To feel fed up of being poor.

[laptopba]

Just that really. Feeling rubbish about how my life has turned out in relation to finances. Its bloody shit.

@ItsCanardBruv

Despite all of my gripes, I am very lucky because I have a council house - ergo sensible rent - AND the council aren’t putting up rent/CT this year.

this is probably the biggest thing that could be done to help the poor, affordable housing and that means Council, not HA or Affordable Housing.

Its no surprise that as we have sold off council housing gone for market led rents, we ve also seen the rises in poverty.

..and whilst i'm on this subject, why is it that those on meters have to pay more for energy?

Then there is the "wage taxes" that hits the poor with tax rates that are eye watering, do extra hours and the Govt reduce benefits by 60%... a rate Billionaires do not have to pay.

How does this help people improve their lives?

@5329871e

Genuine question to everyone on this thread who feels poor. What are you doing with your kids to make sure they’re not in the same position? Are you teaching them to work hard, doing homework with them, making sure they’re top of the class and aspiring to a good career?

You may be trapped in poverty. But in the UK there’s nothing preventing your kids from earning six figures if they make the right choices from an early age and have you to guide them.

My parents were exactly where you are now. And I’m not.

I checked very piece of my children's homework until they got to GCSE level, if it wasn't good enough they did it again. I know it made them really angry but they complied and believe it or not my daughter actually thanked me when she was doing her A levels because she found it easy to apply herself. I sold what jewelry I inherited from my mum to pay for a tutor just before their A levels to make sure they did the best they could. They both went to university got good masters degrees and now both earn far more that I ever did in their early 20's. I know I was lucky that my children bought into it and worked hard but it was also hard for me to keep enforcing it whilst trying to work fulltime and manage on a very low income!

@5329871e

Genuine question to everyone on this thread who feels poor. What are you doing with your kids to make sure they’re not in the same position? Are you teaching them to work hard, doing homework with them, making sure they’re top of the class and aspiring to a good career?

You may be trapped in poverty. But in the UK there’s nothing preventing your kids from earning six figures if they make the right choices from an early age and have you to guide them.

My parents were exactly where you are now. And I’m not.

I don't agree that everyone can earn 6 figures. At the end of the day no matter how much you support your DC with their education they are not all going to be at the top of the class. And even if they are, like I was, life circumstances can hit you. For me it has been illness/disability. I can't work because of that.

It’s all very well giving advice and suggestions, which may help. Being poor can be such an emotional hardship that there’s not always the energy or head space to put anything into action. It knocks your confidence and energy every day.
I remember when I was in a pretty bad state and I yearned for someone to come and help me or give me a step up. I applied for jobs but just wasn’t getting anywhere. My fantasies revolved around someone coming across my cv and thinking ‘yes! We’ll give this person this £24k job we’ve just advertised!’
It was all I needed to pull me out but so hard to come by. Once I did, it really was all I needed and I managed to work my way up.
Some people have other obstacles like disabilities or health problems.
It really isn’t always simple and there really should be more to help.

I understand but I have no solution. It’s a societal problem. I think it’s important to understand that it’s not that you are any less, it’s a combination of a lot of factors outside of your control. The only way I’ve seen people break out if when for example in my case, my mum was stuck and I broke free after going to university. I honestly think it is incredibly difficult for people especially if you’re unwell. All you can do is whatever you can in small ways and understand that things will improve in future and it’s not your fault.

@Katya213

Been in the same place and it's friggin tough

What size are you?I've got loads of clothes stored from the last few years as I used to buy and sell a lot before covid.

Pm me your size and if I have anything I'm more than happy to post to you.

It's just sitting in storage.

With the best will in the world not everyone has the ability to be the top of the class or go to university ,my son just isn't academic he s struggled throughout school ,that doesn't mean I don't support or encourage him but you have to be realistic .

I don't think most people understand how tough it is to break free from being really poor. Most people I see that manage it do so with some family help or help from a partner.

And like someone else mentioned, every penny I have had since 18 years old has been earned. People do not understand how even small bits of help such as already having clothes suitable for interviews or being given money to buy them, helps. Or help with travel to interviews. I got an essential loan from my trade union which made a big difference to me. It was £500 and helped me do training I could never have afforded. It was a Diploma in a trade that got me out.

@Blondeshavemorefun It sounds as though being self-employed isn't working out. Would it be better to look for a job where you're working for someone else?

@upintnorth thanks, she does . I'm biased but 'm proud of her for using her imagination. Trying to make her understand the value of money I'm hoping school decide to do pjs and a book or teddy which is what they did a few years back. They've just moved world book Day until next week due to SATS this week so I'll see what they say.

For saving pennies, I try to see what cheaper brands I can do with. Some things I don't comprise on such as dh's teabags or DDs quavers however I'm quite alright with most own brand things. I do go to Aldi for my big shop then Asda for the bits I can't get at Aldi.

@StrongCoffeAvalanche. Thank you for your kind words, I just pray it gets better as my daughter gets older. My rent is £850 a month, I only earn 1500, I have all the bills and we are left with nothing for food. My mother taught me how to cook from a young age so I can make a meal that can stretch but I get so tired I just can’t be bothered.

[quote wtfisgoingonhere21]@Katya213

Been in the same place and it's friggin tough

What size are you?I've got loads of clothes stored from the last few years as I used to buy and sell a lot before covid.

Pm me your size and if I have anything I'm more than happy to post to you.

It's just sitting in storage.

[/quote]
Thank you so much, you are very kind.xx

@LetHimHaveIt brilliant, thank you. I've just looked at it. Will get involved. Thank you so much.

The problem is that the government prostitute themselves to big business as they are true capitalists. Big business pays us shit wages but puts their prices up so the cost of living is higher and finances squeezed whilst the CEO fat cats get tje cash.

Usually it’s fine. When I work I get well paid but as with many if se don’t work don’t get paid. Dd got covid so couldn’t work

The added heating food diesel costs are the same for everyone

@wherethecrawdadsare

Pleasure. I'm not a Christian, but I heard about this one a couple of years ago and it just such like such a good idea. If ever I have 'spare' money, I head over there. It might be mum who needs uniform for the kids; a woman bending over washing her clothes in the bath; a man who needs to settle a village shop debt because he's ashamed to leave the house (that one killed me). Sobering. But you feel like you're actually helping someone.

[quote liveforsummer]@ssd the mobile phone thing makes me laugh too. Complaining people on benefits have a smart phones when it's the only way to actually access benefits these days. I remember a thread where a poster thought it would be reasonable for people to get 2 busses each way to the job centre to use their computers every day to complete their 30 hours work search rather than have a smart phone. It's insane. [/quote]
Not to mention online banking to get track so you don’t get additional fees and having to authorise payments etc on the app immediately

Now all of mine are at secondary (well will be come September) I need to start looking at retraining into something better. I just don’t know where to start or what my skills are.
I did the government online thing, it gave me quite a varied response.
When I packed up my big earning (at the time) job as it wasn’t suitable for family life, I thought something would come up. In the way it did for my mum and grandmothers. But it is hasn’t and didn’t.

@elliejjtiny

Yanbu, me too. Fed up with not being able to replace our tatty furniture that doesn't match, only owning 1 pair of shoes, dh working away some weekends and knowing that in the short term we'd be better off if he didn't bother working at all.

None of my tatty furniture matches, all secondhand to start with. I have an old Ercol table (rescued on its way to the skip) which I lovingly sanded and retreated and covered the chairs. But it doesn't match the mahogany 1889 piano (inherited), or the 2 cupboards (1930s art deco looks pretty, Edwardian, functional less pretty). I had to replace the sofa 6 years ago as it was falling apart, but the curtains don't match. It's functional and I don't sit looking at the curtains so it doesn't matter. I wouldn't buy Ikea type chipboard based furniture, I don't think it's made to last. As for shoes, one plain but good quality black leather pair goes with everything and lasts a good 2-3 years.

Wouldn't do anything different, I'm just not into fashionable decor: this 'grey' spell will luckily have completely passed me by.

@ItsCanardBruv, I have kicked off at the school big time. Hopefully they will look at their policies and have a bit of humanity in their actions

To the people that think an education will keep you out of being poor, it isn't always that simple and there are a lot of factors that can happen that are out of a person's control like disability, illness etc. I worked extremely hard at school, studied to the point even my parents had to pay me to leave my room. I got great grades but due to an accident that left me permanently disabled when I was just 19, I have only been able to work for short periods of time since then and am on long term disability. I would love to have worked at the job I studied so hard for, but that's how things turned out

I grew up in a very poor family, electricity cut off regularly, no carpets, very shabby furniture, wore old school uniform in summer as nothing else, poor / sometimes no food, etc. This continued for a good chunk of adult life eg I can remember one day when it was pouring with rain, I was six months pregnant and my feet were soaking as the only pair of shoes I had were not waterproof and had holes in the soles. When you are in that position, everything is relentless, and you are totally fed up with the current situation and can’t see any prospect of it changing. I’m not going to patronise anyone currently in this position by mentioning some of the previous advice. I am not poor now but recognise a lot of my journey was luck, and any one major thing going wrong, such as health, would have put me back. Anyway, being poor all that time has made me a bit of a hoarder for my nice clothes. I have a good stock of sizes, mainly 14, 16, 18, that I will not use again and would be happy to post items (at my cost) to anyone who needs them. I realise that won’t change anyones situation, but it may mean they can spend that money elsewhere or even just have one change of clothes. Please PM me if I can post something.

@Ariela antiques are very different from tatty old cheap furniture. And I see you did replace your 6 year old sofa. We had our IKEA sofa for 19 years before we replaced it. It really is not the same as not replacing antiques.
And we have a lot of old brown wooden furniture from the 1950s and 1960s. It is very cheap, but lots of people on MN who like antiques would never have it in the house.

Ladies, I have clothes-sizes 10-12 (skirts,blouses,some jackets). All quite new and washed.
If you are able to pick them up (East London, Ilford)- pm me, more than happy to give them for someone!