To feel fed up of being poor.

[laptopba]

Just that really. Feeling rubbish about how my life has turned out in relation to finances. Its bloody shit.

And it's not just about doing well at school, it's about doing well in the right subjects. Oh if only I'd followed the STEM path

This thread has made me cry. I really feel for all of you struggling. I'm poor. Made redundant and struggling to find work, my age is a barrier sadly. I've been doing free online courses to gain qualifications. I get £324 a month to live on. My rent has just doubled and my Council Tax has risen by £6.
It seems that just as I thought I'd hit rock bottom and couldn't descend any further, someone handed me a shovel.
I don't know if this will help anyone, but local Councils usually like their Council Tax paid over 10 months. You can ask for this to be paid over 12 months instead. It's only convenience for the Council and their year end.
Also, I've just found out about BT and their Home Essentials deal, where people claiming Universal Credit can get broadband for £15. Mine is currently nearly £40 so I'm looking into that little deal! Good luck you people. Chin up, shoulders back and elbows out! x

Me to I'm utterly pissed off both myself and dh work . I've cut back on all I can think off . My eldest son hasn't had clothes apart from school clothes bought for years my youngest luckily has had hand me downs . We aren't irresponsible with money there just isn't enough to last to end of payday

@5329871e so you think many people don't try these things ? Shit happens and the best laid plans can go belly up, be appreciative its not you and don't assume that its oh so easy to get out of it
My ds is going to uni to try and stand a chance at getting a better job and a job he wants that has to have a degree so its not just for fun

I’m certainly not suggesting that anyone who’s poor it’s their fault. Not at all. People get unlucky and terrible things happen to good people. And I’m certainly not saying education is the answer, I’m not as blindly optimistic as that. I know we live in a broken society.

My point about engaging with your kids is that it’s the only way out. It’s a response to people who’ve lost hope in their own lives. It’s like if you were trapped at the bottom of a well, and somebody threw down a rope ladder. You either take it or you don’t. If you take it, it might not work out, but if you don’t take it you have to stay where you are.

Lots of people have offered advice on this thread. Some replies have been rather snide. If you want to sit and complain, don’t take the rope ladder.

@LoisLane66 of course you can be poor if you own a car , a car which you need to go to work
Your almost saying your only poor if you live in a cardboard box
When people are choosing between heating and eating thats poor , even if they do own a car
Yes some things are luxuries such as expensive phones and sky tv
But then if you pay £20 for sky as you never go out as you can't afford it , I think everyone can have one little luxury

[quote worriedatthemoment]@5329871e so you think many people don't try these things ? Shit happens and the best laid plans can go belly up, be appreciative its not you and don't assume that its oh so easy to get out of it
My ds is going to uni to try and stand a chance at getting a better job and a job he wants that has to have a degree so its not just for fun
[/quote]
Ok, good for your DS! No need to take offence at my post in that case, because it obviously wasn’t describing him.

@5329871e its a post where people can have a little moan and see that its not just them
Im pretty sure there not sat there with their kids saying , thats it kids this is how it will be for you , just accept it
But kids in poverty will often be aware of money issues and they aren't silly when they see others who have so much more they know

@5329871e but why make the comment ? People really struggling aren't going to pay for there kids to go to uni unless they think its worthwhile
Thats more likely to apply to people who can afford it without worrying

People don't want to hear what it is like to be poor. They either blame you, or rush to offer solutions that anyone with half a brain already knows.
Just stop it and let people talk about the realities.

Same, and I’m pregnant with twins! Don’t get me wrong it’s a blessing but we had only financially prepared for one. And me going back to work wasn’t an issue. Now it’s going to be pointless going back to work because I can’t afford 2 lots of childcare! And everything is just getting so expensive isn’t it? I feel like there are lots of us in the same boat.

I understand, though mine anxiety is due to supporting family.
I watched (the divine) Marcus Wareing in his smallholding on Monday on BBC and his neighbours. None of them looked as though they will worry too much about price increases. Good on them, but it’s sad that so many people have major stresses and worries.

@5329871e

I get that not every kid can be top of the class, and not everyone can earn six figures. My post was about aspiration. So many people feel trapped in poverty but they spend all their energy complaining about it and feeling depressed. You can channel that energy into your kids instead - a much more hopeful and positive way to spend it.

If your kids are academic, great! Encourage them, push them, get them careers advice.

If your kids are not academic, then foster what they’re good at, whether it’s football, carpentry or communication. Oh and they don’t need to borrow money for uni just to have an “experience” - get them some work experience that matters.

Don’t waste time/money on world book day costumes or branded snacks. Keep focused on the long game.

I get that life is hard, I really do. But you can waste your life complaining or you can do something to make sure your kids have a fresh start.

It like reading the film synopsis for a cheesy TV movie where the poor person turns it around through simply working dog hard

@5329871e on a thread last year

This is what we do with our £100K:

What would possess you to think you had a worthwhile contribution to this thread?

I get that not every kid can be top of the class, and not everyone can earn six figures. My post was about aspiration. So many people feel trapped in poverty but they spend all their energy complaining about it and feeling depressed. You can channel that energy into your kids instead - a much more hopeful and positive way to spend it.

No, I'm 'spending' the vast majority of my energy on working in a job that's physically, emotionally and mentally draining, that people pay a fortune for and I get paid the least you're allowed to legally pay someone, and I only get that for my official hours, the 4/5 hours a week that aren't on the rota, but apparently important enough for me to have to do, don't get paid.

I am depressed because it's not enough to live on, and despite it needing a certain skill set, determination, passion, drive, resilience, compassion it's written off as being unskilled and worthless, while society makes ever increasing demands and relies on it to make sure that the vulnerable people in our society are safe and cared for.

The man in the middle gets the big bucks, and oh isn't he just an inspiration for doing so well for himself....... By exploiting the users of the service and the people who work for him. What a guy.

So yeah, sometimes it gets to people and they vent, they feel a bit fed up and they moan about it.

Some of these comments come across like we're not allowed to, like we're not allowed to feel anything other than blinding optimism every second of the day about how you're going to change it for the better. Like somehow, we're worth less than the average human.

Till I got divorced I was a spoilt cow who’d waste money on stupid stuff. I was also dismissive of people who were hard up and thought they didn’t try hard enough. Now I work alongside sharp, hard working and hugely talented people who often didn’t get the best start in life, went into work life early through needing money desperately and are now stuck in poorly paid dead end jobs. You can’t save when your bus, groceries, energy etc all cost more. Poverty is a trap and it’s perfectly reasonable to be angry at the circumstances that keep you there

It’s harder now than it has been for a long time. Covid has really closed down so many options for people. It’s a slog now and I think will be for a while. We’re back to feeling like just treading water is a gain.
I’m hiding inside books n tv a lot.

@Darbs76

There’s a time I would have said that, but I worked hard to change it. Education, working my way up. Didn’t happen overnight of course and took a long time to get out of the benefit trap. I know it’s not always that easy, but might be worth looking to longer term options

Some people can try everything and work their fingers to the bloody bone working all the hours God sends, and still can't climb out of the shitty hole that life has thrown them into. Because every time they climb out, something else equally awful happens and they are back up to their necks in the shit again.

The OP really doesn't need to be told that she is in this mess because she lacks education and doesn't work hard enough.

God I know exactly how you feel! I am 67 and have been really hit hard with the whole Covid scenario (lost my lovely teaching English as a Foreign Language job as the school had to close). So now I am surviving on 2 measly pensions - I have jut enough to pay the bills, But everything is going up. The fuel prices are a joke. Thank god I don't need/want new clothes. But it is shit. I used to have and earn good money, but my savings are gone now. I just hate it. I know there are things I should be thankful for...but grinding poverty takes the lustre out of life. Sending you a big hug.

@alltheapples

People don't want to hear what it is like to be poor. They either blame you, or rush to offer solutions that anyone with half a brain already knows. Just stop it and let people talk about the realities.

Well said.

It’s like those homeless programmes where people think if I was homeless I’d get a job or do this or that. Then after 3 days no sleep, food or change of pants and a wash they realise just how hard it is to “just” improve their situation.

@laptopba I know what you mean. We had a spell years ago that was pretty awful. It stretched on for a few years. Telling the kids that we could not afford holidays except in our caravan.
The worst point was the conversation with the bank about the debt on the house, it was the 'chat' which would lead to repossession. Luckily family rallied round, they knew about the business that had failed and they did not blame me.
I hope it comes right soon for you.

Love how many posters are saying if you just did this or that you wouldn't be poor. Massively tone deaf.

Welcome to 1984. Where everyone has nothing.

What I don't understand is why people aren't kicking off and protesting about this to the government? Scotland, wales and Northern Ireland have helped their citizens with fuel costs £200 that doesn't need to be repaid and more for those in poverty.

Us in England get jack shit. It's time for things to change.

Some of these replies are very similar to the Molly-Mae we all have the same 24 hours monologue. If it were all about studying and working hard then we wouldn't have nurses using food banks would we?