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AIBU?

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Original poster

Children told about war in Russia in school

278 replies

ShepherdMoons · 28/02/2022 17:49

Dd is a sensitive soul in year 3 and today their class was told that people in Ukraine are having to leave their country with their pets for fear of being shot by Russians (this is the gist of what dd says). We haven't spoken about this at home.

AIBU to think the school shouldn't be talking to such young children about this?

OP posts:
Woollystockings · 28/02/2022 20:56

@ShepherdMoons

How? With puppets?
Don’t be so ridiculous and offensive.
BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/02/2022 20:57

@ShepherdMoons

How? With puppets?
"Mummy why did the plane crash into the building?"

"Well, darling, there is one or two people who are very very naughty and they snuck on the plane and crashed it on purpose. Its made lots of people sad and angry. It won't happen again"

"OK, mummy, look at this snot!"

KickinTheRibs · 28/02/2022 20:57

I just don’t understand people who think their children are better off sheltered from news that shapes history. Of course they should be taught about it, it should be done in an age appropriate manor but should be talked about nonetheless.

It would also be wise to throw in how privileged we are to be sleeping more soundly than the Ukrainian’s are tonight. Learning compassion and empathy doesn’t have an age limit.

ddl1 · 28/02/2022 20:57

Relatives and family friends had been refugees from the Nazis. My friend's parents had fled Hungary in 1956. And of course we all knew adults who hadn't just heard conversations about war when in primary school, but had been evacuated far from their homes and families, living among strangers while worried that mum might be killed in the Blitz or dad at the Front. Children know more than adults might like to think- even more so in these Internet days

Original poster
ShepherdMoons · 28/02/2022 20:57

I'm finding this whole thread a bit ridiculous and bizarre. There are wars ongoing throughout the world and yet we need to educate our children about a war that has been ongoing for five days and may be resolved in the next few days.

OP posts:
Ff10n · 28/02/2022 20:59

At a similar age, I was completely terrified of the nuclear threat / cold war for the best part of a couple of years. Not uncommon for kids of the early 80s. All from playground hearsay and snippets heard on the news, no parent or teacher ever mentioned it. I was too frightened to talk to any adult I knew and was pretty upset for a long time.
Looking back, I wish an adult had been there to reassure / give an accurate, age appropriate assessment of what was going on.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/02/2022 20:59

@ShepherdMoons

I'm finding this whole thread a bit ridiculous and bizarre. There are wars ongoing throughout the world and yet we need to educate our children about a war that has been ongoing for five days and may be resolved in the next few days.
How many other current/recent wars happened in our continent and involved potential nuclear deterrents?
kittensinthekitchen · 28/02/2022 20:59

@ShepherdMoons

I'm finding this whole thread a bit ridiculous and bizarre. There are wars ongoing throughout the world and yet we need to educate our children about a war that has been ongoing for five days and may be resolved in the next few days.
No, we clearly don't.
Original poster
ShepherdMoons · 28/02/2022 21:00

@BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz doesn't that just show that your explanation of 9/11 to a three year old means zilch to them if they are then just thinking about their snot? I'm not sure if that really helps.

Also, will they want to get on a plane after hearing that (if the message does go in)?

OP posts:
brainhurts · 28/02/2022 21:01

Hi op I'm sure a yr 3 teacher is able to explain in an age appropriate way , they do it all the time . I would rather my child know the facts of what's happening . It's far better they know the truth rather that pick up bits in the playground.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 28/02/2022 21:01

No it just shows that they work on facts and then move on.

Same happened when I explained my period to 2yo dd when she was curious as to why I left blood in the toilet when I did a wee.

Kids (especially dinky ones) need short simple factual responses which then just become known info and they move on.

oncemoreunto · 28/02/2022 21:01

OP, this is a war in Europe the same continent that you live in.
Many schools will have dc who are impacted in some way.
It is a very significant event.

It is entirely appropriate that schools help dc process what is happening.

If you have a solution to sort this out in the next couple of days you need to share it OP.

Original poster
ShepherdMoons · 28/02/2022 21:01

@Ff10n you see i was pig ignorant as a child and had no idea about the nuclear threat. Happy as a pig in muck and no idea about nuclear bombs, I am so glad I didn't know all about it. Plenty of time to be responsible and conscientious as an adult.

OP posts:
impossible · 28/02/2022 21:03

YABU. Definitely better to talk about it. Your dd will hear talk if it anyway so preferable it's discussed in a school environment.

Original poster
ShepherdMoons · 28/02/2022 21:03

@oncemoreunto you'll be the first to find out for sure. I will consult with my team of well informed 10 year olds and then have a chat with Putin. Sorted.

OP posts:
oncemoreunto · 28/02/2022 21:04

To be fair OP I'm sure your 10 year old would do a better job of it than Putin!

WindyKnickers · 28/02/2022 21:05

I deliberately sat my DC (yr 2 and yr 6) down this weekend and we watched a few episodes of newsround specifically after a thread on here. I tend not to have the news on much at home, mostly because it's depressing shit about covid, but it's important kids know what's going on in the world. They both wanted to talk about Putin (or Poo-Tin as DS likes to call him) and what the heck he's playing at. We've looked at maps of the region and discussed some if the history of the soviet Union and parallels with WW2 (DD is covering this in year 6 at the moment). Neither of them have particularly wanted to focus on the impact of this on individuals in the region but I try and gently help them recognise the wider issues.

Hugasauras · 28/02/2022 21:05

It absolutely does a disservice to your child not to educate and arm them to combat misinformation in the playground/elsewhere. Not being informed properly is what makes children anxious, not being supported and having things explained and being able to ask questions about it. Hearing half-truths and not feeling able to discuss with a parent is far worse than having an age-appropriate understanding of world events.

We need to respect our children enough to educate them. Not informing children is not protecting them. Quite the opposite. Protection comes from knowledge and the security that your parents will tell you the truth and that you can discuss your worries.

MyDcAreMarvel · 28/02/2022 21:05

@Woollystockings they are very educated and likely know more world events than most schooled children. They are however taught things in an age appropriate way.

KickinTheRibs · 28/02/2022 21:06

I’m afraid OP, given your replies I’m not surprised your happy with the ignorance your bestowing on your child, because you sound mighty ignorant too.

This is major news, what will you tell DD if a NATO country is invaded by Russia and we are then obliged to be involved? Will you still keep her sheltered from that although the likely hood is we will be directly affected in some way?

Children don’t need puppets to understand, they just need decent and willing parent(s) it’s not so ironic you haven’t grasped that.

plantastic · 28/02/2022 21:06

We deliberately watched newsround with our year 3 to explain it (we don't live in the UK so it doesn't just come on). She gets it anyway, as my job is conflict related so there's a reasonable amount of chat at home anyway, but much better is covered by school in a child appropriate way.

'How to fit a whale in a suitcase' is a fab book for younger children on leaving your home. 'The journey' is another good one.

This stuff shapes people as well. I really remember the 'big news' of childhood- first gulf War, Hillsborough, the Siege of Sarajevo. You need to allow them to experience what is happening to become engaged global citizens.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 28/02/2022 21:06

I've asked my DD 9 today and she hasn't been told anything but I mentioned what it was and she started talking about something else although it's her birthday so she's a bit distracted but if school mentions it it's fine. They watch newsround in school anyway.

Hugasauras · 28/02/2022 21:07

And what we did and didn't know 30 years ago is irrelevant. Information is everywhere now. It moves fast, is accessible on so many platforms. Treating children like they were born in an age of no internet, barely any TV news coverage, no devices, where people aren't instantly informed about major events isn't really feasible.

Twofurrycats · 28/02/2022 21:09

It is far, far better to have discussions in an age appropriate way with the teacher than let playground whispers run.

TicTacHoh · 28/02/2022 21:11

[quote ShepherdMoons]@Ff10n you see i was pig ignorant as a child and had no idea about the nuclear threat. Happy as a pig in muck and no idea about nuclear bombs, I am so glad I didn't know all about it. Plenty of time to be responsible and conscientious as an adult.[/quote]
I don't see that you've moved on from this, tbh. Why post in AIBU if you are only going to argue you are NBU in the face of almost unanimous feedback otherwise.