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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be disappointed with the school re trip

311 replies

pisspants · 17/03/2022 08:14

I understand schools and teachers are busy and that it is great they have tried to organise a trip. I am upset on behalf of my dc though. There's an upcoming trip, details of which went out in one email over a month ago, with no further mentions or reminders about it. This week a follow up email went out regarding more details about what to wear for the trip etc which was the first I knew of the trip. I checked the online payment system and was no sign of it on there so called the school and they say the deadline has passed as the bus needed to know numbers etc a while back so my dc will have to miss the trip. I appreciate I missed one email which was sent in the middle of the day whilst I was working so didnt see it. It then got buried amongst all the crappy emails I get every day from everywhere I've ever bought anything from. Because of that my DC now misses the educational trip that almost the whole year is going on? I know I dropped a ball by not seeing the email but I would have expected a follow up email as a reminder of a payment deadline or something at the least?

OP posts:
Whatwouldscullydo · 17/03/2022 11:03

You missed the “here’s a survey for you to fill in about whether we communicate enough

😂😂😂

My bad. Although you forgot the multiple emails reminding us of the deadline for filling In said survey
..

lucysnowe2 · 17/03/2022 11:07

Ah I feel you for you OP. No judgment here. I can't work out tho if the trip was a whole class thing, why they didn't have all the kids' places prebooked anyway? nearly all the class would go, wouldn't they, unless sick? in which case maybe it wasn't a v. important thing, and a number of kids will have missed it.

Original poster
pisspants · 17/03/2022 11:11

Yeah I really don't understand it when is whole year whole school.
Father not involved at all I am single parent so all falls on me. Not an excuse but have a lot of organisational shit to deal with for self, plus 2 DCs and their various activities etc.
Anyway, lesson learnt. I have 49000 emails in my inbox. Had not heard of unroll me, sounds like a game changer! Otherwise will take me hours and hours to unsubscribe and delete everything in there

OP posts:
lucysnowe2 · 17/03/2022 11:16

OP I have 42,000 emails in my inbox !

MsTSwift · 17/03/2022 11:18

Tip I found unsubscribing didn’t work 🙄 it’s best to block the emails from the companies

PoloMintPatty · 17/03/2022 11:20

Sorry if I missed this but what age is DC?

That would influence me. If young then absolutely more falls to the parent but at high school the DC are expected to be more clued up and tell us things so we barely get any info formally.

Pollysmum2012 · 17/03/2022 11:21

I feel for you too OP and think some of the posters are being a bit harsh. Also did your OH not see the email either? Not sure why it's always the mum's reponsibility! In our case we are lucky as a couple of parents in the year group act as class reps to remind us of things like this - if we just relied on emails from the school I'd miss half the things too! We get so many emails from the school, most of which are completely useless, but just occasionally a really important one hidden in there.

Bigassbeebuzzbuzz · 17/03/2022 11:22

OP I dont blame you schools are nightmares for hiding information you need in waffles of other letters.
I once had an email saying "school closed due to snow" although they didnt actually put what school it was for. When I had 3 dc in 3 separate schools that was fun Hmm
In reality noone has the time or is interested in what anyone other than their own childs year is doing so stop with the extras that could be chucked on a weekly newsletter.

Belladonna12 · 17/03/2022 11:23

Exactly it's the child that suffers. Which is why the parent should check school emails daily.

And why schools should send more than one communication regarding trips. They are also supposed to care about children too and most do which is why they would normally send reminders. Even if parents do check e mails daily sometimes they are not received or go to junk or are just buried under 100s of other emails (if my work e mail is anything to go by.)

Pollysmum2012 · 17/03/2022 11:23

Sorry OP just seen you are a single parent - even harder to deal with all the reams of school stuff!

doitbelieveit · 17/03/2022 11:32

I use three different email addresses to keep on top of everything.

One for my personal messages, one for school, clubs and other family stuff, and a third for shopping, accounts etc. The first two I carefully keep on top of, the third sometimes gets a bit out of control but I try not to sign up for marketing and unsubscribe regularly to avoid the build up of junk.

Now its easy to see multiple mailboxes on your phone I find this really helps me manage everything, with three DC in different places there are a lot of messages. I do occasionally drop the ball, so don't feel too bad OP, I'm sure everyone does sometimes.

Walkingthedog46 · 17/03/2022 11:37

Can you let them know that should anyone drop, even at the last minute, out you are still keen for your son to go. Perhaps get together the kit list just in case.

grapehyacinthisactuallyblue · 17/03/2022 11:38

Do they have school website?

I find it easier to check the school website for information about upcoming activities rather than email from school. There's always list of letters and emails school has sent out.
Otherwise I would be the same, easily miss the important email from school, buried among others.

Rosehugger · 17/03/2022 11:57

I do have sympathy, OP, it's hard to keep up with school emails when you are busy working and not necessarily in regular contact with other parents. I did used to get the occasional phone call from the office when we'd missed something. They usually do follow up for a trip in school time.

Perhaps set up a rule in your emails that emails from the school address are flagged as important and placed in a folder that you check regularly.

Blackberrybunnet · 17/03/2022 12:05

set up a hotmail account. Give that address to the school. Now only school emails go to that account and don't get mixed in with all he other crap. problem solved

BoredZelda · 17/03/2022 12:14

I find that really sad, not to care about your wider school community

Or, let’s keep emails purporting to contain important information, specific to year groups. The other stuff about the community at large can be put in newsletters.

My daughter has been at her high school for 138 days. In that time we have received 149 general school emails. That’s on top of the around 40 other emails, specific to only my daughter.

I have construction projects I’m working on worth millions which attract fewer emails than that.

BoredZelda · 17/03/2022 12:17

set up a hotmail account. Give that address to the school. Now only school emails go to that account and don't get mixed in with all he other crap. problem solved

Except, as has been said, easy to miss the important ones with the spam the school sends.

Hunderland · 17/03/2022 12:19

@iwantcurry

In my inbox I can favourite certain senders and they come up as a reminder separately on my phone- might be an idea for the future?
I've done this for the dentist after missing an appointment!
SeanMean · 17/03/2022 12:31

YABU.

Blondeshavemorefun · 17/03/2022 15:40

I’ve set school as bio so is starred on emails and shows on phone screen when arrive

Alwayscheerful · 17/03/2022 16:57

Set the school emails to play a fanfare on your phone when an email from school lands in your in box .
You can choose the sound
Harp
Air raid Siren
Fairground music

You choose .. maybe a school bell sound

lillyjemima · 17/03/2022 17:04

@JuliaSways

You need to filter your messages, block any spam and take control of your emails.

This isn't a school issue I'm afraid.

I agree with this
ThePrincessSleptFor100Years · 17/03/2022 17:22

Jesus.

Ok so it’s the OP’s oversight.

Do we need to be utter dicks about it?

SquirrelFan · 17/03/2022 17:34

I think yanbu. I work in a school, and I bet that someone was supposed to send a reminder but didn't. As you said, they're supposed to care about the kids - surely if it's such a big deal, they should have noticed/flagged up the kids whose parents haven't replied. Also, if your kid has to stay at the school, someone's got to look after him - staffing issues alone would have our school phoning a parent just to make sure!

VickyEadieofThigh · 17/03/2022 17:54

But did the OP's child not even mention it? "Mum, can I go on the school trip to x?"