My sister have two children; 13 and 11. Both will turn a year older this year. Only a few years ago was I allowed to visit my sister home, when I did I could see why she didn’t ever invite us around. It was trashed; you couldn’t see the floor in the kids room or hers, kitchen was an absolute tip with bags of things on the counter tops. It looks chaotic. The dining room table where I presume the kids did their homework was pack to the rafters with rubbish. I spend days hauling out the trash and organising the entire home into a liveable condition.
My mum used to have them on weekdays a few times a week and each time she would check their lunch boxes and they would both be untouched. They pretty much hadn’t eaten since breakfast and picked at their dinners. We mentioned this to her and she defended their actions.
Fast forward a few years, my mother and I noticed my nephew had lost a considerable amount of weight, he has no muscle tone in his arms, it’s actually skin and bone. Dark circles around his eyes and he hasn’t grown; still wearing the coat I brought him 4 Christmases ago, in addition, he still wears the same size school uniform since he started in year 7 (currently year 8). He avoids meals and becomes upset when it’s time to eat. We mentioned this to her and she said he eats at home, hasn’t taken us seriously. Recently he told her he has an eating disorder and he needs help, she lied and said she made an appointment with the doctor and recently admitted this indeed didn’t happen. He only eats about 2-3 mouthfuls a days and a few sips of water. He’s been experiencing severe anxiety. He has a phobia of food; thinks he’s going to be poisoned / allergic. Growing up she’s told us all he has allergies to certain foods, he actually isn’t any. Her and the dad (before they separated) use to tell him when he starts big school he’s going to have to get a taxi because he might get kidnapped. On top
Of this, they haven’t ever had any friends around it’s always been them. He has been having panic attacks he now avoids car journeys, new experiences, doesn’t like the bus so walks to school every morning (not close by), he had a breakdown yesterday asking why his life has to be this way. He’s very unwell, you can see it. My sister smokes cannabis everyday, she works in a school for a few hours in the afternoon and then goes to her second job 5pm to 11pm, which means the kids are alone that entire time. She doesn’t cook so pops back on her lunch at 9pm to bring their chips. They never have fruits or vegetables. I’ve now become aware of this and have had to start spending time there until 11pm to make sure they’re looked after. My niece said she doesn’t like to be home alone with her brother as she doesn’t know how to help him as he becomes emotional at times and grabs his throat. I have a 5 month old baby so going around there and staying until 11pm
Is difficult and beginning to impact my sons routine.
Im sure I’ve missed a lot of stuff. What should I do?