Jo Malone candles and MIL.

[Flatdeadfrog]

I've name changed as details are a little bit outing as I've talked to friends about this.

My MIL is a bit of a scented candle aficionado and can be a bit precious about the types of scented candles she'll have in the house. That's fair enough, as you like what you like. BUT for mothers day, she has specified she wants a new scented candle for her hall.

DH likes to oblige his mum as she's actually lovely, but his default is to just buy an expensive Jo Malone candle. We don't actually have a Jo Malone budget, as we are feeling the pinch as I am on maternity leave and we're struggling a bit financially because of it.

DH and I have had an argument about it tonight, as I feel that MIL would be upset to think that we're spending our weekly food budget on an expensive candle (and frankly I think it's a waste), but DH really wants to get something nice for his mum. MIL loves scented candles, but something cheaper like a Yankee candle would just be shoved to the back of the cupboard.

AIBU to think MIL can do without a candle this year? Or can anybody recommend anything nice scent/candle wise that wouldn't get wasted like a Yankee candle would?

MIL is lovely, she would be appalled at the idea we'd spent our weekly food shop on a candle, but DH can't see past getting his mum a gift for mothers day and getting what she's asked for.

I think I’ve splashed out if I buy a Yankee candle! Can’t imagine how much the jo malone ones must be. Aldi ones are lovely although I can’t see your dh going for Aldi If he won’t go for Yankee candles. Perhaps look on Etsy or not on the high street for a pretty personalised one?

Get the smaller one a pp has suggested, that's cheaper than getting flowers delivered

Oh, I blooming love scented candles - I love the Aldi ones but not the Jo malone knock offs, they do some that are made to copy Yankee candles and the scents are fantastic.

I also hoover up all the scented candles in charity shops this time of year. There are loads of them. People get them for Christmas, don't like them, give them to Oxfam, I buy them, I have a cupboard full!!! Got a couple of £70 oka candles for £5 each once, and there are always loads of boutique brands.

But returning to your question, does your husband have any little luxuries or treats he buys for himself, such as nice whiskey or aftershave? Tell him he will have to forgo those if he wants to spend all that money on his mum.

And here is the question - does he expect you to get the candle, or order it yourself, or chose it and wrap it up? Because if you left that entirely to him, would it even happen?

True Grace are beautiful candles. Made in England. They come in a tin or in glass and are very highly scented

I really like the white company scented candles, and Marks and Spencer do a pretty much exact copy.

www.thewhitecompany.com/uk/Seychelles-Signature-Candle/p/SYDCN

www.marksandspencer.com/library-of-scent-seashells-candle/p/hbp60507184

Don’t mean to be a snob but if the MIL likes Jo Malone a dupe isn’t going to cut it.

The issue is why she feels like she can demand/request expensive gifts like this when you’re feeling the pinch. My suggestion would be a lovely card and something from grandkids and that’s that. You shouldn’t go short for her candle snobbery!

Please not Aldi I have a family member that always gives Aldi beauty products and I would hand on heart prefer no gift at all.
TK Maxx definitely worth a try.

I see others have already recommended tkmaxx. That's definitely worth a scan.

This place does really lovely candles.

www.themeltco.com

The scent is so much better than jo malone, and while they aren't exactly cheap like the Aldi ones, they are a lot cheaper than her current preferences. My favourite is forest.

Yes to TK Maxx, you can get some quality candles there for great prices. Neom are cheaper than Jo Malone and smell gorgeous. They can sometimes be found at TK Maxx for less than rrp.

Freddie’s Flowers have a free offer on at the moment for free flowers. You have to cancel before the subscription starts but they’re lovely and normally retail at about £25?

White Company candles are lovely.

DO you have children? If yes ask your DH why appeasing his mother is more important than feeding them. If no then ask him whether he thinks its more important to eat or buy his mum a nice candle. If he says the latter then buy nutritious food for you and the bump and he can have beans/jam on toast for one or two weeks to make up for the spend.

St Eval - good value - handmade in Cornwall

Oh and check eBay - I got a good noem candle recently

TKMAXX is my suggestion as well
Good choice and cheap

But she is NAUGHTY for demanding what you buy

Oh gosh, here's me thinking I've spent a lot on a Yankee candle haha

How old is your LO? I’m guessing tiny if you are on may leave? I’d go for a personal keepsake- finger print / hand print art or a picture to keep, and some flowers if you can manage.

No candle is worth being hungry for, ever. Particularly if you are breastfeeding or weaning- just no. I guess she would feel the same- can you have a quiet word with her? Just hint that things are tight.

She knows how much jo malone candles are so she already knows what she's expecting you to spend.

Check out labougie.com/ I’m a particular fan of their mission fig , but they are all gorgeous !

@Cas112

Oh gosh, here's me thinking I've spent a lot on a Yankee candle haha

Snap.

TK Maxx - I love Sand and Fog candles - got a beautiful one recently - huge - 4 wicks - £13 - it's lasted 2 weeks so far and smells lovely - also looks posh!

John Lewis have a lot of nice brands which are less than the £50 a jo Malone candle is. This is £22

www.johnlewis.com/royal-botanic-gardens-kew-wild-fig-scented-candle-220g/p4875617

If he wants to buy Jo Malone and you have kids ask him if you are getting a £50 gift as well. I agree with a pp who says tell him to sell some of his stuff, cancel a subscription he has or do something else to 'save' the £50 he wants to spend on his mum.

My goodness Im not really a Candle Fan ,but cant believe how much these JM ones are! Maybe have a look on E bay or maybe DH can pay!

I am candle obsessive. What kind of fragrance does she like?

Are the £25 travel size Jo M candles too expensive? They still last for ages.

I can’t bear scented candles but the Jo M ones are subtle and the only ones that aren’t overwhelming / irritating to breathing. I would get her a small one, or something different.