had no idea when it was or that I needed to pick DD up at 9pm, (the one paper letter this year) and DD had a surprise double vaccination yesterday as I had filled in the consent form weeks ago with no date given and then missed the mention of the date on one of the apps, or was it in an email, or on the school website calendar?

I just found out DS has topic homework which we have never done as it is only on the year group section of the school website. Luckily it is voluntary as neither of us knew about it and we're just vaguely confused that sometimes children would turn up at school with papier-mâché models of the solar system. I just thought they had very keen parents.

This is harder work than my actual full time job.

Sorry, rant over, but I feel your pain and would be very annoyed in your position. I would have expected the school to send another email or whatever for a while year trip.

FoxyFoxyLoxy · 17/03/2022 08:37

@Plumbear2

School sent you an email in the middle of the day, in the hours that school operates. Its not their fault you didn't check your email.
Pretty much this. It's also not their fault that you receive lots of marketing email that you can't be bothered to unsubscribe from.
Original poster
pisspants · 17/03/2022 08:38

I went through my emails after receiving the final preparation email and there was definitely nothing else sent about it other than the first one. Ok point taken, my fault. I usually deal with everything immediately for this reason but missed that one. I'll see if I can set something up on my email account for the school to highlight their emails. They send a lot of irrelevant emails out as well as important ones though!
My DC is usually in a world of their own so didnt mention it. No chance of me driving him there as is too short notice for me to get the time off work and the place they are going to needed confirmation of numbers whenever the deadline was as well.

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 17/03/2022 08:38

This so not the fault of the school. You need to be more organised with your e mails.

historygeek · 17/03/2022 08:38

The school will have sent reminders about final payments etc but only to the children that signed up to the trip... you missed the email, so your child wasn't signed up to the trip. There would be people complaining on Mumsnet if they were bombarded with emails about trips their child wasn't attending. This one's on you I'm afraid.