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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Drag Queen at a Primary School - continuation thread here - https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/4490413-Drag-Queen-at-a-Primary-School-Thread-2?watched=1

999 replies

Lennyllama · 23/02/2022 11:22

What are your views on a drag queen visiting a primary school for the day? Think thigh high leather boots with short revealing dresses and a dance show. The drag queen spent the day at school. Did a show for KS2 and then went around to individual classes to read a story book. The school had a themed dress up day. The theme was This is Me. Parents were not informed that this would be happening and were not given the option to opt in or out of the experience. The school has a very diverse mix of cultures and religions. This particular queen is easily found online, the kids were told their stage name and their content is rather steamy.

YANBU- It’s inappropriate
YABU- It’s appropriate

I have name changed for this.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
39
StoneofDestiny · 23/02/2022 15:40

Most school visitors are meant to be role models - Is this visitor meant to encourage children to be drag queens.

Absolutely out of order.

RegardingMary · 23/02/2022 15:40

It seems ridiculous and in no way fits the theme.

The whole point of a drag queen is they're being something else, and generally sexualiaing/fetishising them.

Pisces89 · 23/02/2022 15:40

YANBU. I would not be happy.

Bintymcbintface · 23/02/2022 15:41

not using a group of people who request to be referred to as 'she/her/Miss' umm they're a character...

mummykel16 · 23/02/2022 15:43

@Bintymcbintface

A form of entertainment about exclusivity is a waste of resources? Could it be that because "drag queens are everywhere right now" that schools are taking a different approach and using what's around in the media to help get messages across? I notice not one person complaining about my comment has mentioned the difference between panto and drag that makes one OK and not the other.
Choice, attire, sexual nature of it etc
VeryLongBeeeeep · 23/02/2022 15:43

umm they're a character...

So not a shining example of the message of "This Is Me" then, eh? Or real diversity?

sst1234 · 23/02/2022 15:44

Yet more agenda pushing into kids. It’s scary and dystopian. If parents don’t get schools to stop, this will continue to get worse.

CIaireFraser · 23/02/2022 15:44

I notice not one person complaining about my comment has mentioned the difference between panto and drag that makes one OK and not the other

That's been covered upthread.

In theatre men have always taken female roles. The pantomime dame is the legacy of that. The clothes they wear are not hypersexualised, they are not called things like FloJob. The name of their character is usually derived from the original story eg Widow Twanky. Their act is not aimed at adults, and th actor who plays them is not an adult entertainer on the side.

Can you spot the difference?

demoness · 23/02/2022 15:44

YANBU. I can't imagine a female stripper being invited into a primary school and being asked to perform a show and read to children while wearing a revealing outfit. I don't see how this is any different. There are ways to teach children about diversity without involving sexualised entertainers.

CIaireFraser · 23/02/2022 15:45

Apologies - I meant men traditionally took female roles.

Bintymcbintface · 23/02/2022 15:46

@mummykel16 did the show have any kind of explicit or sexual content or is OP just in a flap because her dc saw a man in a dress?

mummykel16 · 23/02/2022 15:46

@Bintymcbintface

A form of entertainment about exclusivity is a waste of resources? Could it be that because "drag queens are everywhere right now" that schools are taking a different approach and using what's around in the media to help get messages across? I notice not one person complaining about my comment has mentioned the difference between panto and drag that makes one OK and not the other.
Add to that the total disregard for safeguarding
mummykel16 · 23/02/2022 15:49

[quote Bintymcbintface]@mummykel16 did the show have any kind of explicit or sexual content or is OP just in a flap because her dc saw a man in a dress?[/quote]
Best answer to that would be can the children and staff wear such trash!

Bintymcbintface · 23/02/2022 15:51

@ClaireFraser a drag queen going into a primary school isn't going to be doing an explicit act, just because some drag queens do doesn't mean that they all do or that they don't tailor their performances for their audiences. Unless there's proof that the DQ mentioned in the OP did an explicit performance or had overly enhanced "assets" I truly don't see what the fuss is about. (no a sparkly dress a la Britney spears doesn't count as offensive) "I don't like it, I don't like drag queens" doesn't really cut it as a valid argument against it

Liveandkicking · 23/02/2022 15:51

Inappropriate - why would I want my children to get such a regressive image of femininity.

OnceUponAWhine · 23/02/2022 15:52

@Bintymcbintface

My word people here really are very close minded and uppity. I presume none of you have ever taken your DC to pantomimes etc that grotesque widow twanky being a horrible parody of a woman and all that. Drag isn't exclusively "adult entertainment" and the clothing wasn't particularly offensive, if they'd had giant boobs hanging out and a massive strap on then yeah I'd be pissed off. Besides that it's highly unlikely that a paid performer going into a primary school would be doing an explicit act unless they're complete idiots. Get the bees out of your bonnets, let go of those pearls and chill the fuck out
I clearly don’t live in an area served by DQ led after school clubs and Children’s party venues with a resident DQ as a party host…

Any visitor to a primary school who would ordinarily be employed by a venue/company targeting adults (I.e. adult entertainment) should have to seek permission from parents/carers to meet their children. This would apply to school visitors from technology companies, or even religious leaders.

Bintymcbintface · 23/02/2022 15:52

Where's the safeguarding problem?! My good god yall are nuts

Tdcp · 23/02/2022 15:53

Sorry I haven't rtft but I'm friends with 2 drag queens. Under no circumstances would I want them doing a show of any kind for my 7 year old and her peers ..in fact I'm sure they'd think it was bonkers they were asked in the first place. I'm going to ask them later to see what my friends opinions are on this! There's some weird obsession with children's boundaries and drag queens lately. Drag is adult entertainment.

Beefcurtains79 · 23/02/2022 15:54

Y’all?

SnowFlo · 23/02/2022 15:54

It would depend on the Queen and what the show was like, what they wore, what their name was etc.

I think they should try and source Queens with a name that isn't alluding to anything rude or sexual, and tell them to tone down the outfits a bit, but still wear all the hair and makeup. They can wear women's clothes but not overly stripper-like. They could make a dance routine specifically for when they are performing at schools.

They could even just give a more child-friendly name to the kids at the school, which would keep their adult-appropriate acts hidden from them.

I don't think thigh-highs are wrong on their own, or fishnets for example. It's the whole thing with the performance and the name.

Mummyoflittledragon · 23/02/2022 15:54

@Bintymcbintface
There was nothing misogynistic or sexist about the Kevin and Perry characters. For the purposes of the entertainment and the show, it is totally irrelevant that Perry was depicted by a woman.

The character was so convincing that I didn’t know for quite some time that Perry was played by a woman. There is no power dynamic in women dressing as and playing males.

Both Kevin and Perry were exaggerations of a teen boys, nothing more. Certainly not grotesque.

irene9 · 23/02/2022 15:55

I'd be annoyed. Drag Queens tend to conceptualise women in a certain way. Usually in a dolled-up, sexualised way.

There's plenty of other parts to women that don't seem to get expressed through Drag.

That's what annoys me about Drag Queenism in general.

If the school had gotten in a woman dressed like that, all hell would break loose. 'Why is that woman dressed as an exotic dancer in revealing outfit and kinky boots reading stories to our kids?'
But for a man wearing a revealing outfit and kinky boots it's suddenly 'expressing' themselves.

Another example of men being treated differently - even when dressed as women!!

AKASammyScrounge · 23/02/2022 15:56

I think the salient point here is not Drag Queens as such. They haven't broken down the doors to the schools to get in; they were invited by school staff. Parents were not informed of an extremely controversial visit when they should have been.
The person to be tackled about this is the HT who must have OKd it. She had no right to impose her woke views on children and absolutely no right to bypass parents' consent. She has broken trust with the parent body and should be held to account.

Rosehugger · 23/02/2022 15:56

Are the school on glue?

WeBuiltCisCityOnSexistRoles · 23/02/2022 15:59

@Lennyllama I think if you put up the photos that are on this DQ's website, people who think YABU (and that we are all fun sucking uptight close minded pearl clutches Hmm) might actually be educated and realise the problems.

I'm glad this isn't in FWR as the more people who are aware of the lack of safeguarding associated with this total fucking bullshit, the better.