To have COMPLETELY lost my work mojo?

[backintothefire]

I don't know what to do! I have completely lost all motivation for work these days and am really struggling to complete even the most basic tasks. I feel hugely resentful about work and dread Monday every week. Nothing about my work interests me or inspires me any more.

I used to love my job! But now every day is a slog and I hate it. I changed jobs a few months ago thinking it might re-invigorate me - NOPE! In fact now I feel even worse because it's clearly me that's the problem, not the job itself.

I honestly feel like I can't keep doing this. I've got 20+ years until retirement ffs. Anyone else feel the same? What's the solution?!

Can you make a plan to retire at 60? Personal pension, AVCs, etc as appropriate? Even semi retire then and do a few days of low stress work. I keep a spreadsheet of how much I am adding every month / how much my work pension is increasing and so can see the money benefits for the future too.

There is no solution sadly. Only things that can act as sticking plasters. A lot of us are stuck like hamsters on the wheel and especially if you have children.

I'm the same.
Mid thirties so not at all the right time to cut back work wise - I should be driving forwards right now, accelerating my career but I'm in a rut.
I can't even blame burnout myself, as work has been fairly quiet recently.
I am desperately trying to pull my socks up, before I completely sabotage my reputation at work (I used to be quite conscientious and hardworking!)

I wrote a post similar to this last year and got sent this link which I’ve shared a few times before here because it’s just been so helpful

theantiburnoutclub.com/how-to-get-motivated-to-do-anything-14-ways-to-get-and-stay-motivated/

I was diagnosed with extremely high stress levels and work related burnout late last year and have been using that site and CBT therapy to get a handle on it. It’s not all the way there yet but I do feel so much better and am at least back to work (although on a part time basis at the moment after being signed off).

Do you have an occupational health team or department at your work OP?

It’s utterly shite though and I wouldn’t wish this feeling on my worst enemy

@Yazoop I definitely think the last 2 years haven't helped, and the current feeling that the world is going to hell in a handbasket does seem to make risky decisions seem even more unattractive. Like it's a choice between (limited) financial security / buffer against the world and happiness...

HRT helped me - but really the solution for me is to think it pays the bills and pays for me to do nice things in my time off. And I make sure I take all my holidays.

I'm also going to drop to 4 days a week next year.

@Someonemustknowtheanswer
Agree, all my suggestions are basically sticking plasters. Another one is adding omega 3 and turmeric supplements. Cuts out the joint pains so at least not adding physical misery to the pot.

There was a thread on MN a few years ago. The gist was:

Lawyers wanted to do something meaningful (teaching)
Teachers thought about nursing
Nurses thought about office work
Office workers thought law.

Etc.

A lot of public sector jobs come with that mantel of doing something useful.. which is a burden.

Office work project managing a cake factory is still useful. It's just a job that primary school children couldn't name.

OP, I could have written your post. I’m 48 and wondered if it was a symptom of menopause. Lack of oestrogen is maybe making me give no fucks about anything?

I miss the old passion I used to have for my job. I miss finding the work engaging and interesting. I miss feeling like me. Now I feel everything is like a faded photograph. I joke that I stay doing my job from inertia as I can’t be arsed to find a new job. The reality is, I don’t have any interest in another job.

If anyone has any ideas for how to get out of this funk I would LOVE to hear them.

I don't know if this is good advice. But what helped me was having my own set of 'objectives' separate to my work objectives. Things like going for a run 3 lunchtimes a week, spending 2 hours a week of work time learning a new professional skill (in fairness, work don't mind me doing this as it's job related, I've just always neglected my own personal development in the past), finishing early on a Wednesday and doing something I enjoy. I have a very flexible job and so my objectives reflect the need to maximise that benefit. It gives me things to look forward to during the week.

I am 40 and I have ALWAYS felt this way about work. I have never had a job that inspired me or that I enjoyed, it's always been something I resent having to do.

If it helps, I just have this sort of dull acceptance about it. I don't think "is this it?" and panic about the futility of it all. Rather, I just think "meh" and go through the motions and that sort of gets me through.

I feel exactly the same, I have lost any motivation to do any work at all.

It has all been exacerbated by the pandemic.
I think a lot of people are potentially suffering some form of mild depression or poor mental health as a result of the past two years. Not enough for it to make us realise that's what it is, but just enough to impact us.
The loss of varied human contact I think has been a big element. I still work exclusively from home so for the most part I have been with one other person 24/7 for the past almost 2 years, with only occasional days where I see friends.
I'm hoping as life starts to be fully back to normal, things will improve again.

In the short term, arrange a day out or trip sonewhere every month or two. At least there is something to look forward to. In the longer term, a holiday abroad. If you book miles in advance you may get an offer and it is something to look forward to.

Would work give you a few weeks unpaid leave? Would there be a reason eg caring for a relative, child doing exams where you could take a month or two sabbatical? Unsure if that is possible.

If you can't take leave could you ask to move departments at work, do some training. Sonetimes a change of role may motivate you again.

In the longer term, look at putting extra into a pension, maybe take in a lodger, so you can retire at 60. I don't know if a lodger is possible for everyone.

@garlictwist “a sort of dull acceptance” is a good way to view it. I’ve honestly tried everything including therapy, CBT, mindfulness, new hobbies, exercise, losing a lot of weight, supplements etc. These have all helped with the quality of life outside work but are only “sticking plasters” for work hours. It does all help with general mental health though so there is a marginal benefit for work.

Yeah my life outside of work is fine, I'm pretty happy generally and don't think I'm depressed or anything. I just get a frustrated, slightly panicky sinking feeling whenever work is involved.

It's so depressing to think that 'a sort of dull acceptance' is the future though. I don't expect to bound out of bed in excitement at the thought of the working day but fuck me, there must be something better than this!

Obviously I won't comment on health matters but this is happening a lot. Partly a reaction to Lockdowns, which have affected us all differently.

Some sleep patterns have been changed, more insomnia and episodic sleep.
I have found difficulty in concentrating on reading. I turn a page and forget to previous content.
The first stage of motivation is "wanting to" do or go whatever.
It's damn difficult at times.

I feel exactly the same and I am in my dream job. Pandemic exhaustion and perimenopause probably at root. However, I have just started reading Emma Howarth's workbook, A Year of Mystical Thinking (she wrote it after a mini-breakdown a couple of years ago) and if you are even vaguely into, or open-minded to, a low level of woo, it's well worth a look. I'm already feeling calmer and more focused that I have done for a long, long time. It's a kind of British version of Eat, Pray, Love for normal working mums. Hope you get your mojo back soon.

I'm the same, but I'm not sure it's a menopause thing - based on the conversations with mid-40s to mid 50s men at work! It seems to be a general affliction with both sexes in mid-life. But then my workplace is very unhappy right now.

Working from home has taken away the social side of work, and some of the politeness of the office environment. So things feel like you are a 'work unit'. Especially because my employer is struggling.

Gosh, there are so many of us feeling the same way. ☹️

I think it’s your age Op. I’m 47. I started HRT at Christmas it’s not been magical transformation but I feel a bit better. I think the less tolerance is age related too. For me fresh air/walks help, eating better.

I have dropped to 4 days a week from 5, and I prefer it. I've never particularly liked any job I've done TBH, and I'm just not that fussed about developing a career really - as long as the bills are paid and I get time to myself/with my children that's what really matters. We're not here for very long, and it's important to get the balance right.

Money is a lot, but it's not everything. I think people/society place too much emphasis on work, and work relations. It's all a load of bollocks, none of that matters. It's not real life. No-one honestly gives that much of a fuck about you at work, but you are very very precious to you children and your family. I could walk out of my job tomorrow and I'd be easily replaced. I know that, so I'm not going to break my back trying to win medals from people who wouldn't remember my name in a month's time if I were to leave.

If you can, drop your hours, re-direct your mind towards something else, outside of work. What do you enjoy? What did you enjoy perhaps in the past that you haven't had a chance to do since forever? Allow yourself some time to re-align your focus. Are you creative? Do you enjoy walking? Perhaps you could join a local hobby group and be firm with yourself about attending!

You sound like you need to do this. Your job is not who you are, it's a part of who you are. Rediscover the other, important parts of yourself & you'll be happier!

It's because going to work is shit. It just is.
You get up at 6. You get home at 6 or later. You're exhausted or have to ferry kids around.
The wages that, last year, meant you had some left over for fun stuff, no longer last. So You're basically just working to pay bills, at a time when you thought you'd finally made it through the childcare years and would be able to enjoy it. And You're wondering how the fuck you'll afford uni in a few years time.
You've done the years of putting your all into work and realised that the outcome is the same. You can't drop down, because you're only just getting through the cost of living as it is.

@Coldgreenman

You've done the years of putting your all into work and realised that the outcome is the same.

Exactly this. So maybe you need to address your input.

I agree a lot of people are feeling like this - partly I think this is how you feel at this time in your life/career maybe? Esp if you have kids/rent/mortgage/committments - a bit stuck? Plus the added impact of lockdowns/covid/WFH/everything being a bit shit! I like the advice of someone upthread (sorry can't link) about maximising/making the most of work. I've been for a run this morning (it helps I'm p/t) but I'm going to try and diary in lunch time walks/runs as exercise is the first thing to go when I feel like this, I can never be bothered to start up again but I know it will make me feel better. And I am definitely going to get my arse into gear with getting on a training course (planning my exit strategy potentially 🤣) also trying to have something planned in the diary to look forwards to - holiday, visiting friends, trips out etc). I think this time of year is the worst also OP.... I'm hoping I'll feel better once spring is on its way/nights are lighter/can do a bit more outside at weekends etc?

I think Yazoop has it - COVID, working from home, some losing their jobs and businesses and furlough has meant many people reassessing their lives.

I closed a successful business, took on caring responsibility for an elderly relative and am in the process of moving house.

I am wholly reliant on another person financially for the first time since 17.

I need to find a way of earning money and being able to continue caring responsibilities for half the week. Once our house move is out of the way I'll be sitting down with a notebook and pen and starting to make some life lists.

It's quite a scary position to be in mid fifties but I am determined to make a good (even better) life going forward.