Jo Malone candles and MIL.

[Flatdeadfrog]

I've name changed as details are a little bit outing as I've talked to friends about this.

My MIL is a bit of a scented candle aficionado and can be a bit precious about the types of scented candles she'll have in the house. That's fair enough, as you like what you like. BUT for mothers day, she has specified she wants a new scented candle for her hall.

DH likes to oblige his mum as she's actually lovely, but his default is to just buy an expensive Jo Malone candle. We don't actually have a Jo Malone budget, as we are feeling the pinch as I am on maternity leave and we're struggling a bit financially because of it.

DH and I have had an argument about it tonight, as I feel that MIL would be upset to think that we're spending our weekly food budget on an expensive candle (and frankly I think it's a waste), but DH really wants to get something nice for his mum. MIL loves scented candles, but something cheaper like a Yankee candle would just be shoved to the back of the cupboard.

AIBU to think MIL can do without a candle this year? Or can anybody recommend anything nice scent/candle wise that wouldn't get wasted like a Yankee candle would?

MIL is lovely, she would be appalled at the idea we'd spent our weekly food shop on a candle, but DH can't see past getting his mum a gift for mothers day and getting what she's asked for.

I'm a candle snob well not snob but I like GOOD ones
Seven seventeen are great and have a new Mother's Day one which is rose geranium, 100% of profits go to a mental health charity
Botanical candle company as well do gorgeous scents like greenhouse

I would recommend Beefayre, lovely scents, aesthetic, give some of their profits to bee conservation, founded and run by a lovely lady.

Pecksniffs - TK MAXX
They do loads of other brands too but this brand has great scents literally anyone would love.
Olivia Blake is another, they look very much like the jo malone ones.

Not Aldi for a gift, i’d Happily have an Asda candle for myself but not give as a present. Just remember you’ll be a MIL one day once you’ve done all the graft involved in raising your children. Get a nice brand candle from tkmaxx or BrandAlley but not Jo Malone for silly money. Remember men who’re kind to their mum are also kind to their wives

Tell her that Jo Malone is now owned by L'Oréal and buying British is a new key principle for you.

Hand over pack of flower bulbs for her to enjoy planting in the garden and say you'd been keen to hear her British scented candle recommendations once she's done the research.

Get one of your children (if they’re old enough) to make a candle or paint a picture or a candle 😂 and just give her some flowers. Don’t waste any money on a cheap candle if she’s a candle snob. Absolutely stop buying your DH’s families presents as well, no one will thank you for it in the long run.

I love jo malone but have started to by the apothecary ones from M&S, I actually think they are bettter and last longer and the scent is as strong and pure too

@Lampan thanks for that update. Just goes to show price doesn't always mean quality... we're often paying for the marketing.

She doesn’t sound lovely, she sounds like a horror. No one doesn’t know that a request for a luxury item (and she clearly wasn’t asking for an Aldi or Asda candle) for Mother’s Day is unreasonable and weird. If anything she should be telling her son to buy you a Jo Malone.

I hope DH gets you a really nice mother's day present OP. And if course he won't mind you getting your mum a jo malone candle too.

Agree white company is a good compromise.

Your husband sounds shite in your posts.

Weird that the thread title is about candles, making the thread be about candles, when it’s actually ’husband wants to take food out of our mouths to give consumer product to his mother for no reason.’
…and then getting you to wrap it, because you have a vagina and that makes it somehow your job. Good luck with that. Sounds crap.

@Flatdeadfrog just looked on ebay and loads on jo malone candles on there from around £10 including a mini set of for £20ish

I would really shop around. Jo Malone is an almighty con IME. Me and a friend spent over an hour trying all their perfume testers in store last year and concluded they mostly smelt like lavatory spray - very one note.

Your MiL not only EXPECTS a gift for Mothers Day, she also specifies what she wants? Good grief … How very sad.

@ApolloandDaphne

I love a JoMalone candle but I have recently been buying the Aldi dupes. They are fantastic and cost pennies compared to the Jo Malone ones. Get her one of them.

Really? I bought the wax melts and genuinely cannot smell anything

@rabbitwoman

Oh, I blooming love scented candles - I love the Aldi ones but not the Jo malone knock offs, they do some that are made to copy Yankee candles and the scents are fantastic.

I also hoover up all the scented candles in charity shops this time of year. There are loads of them. People get them for Christmas, don't like them, give them to Oxfam, I buy them, I have a cupboard full!!! Got a couple of £70 oka candles for £5 each once, and there are always loads of boutique brands.

But returning to your question, does your husband have any little luxuries or treats he buys for himself, such as nice whiskey or aftershave? Tell him he will have to forgo those if he wants to spend all that money on his mum.

And here is the question - does he expect you to get the candle, or order it yourself, or chose it and wrap it up? Because if you left that entirely to him, would it even happen?

Jo Malone have shops

Try Shearer candles. They are a proper candle company, they smell nice, and their new jars look up market but are only about £12. They have a store on Amazon,

@SlashBeef

Please not Aldi I have a family member that always gives Aldi beauty products and I would hand on heart prefer no gift at all. TK Maxx definitely worth a try.

Did you mean to be so snobby?

White company
Celona

If I could afford expensive candles I would get Diptyque.

The best wax melts are Don’t be a Melt.

Ebay have jo malone candles second hand new, unused xmas gifts

I know this will not be popular on a thread about candles but I think they are very dangerous and cause a lot of home fires!

I would not get a cheaper candle I would go for something else that would smell lovely and not cost a lot or potentially cause a fire.

I would definitely NOT spend the family food money on a present.

Tell your DH to sell something, as someone wise up thread said, or the kids make something.

But no, no expensive candles instead of food for family. If she complains then I would just ignore it.

Ebay "jo malond candle"

@Italiangreyhound

I know this will not be popular on a thread about candles but I think they are very dangerous and cause a lot of home fires!

I would not get a cheaper candle I would go for something else that would smell lovely and not cost a lot or potentially cause a fire.

I would definitely NOT spend the family food money on a present.

Tell your DH to sell something, as someone wise up thread said, or the kids make something.

But no, no expensive candles instead of food for family. If she complains then I would just ignore it.

You’re probably not wrong but surely that’s why every candle says ‘do not leave unattended’

For her own well being, and anyone visiting, especially babies, one of the houseplants which soaks up the formaldehyde produced would be a better present.... Trust Me Im A Doctor did a great programme about indoor pollution and the nasty chemicals released by scented candles and fresheners. Quite the eye opener