Daughters school not doing world book day

[Bibbitybobbityboo86]

So my daughters school never do world book day - AIBU to be disappointed?
I imagine some parents will be relieved but my daughter gets upset when she sees the costumes in Sainsbury’s or sees other kids in their costumes.

It’s not just world book day- it’s also children in need & Red Nose Day. The school won’t do anything in fact none of it even gets mentioned - it’s like it’s not happening.

Would you feel disappointed?

WIBU for me to contact the head teacher and ask why? I don’t want to be that parent

I’ve mentioned it to other parents and they agree and say it’s a shame but they don’t seem as bothered by it as me

I do think the money schools ask for is constant and must be crippling for some families, it’s worse when you have multiple children so have to pay 2, 3, 4 x whatever they’re asking for. It isn’t just book day costumes, it’s the constant donations for charity or ‘school funds’. My DC’s school has a Christmas and summer fair to raise money for ‘school funds’, yet to see where that money has actually gone because nothing has updated (no new equipment for example).

They asked parents to buy the school books last year! I couldn’t believe it, sent an Amazon wish list to all parents and asked us to buy them. I did buy two for my favourite teachers who were super supportive during lockdown, received no thanks but anyway… They then had a book sale at the end of the year clearing the schools old library books to raise money for more school books and also said the summer fair was for books. On world book day they asked everyone to donate for, you guessed it, more school books. My DC still bring the same shitty school books home so finding it hard to believe. They charge for the school nativity too which is just mad.

I volunteer as a counsellor at a a school and every time dress up/ wear your own day comes up the anxiety around the children ramps up hugely. I wish they would stop stuff like this all together.

When mine were in primary school i used to loathe the fundraiser of get sponsorship style. Our children had no family to ask for sponsorships. So really it meant we as a family dipped in deeper and spread over siblings and dh and I to ensure our child felt they had done properly for school.

One year I totted up we over 3 children and 3 months had paid £385 to the school over varied charity / red nose / school cwmp/ theatre trips.

Our primary school didn't participate in WBD until a few years ago after a lot of requests from children and parents.

It's absolutely crystal clear that it is optional to participate but everyone gets the voucher. They encourage every child to share about their favourite book character. They can wear pjs or uniform on the day (idea being it's reading before bed as a healthy lifetime habit) and they can read a couple of extra books during that week for a certificate either at break and lunch or at home.

I think it's a shame for the majority of children who really enjoy these days, and are genuinely inspired to read.

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g wow you sound like a barrel of laughs! Lighten up! 😒

I so agree with your school and the head's sensitivity. I am a grandparent carer and although I could afford to do the dress up etc, my gs's loathed it and wore their football kits. It was a middle class school with an am-dram Head who loved it all without a thought for anyone struggling. It was so competitive between parents. Some parents did the dressing up from scratch thing and bitched about those who had paid for costumes. You couldn't win.

I moved my gs2 to another school and the difference was palpable. A feeling of caring and no pressure. Not everyone drives a Landrover or an audi the 100 metres to the school. If you feel disappointed in the schoo, speak to the Head. You are not that parent.

Its about learning not a costume competition which is what it has turned into. Also the continual asking for a £1 here and there. If you have a couple of kids, its difficult and embarasses some parents. Even having to bring in food and being given a list of foodstuffs by the PTA. Feel free to disagree but my observations are from bringing up two families at different schools and I know one or two parents who actually kept their children off school during these events.

@AngelinaFibres

When my children were small a class friend had a pyjama party. I was a single parent. My children's pyjamas were the last clothing item to be replaced. They were probably a hand me down in the first place. Both boys would have worn them for as many months as possible, so they would have been washed to faded oblivion and be far too short, before I replaced them. They were warm and clean but they were not suitable for public display. My mum bought new ones for each of them so they wouldn't stand out at the party. The parent who had the party thought it was a kindness to the poorer children as 'everyone has pyjamas, so that's easy'. She didn't have a clue because her life was a world away from mine.I worked as a teacher in very deprived areas before I had my own children. I was short of money as a single mum but those children lived in desperate poverty. They slept in their clothes or in their tee shirt and pants. The top and pants were worn for many, many days in a row. Having to buy anything at all that is 'extra' to your usual costs is a massive stress to add to all the other stress. I thought about money from the minute I woke up to the minute I went to sleep. You can't make short hair 'crazy' without putting hairspray/ gel/ temporary spray dye in it. If you don't use those things as an adult you have to buy them. And then pay a pound each for your children to have their hair like that too. Sometimes charity begins at home. You don't need a voucher for your child to read the WBD book, your daughter can dress up if you want to buy her the costume, she can raise money/ do something nice with your help without it involving the school.

This is so true my son did work experience last week in the drama department at his school ,he was told to dress smartly ,we are by no means rich and live in a deprived area but I got him a couple of cheap shirts from Primark ,and smart pants and he mixed and matched all week ,the boy who was also on work experience with him did his in his uniform as he didn't have any other smart clothes ,schools need to think of this .

In my opinion world book day should be about celebrating and promoting reading not dressing up. I also agree that non uniform day is hard on kids whose parents are very poor.

I totally disagree that this is something we should be getting rid of because of current political and economical climate. Actually it's at times likes this kids need to enjoy being kids the most. Of course not everyone will want to dress up or be able to afford a new costume but moments of occasion, times of celebration, excuses for joy and playfulness, these are more important in times of fear and scarcity and uncertainty not less. That's one of the worst things about covid that we cancelled the parties and festivals and parades that fuel our spirit of hope and togetherness. Dressing up and having fun and laughing and dancing, and mucking about, that is why we persevere, that is where resilience come from. We need to dig deep as a society for those who can't find the money or time to invest a little bit in their children's joy. We need to dig deep into ourselves to prioritise fun and celebration and happiness. Survival is not all. We as a species have always partied and feasted often as a battle cry against fear and scarcity and the unknown. It Matters.

@Eukanuba

I whole heartedly agree with all the posts from teachers / support staffs perspective. We absolutely dread it and the upset , anxiety and challenging behaviour that comes with it . A number of my children who wore their own clothes were even excluded from a ' parade ' as they weren't dressed as book characters. As staff we are expected to dress up also and singled out if we decline .Ridiculous.

What does ‘singled out’ mean?

I wonder how it would go down if you suggested dressing up at work? Because we all need joy in our days?

Or would your manager suggest you save that kind of thing for the weekend?

Yet schools are expected to facilitate it?

Is it a faith school, sometimes charities don’t align with the faith and they do other faith based initiatives to engage with the community, however WBD shouldn’t be affected. Perhaps it’s to reduce pressure on families which is fantastic as not everyone can or wants to tussle up a costume. More school are trying to align with a zero cost school day

Can't kids just turn up at school and learn stuff? Why does everything have to be craaaazzzeee fun? 🤪🤪🤪

[quote Picklequeen88]@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g wow you sound like a barrel of laughs! Lighten up! 😒[/quote]
Read the whole thread. There are lots of people explaining from first-hand experience why making WBD into a dressing up day and constantly asking parents to spend/donate money is unkind and causes stress for children, parents and staff.

@DockOTheBay Fri 04-Mar-22 18:51:47
Life is about more than just education. Fun is important, especially for kids.

Absolutely fun is important, but there's a balance to be struck. One of the really important life lessons should be how to think of others and be unselfish, and schools where there are lots of days like this are failing there. It doesn't take a huge amount of imagination to see how stressful it is for a parent on a very low income to get a letter from school blithely asking for yet another donation, or announcing yet another non-uniform day when the child has nothing presentable to wear except uniform, or a pyjama day when as so many have mentioned on this thread, they don't have pyjamas fit to be seen outside the house. Then there are the families where money is not an issue but time is, and the families with a child on the autistic spectrum who may have all sorts of issues with this break in routine, the fabric of dressing up clothes, etc etc.

And that's before we even stop to think about the environmental impact of all the cheap man-made fibre costumes that will end up in landfill.

It's fun for some families and children. It's clearly not fun at all for many others. There are other ways for children to have fun at school that don't make social exclusion of poor or neurodiverse children worse than it already is.

Very little of it seems to have anything to do with reading and encouraging a love of books.

@BarrowInFurnessRailwayStation

Can't kids just turn up at school and learn stuff? Why does everything have to be craaaazzzeee fun? 🤪🤪🤪

This is the TL:DR version of the screed I've just posted!

What a great school!!

Very respectfully to teachers, pupils and patents alike!!

One of my children hated World Book Day and refused to dress up insisting on going to school in school uniform every time. I'm sure assumptions were made but the reality is that not all children enjoy it.

My husband recalls reading an interview with a children's author who said he'd purposely created a character who always wears a t-shirt and jeans so that almost any child could dress up as this character on WBD. Unfortunately he cant remember who the author was, but maybe that will help somebody here for next year! Could almost be Harry Potter in the school holidays, if you can put a lightning mark on the forehead with a pen.

Most books that we share with children are real children in real clothes, and we encouraged our classes to use their own clothes to look as though they'd stepped out of the pages of a book. They could find a magnificent stick and be Stanley from Stanley's stick in any clothes at all; they could wear their prettiest hijab and be Rumaysa etc

The day was more about a celebration of reading and a chance to come off timetable and read in different places and spaces and talk about books.

@BeHappy91818

The school sounds crap to be honest.

Really? Fucking hell? Do you make so many sweeping judgements on so little evidence on all elements of your life?

It's not all the time though is it it's one day a year
And it's not crazzeee fun it's just a bit of dressing up and some book related activities and a book voucher.

I think the head has the right idea , there is no need for a school to ask for families to do anything for wbday .
I think it is great for books to be recognised on one day a year for the wonderful amazing things they are but a school can do this with their own resources alone .
No cost for teacher reading stories , no cost for watching the film of a book ie Matilda , Railway children , paint pictures of a book character and fill the room with them , so much could be achieved with just a bit of imagination and no cost to a family or the school , all children having the same experience of the day with no difficulty or embarrassment .
Same with bbc charity ,all that plastic crap ,hype etc i hate giving to them.
I would prefer to be asked for money as little as possible and if i am i want it to be used directly in school or given to a local charity .

It sounds like a utopia!

@AuntFlorence dressing up isn't just for one day a year though is it? If I remember correctly there are: non uniform days (bring money in), wear x colour days (bring money in), children in need (bring money in), Easter hat, Halloween, xmas jumper day and god knows how many more depending on each school. It used to cost me a fortune to send ds1 to school. Ds2's weren't so bad as his school wasn't as grabby.

@RicStar

My kids really like WBD, almost no kids wear bought costumes at their school , its a sea of anti consumerist home made items here- although its a very mixed demographic indeed. The school encourages home made costumes for cost / environmental reasons - it does require some parental engagement to get a costumes together. The kids love talking and comparing costumes and on a dull March day it was nice, fun but learning was still normal. I think its hard for schools to change from one side to the other, parents all hate change!. I dont think its wrong for OP to wish her child school did these things, but I think you have to accept all schools are different.

If anything I think this is worse. The expense and effort of hand making a costume is even more than buying one, and the type of parent who won’t (or can’t) drop £15 on a Harry Potter costume definitely won’t (or won’t be able to) research book characters to dress as, buy crafting or sewing materials, make use of clothes that can be made into something else etc.