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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want son to share Netflix password!

145 replies

idontgetpaidenoughforthis · 16/03/2022 07:16

Someone is using our Netflix account when everyone in the smiley is at work. I'd got an idea that it was DS (18) girlfriend.

I changed after getting the notification that it was being used on a new device. DS wasn't at home until yesterday and he asked me for the new password to put in his smart tv. Then last night he went to girlfriends house. This morning I got an email notification that the account was signed into on a streaming stick at 23:37. It can only be him at girlfriend's house so her whole family can use it.

AIBU to think I pay for the service and someone else should not get it for free? Or am I being tight-fisted?

OP posts:
Pyri · 16/03/2022 08:16

I can’t believe how many uptight people on this thread. It’s just Netflix. Worst that happens is it gives you different “next watch” recommendations or puts you in different order on some tv show. It wouldn’t even occur to me to discuss “boundaries and respect” but just to ask him to set up a new user for himself and use that one.

Momicrone · 16/03/2022 08:16

I don't like sharing it either

kittenkipping · 16/03/2022 08:25

Personally I'm happy to use all of the profiles I have - which means us, plus my mum , plus my best mate. Frankly large companies earn plenty imo and I'm happy to get the absolute most o can for what I'm paying. They can't change my password as the verification would go to my email.

I couldn't be angry that someone is watching tv. It's not costing you extra or causing you problems (beyond the - unnecessary? stress where your checking in who's logging on and when they're watching etc) unless it's stopping your watching I just don't get them harm.

Mirrorball2022 · 16/03/2022 08:30

I share mine with family: my dad. I wouldn’t want the password being passed around different families tbh.

dworky · 16/03/2022 08:44

Unless you pay, you have no right to share it without permission.

Chloemol · 16/03/2022 08:45

Time for a conversation with ds. He watches via his laptop and does not share the password. I would change it again, give it to him and see what happens

If he shares he won’t get it again, he can set up and pay for his own

Hadjab · 16/03/2022 08:50

I’m really not bothered as long as it’s not my profile being used. I hate getting recommendations for programmes I would never watch.

EthelTheAardvark · 16/03/2022 08:55

How does having the password give the girlfriend access to all the account details?

EveryFlightBeginsWithAFall · 16/03/2022 09:02

She's not going to be able to change anything as it will be set to your email account

This wouldn't bother me as long as she wasn't using my profile and it didn't affect our ability to watch what we want when we want

lemonnandliime · 16/03/2022 09:03

@SausagePourHomme

ridiculous. It doesn't disadvantage you in any way. It is designed up to be shared
It certainly does if too many devices try to log in at the same time.
Momicrone · 16/03/2022 09:05

I thought it was designed to be shared within one household, I thought they were starting to crack down on multi household usage

ReacherMargrave · 16/03/2022 09:06

Like a PP advised change it again and change it on your sons tv so he doesn't need to ask for it.

LouiseBelchersBunnyEars · 16/03/2022 09:07

@Faevern

It's the not asking, the entitlement isn't it?

I share the standard plan with my DS, I went on Netflix and it said two devices were streaming. I texted to see if both DS and DGD were on it, they were not. I discovered that a relative who had used my password once on their iPad while staying at my home had been using it ever since. My fault for not changing the password but I was pissed off at the entitlement.

But the DS did ask? And OP told him. Chances are it was him that entered it rather than her asking, or I’m assuming she asked him and he said yes? Either way, take it up with son, not the gf.
lemonnandliime · 16/03/2022 09:07

If your son is logging into his girlfriends device and watching it with her only then YABU. Ask him to sign out when he leaves.

If he is logging into various devices and her family are all using it when he isn't there and stopping you being able to use it then YANBU and I'd change the password and tell him you will only share it once more with him before cutting him off the account.

ElegantlyTouched · 16/03/2022 09:09

Change the password then login your son's TV yourself. Deny all knowledge.

Dotdotdotdashdashdashdotdotdot · 16/03/2022 09:37

DS had a girlfriend that gave him her family password. He was still watching even after they broke up!

We did then get our own Netflix, wouldn’t bother me if he gave it to his new GF. We have DM & FIL on it.

Belladonna12 · 16/03/2022 09:41

Surely it was your son who signed in in and as you gave him the password what are you complaining about? The girlfriend's family probably don't know anything about it and no reason to assume that they are going to use it but you can always change the password to prevent that. You are being really tight-fisted and mean to make such a big deal about it.

BellaTheDarkOverlord · 16/03/2022 09:51

I don't mind so much if if doesn't affect my use. Dh shared it around his family so we had like 3 other families using it. It meant that it kicked me off. I changed pass.

Walkingalot · 16/03/2022 09:54

I think it depends on what type of account you have - you may only be able to stream one device (basic) even though you can set upto 5 profiles.
I've got standard (2 users) as my DS will watch something upstairs in his room while I watch something different downstairs. Basically, you pay for the service to be able to use it when you want. I wouldn't like him giving another family his user profile, that's CF territory.

FixTheBone · 16/03/2022 09:56

@SausagePourHomme

ridiculous. It doesn't disadvantage you in any way. It is designed up to be shared
Its actually a breach of the terms and conditions that you sign up to, to share the password outside your household.

It's harmless until Netflix ban your devices, or put their prices up in order to protect their business model.

gettingolderbutcooler · 16/03/2022 09:57

I wouldn't for Netflix as we only signed up for one device.

YouHaveYourFathersBreasts · 16/03/2022 09:57

I’d be annoyed as it seems your son has deliberately made the decision to not ask you if this is ok. Also a Netflix account is hardly expensive- they can presumably afford their own, tight fuckers.

MadameDragon · 16/03/2022 10:01

I wouldn’t like it if you had asked him not to, but it doesn’t seem that you have from what you say.

jesuisavecukraine · 16/03/2022 10:23

No yanbu, Netflix have been known to deactivate accounts if they think password sharing is happening, also even though it's only a few quid a month why shoukd you cover thr cost of it at the girlfriend's house.

Change the password and connect your sons TV to the Netflix yourself. That way he doesn't have the password to share around

frazzledasarock · 16/03/2022 10:28

This discussion always polarises responses.

There are people on one side who have paid for the service and feel they should get to decide who does and does not use the service.

And the other side who think, well it doesn't cost you anymore for me to use it or you're tight, whinging entitled people.