To have done the most embarrassing thing ever

[faceonfire]

Happened about an hour ago and I think I’ll need to go home and never come back to the office again

I work with a very very very handsome man. He was on the phone in the office this morning trying to sort out someone to come and fix his boiler.

He happened to say his postcode and me being the creepy wee lady I am put it into maps on my phone to see where he lived

For some reason (and I still don’t know why) my phone blared

STARTING ROUTE FROM current location TO handsome man’s postcode

I was 6 feet away in a quiet office. He turned to look and I couldn’t even look up for wanting the ground to swallow me whole.

How do I come back from this? 😂

Please someone else tell me you’ve done something equally as embarrassing

I'd like to think I would have said "see you later big boy " while giving him a massive wink

But in reality I would probably have sat there open mouthed while turning beetroot.

Sorry, not much help.

I'm so sorry but I think you need to leave your job and then leave the country and potentially even change your name and get reconstructive surgery.

Classic.

Or another option is move onto the same road as him?

Hilarious OP! You need a new job.

@Fullyhuman

WhiteKinderBueno

A few years ago I was getting my eyes tested at the opticians. I was sat in the chair and the optician was sat right in front of my face with the torch holding her finger in front of my eyes saying "look left" "look right" etc whilst she checked my pupils.

She then said to look down, and said what I heard as "just blow on my finger". So I sat there and started blowing on this lady's finger like how you'd blow on a bowl of hot soup. My heart absolutely sank when I realised she hadn't asked me to blow on her finger and had actually said to look "just below my finger". Sitting through the rest of the eye test was absolutely excruciating and it still haunts me to this day.

Amazing. Thank you for sharing.

What did the doctor say?

I've been laughing at this thread all day!

Not as embarrassing but years ago I was involved in a RTA and ended up with whiplash. Not long later, I had a dental appointment. As the dentist was lying the chair back after I'd sat down, he watched me wince in pain. He said "is there a problem?". I told him the whole story about the accident and how I'd hurt my neck. About two minutes later he calmly and patiently said "not my department I'm afraid. I meant with your teeth.".

I died a little bit that day, but just laugh about it now.

🤣

This weekend, you need to jog in his street. Up and down

@hawkinspawkins

🤣

This weekend, you need to jog in his street. Up and down

Oh please do! 🤣 Up and down - at least10 times!

@standupsitdownturnaround

No I’m married (to a great man!) I was just being a wee creep and doing my nosy. Alan is well known as the handsome chap around the office (sorry if that offends anyone or is deemed sexist but he is very lovely 😂)

Tbh I told my DH tonight - he knows I’m not planning on trying to jump Alan’s bones - and he agreed it’s time for an identity change 😂😬

I think he has a girlfriend as well although I’ll find out for sure when I turn up at his house in the next hour

Again, I’m joking….😏

I've been laughing at this thread all day!

Same, I keep coming back it and having a good giggle at the OP and the replies😂

‘Just blow on my finger’ is amazing 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Just horrific 🙈

Thank you for sharing!

OP, you rock!!

I’ll be honest, I watched Martin Lewis tonight and my husband was saying I could probably have powered Britain with the Beamer I’ve had all day

I’m just glad Hot Alan isn’t really called Alan…

I'm sorry but that's epic. Hilarious.

But you're definitely going to have to quit your job, sorry OP! 😂😂

😆😆😆😆 That's a good un.

@HaggisBurger

Hahaha no he’s definitely got a hotter name than Alan.

Sorry to all the Alans out there

Brilliant OP. Please do the jogging thing and also start sending him lots of unique gifts in the post. Order him a pizza tonight. Don’t let your newfound knowledge go to waste!

@Playplayaway

This was many many years ago but I still cringe. My boss bought his dog into the office briefly one day. The dog was sniffing my shoes and I said 'Oh he can probably smell my pussy' (meaning my cat). I was mortified and made an excuse to leave the room and could barely look him in the eye again. I was young and very easily embarrassed

So funny! Just snorted with stifled laughter

@Patienceandgrace

First time I have ever laughed out loud at a MN post

Yep, me too. I almost peed my pants as I ready a couple of funny ones in a row.

You put it into Google Maps?? I overhear a postcode (any postcode -regardless of how fit the postcodeee is) I put it into Rightmove to see what their house is like and how much it cost

"just being a wee creep", I think I love you OP. Creepers of the world unite!

To be honest when I first read this I thought there is nothing but to hand in your notice 😂 But yes yes to styling this out - you just need to make a repeated joke of it for all eternity and he will never know!

I was once on a packed commuter train googling ovulation and best times for baby making. I click on an American link and a video advert loads somewhere further down the page.

In the loudest American voice my phone booms:

"IMAGINE!!! KNOWING YOU ARE PREGNANT THE MOMENT IT HAPPENS".

Cue me frantically pressing all the buttons while a silent commuter train burst into sniggers.

Bloody phones.