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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu to ask what you got for Valentines day?

434 replies

3Daddy31982 · 14/02/2022 18:00

I got a lobster biscuits and multicoloured rose, bunch of red roses in a vase, a valentines day balloon, a balloon that's red and says love. Also Indian tea x

OP posts:
Goldenbear · 15/02/2022 09:27

Comedycook so why comment at all on a thread with the title asking what you got on Valentines day as you didn't get anything! My husband will always buy me meals out, a coffee, toiletries etc. It is second nature to him but having the day marked out is something to focus on for sketching a card for me, it is the same for our anniversary and I am a romantic- he knows this and I would have been really shocked if he suddenly stopped marking Valentines day after 15 years of being together!

Rubyupbeat · 15/02/2022 09:29

A card and a car Flowers

Goldenbear · 15/02/2022 09:30

I agree AllOfUsAreDead, it lacks imagination if you can't understand why some people might mark the day.

SirChenjins · 15/02/2022 09:44

@Scalottia - no, I wasn’t referring to you. Apologies, I should have quoted the poster.

@Goldenbear - ‘nothing, because we don’t celebrate it/we’re saving for x/I think it’s commercial nonsense is a perfectly acceptable and valid response to the OP.

ThackeryBinks · 15/02/2022 09:48

Valentines was a big deal this year because DD1 was going official with her boyfriend who was scattering rose petals and having beautiful cakes made. DP got me and DD2 roses and bought us a takeaway. The fact that he considered DD2's feelings means a lot to me.

Scalottia · 15/02/2022 09:50

No problem @SirChenjins :)

Lsquiggles · 15/02/2022 09:59

I got some earrings I'd been looking at for a while and we went for an Indian. I got him some coffee ice cream from our local farm shop as he never wants anything Grin

worriedatthemoment · 15/02/2022 10:01

@Goldenbear but its not a technical point aibu is mire brutal , chat would of got less people
But why is anyone bothered anyway , if you do it and enjoy it why care what someone else thinks
People will always disagree
But there have been snide comments from both sides

MrTumblesSpottyHag · 15/02/2022 10:06

An hour together after work before we had to get back for the kids. We went to look at tents and got a kfc. I wouldn't want anything else 😁

AledsiPad · 15/02/2022 10:06

Cystitis. I got Cystitis. Sad

ConsuelaHammock · 15/02/2022 10:07

Nothing

Butteryflakycrust83 · 15/02/2022 10:22

We took the day off work and moved the TV to the bedroom so we could lay in bed, watch movies, nap and eat chocolate. He also cooked an incredible steak lunch.
We have an 19 month old this was absolute luxury for us while she was in nursery!

Seasidemumma77 · 15/02/2022 10:30

My DP is not romantic, doesn't make verbal declarations of love, but yesterday he once again showed he really does know me buy giving me an expensive bottle of flavoured vodka that I'd seen a few months ago.

MrsToothyBitch · 15/02/2022 10:33

A lovely card, a selfie ring light for my dressing table because he'd noticed the light in our bedroom is a problem when I do my make up, and a weighted blanket to snuggle under when he's working away.

I got him a card, some new pj bottoms, a little animal face sleep mask & some chocolate . I also got him/us the Hotel Chocolat dipping adventure thing- we'll have it when we fancy it though.

We also have a bon-bon bowl which I filled with heart shaped chocolates. He's running us a bath later- I was too poorly last night- and will light some cute votive candles we got as an engagement present. We try & do stuff like that occasionally anyway but valentines is a nice excuse.

Goldenbear · 15/02/2022 10:56

worriedatthemoment the point is there shouldn't be 'both sides' as the question wasn't, 'do you celebrate Valentine's day?', it was asking what people received. It's irrelevant with that question what peoples' thoughts are on whether it is a tacky celebration and there should be no 'sides'. Posters have come on the thread to offer their patronising wisdom on the 'commercial' application to romance, suggesting their relationship is some how superior for it when in fact that is probably not the case and it more comes down to not being arsed!

Goldenbear · 15/02/2022 10:58

And Chat would not have got fewer patronising posters.

DarleneSnell · 15/02/2022 10:59

We exchanged cards and chocca, plus I got fizz and flowers. We put the kids in bed a bit earlier and had a nice dinner at home.

@Butteryflakycrust83 sounds amazing!! When you have little kids, cosy bed time during the day is the greatest gift of all!

SirChenjins · 15/02/2022 11:01

@Goldenbear

worriedatthemoment the point is there shouldn't be 'both sides' as the question wasn't, 'do you celebrate Valentine's day?', it was asking what people received. It's irrelevant with that question what peoples' thoughts are on whether it is a tacky celebration and there should be no 'sides'. Posters have come on the thread to offer their patronising wisdom on the 'commercial' application to romance, suggesting their relationship is some how superior for it when in fact that is probably not the case and it more comes down to not being arsed!
And again, ‘nothing because we don’t celebrate it/we’re saving for x/we think it’s commercialised nonsense’ is also a perfectly valid response to ‘what did you get’.

If you celebrate it and enjoy the day then the above responses shouldn’t have any impact on your happiness whatsoever.

Envoitrevisage · 15/02/2022 11:09

I got flowers and a bar of chocolate, I bought expensive steak and made all the best things to go with it. We drank some wine. Or I did, he had a few sips and went to work on his night shift Grin

Goldenbear · 15/02/2022 11:33

'Nothing' is a valid post but 'commercialised nonsense' is patronising and you are deliberately making that point to mark yourself out as intellectually superior, that is literally the point in posting that remark. It has no bearing on my enjoyment of the day, what are you on about, I'm just calling out the underhand behaviour for what it is - a bit pathetic

SirChenjins · 15/02/2022 12:04

It’s absolutely fine to say it’s commercialised nonsense if that’s how you feel about it - that doesn’t mean that anyone is attempting to be ‘intellectually superior’, it is simply a different opinion about the day (which is a commercial event like all the rest) and not underhand or worth getting defensive about.

UniBallEye · 15/02/2022 12:32

We're together over 20 years and we're still (privately) very romantically soppy about each other.
We always do Valentine's cards and usually get an M&S meal deal etc and have wine / bubbles. The cards have heartfelt messages and I have all mine from over the years.

This year we went out for a really excellent meal over the weekend and we're going on a city break next weekend so we decided just to do cards this year.

I cooked us a special meal which he and dd love but it takes ages to make and is not usually a Monday night thing. He opened the wine and cleaned everything up after the dinner. We cuddled on the sofa and watched a movie.

Each couple does things differently but for us, we have always made an effort to keep the couple thing going. It's important to us. We spend a lot of time together and we regualarly go away / out for meals etc so it's not all just once-a-year on Valentines Day. But we do like to mark those occasions too when they occur.

We make a fuss on Mother's Day / Father's Day / Birthdays and Christmas as well as random days throughout the year.

Each to their own but I personally would not like to be in a relationship where we never celebrated any of those things or made a fuss of each other. It feels joyless to me.

VodselForDinner · 15/02/2022 12:34

The amount of Valentine’s Day fans who spent Valentine’s night arguing with people who don’t celebrate is quite amusing.

Sweetlikejollof · 15/02/2022 12:41

@SirChenjins

It’s absolutely fine to say it’s commercialised nonsense if that’s how you feel about it - that doesn’t mean that anyone is attempting to be ‘intellectually superior’, it is simply a different opinion about the day (which is a commercial event like all the rest) and not underhand or worth getting defensive about.
Nobody asked for anyone’s opinion on the day, though. It’s wholly unsolicited unpleasantness.

It’s rude and unnecessary to rubbish something that other people clearly enjoy. Most adults understand this. Anyone who claims not to, is either being disingenuous or displaying poor social skills.

So, no, it’s not ‘absolutely fine’ to come to a thread that is clearly about something that doesn’t interest you and she unpleasant about said thing. Should you decide to do so, it will be remarked upon.

TomorrowsPrincess · 15/02/2022 12:49

What is with all the bitter replies??

It's a bit of bloody fun and so what if men want to go get the woman they love a bunch of flowers and a naff card..... even if it is only once a year..... doesn't mean there is anything wrong with the relationship.
'We dOnT NeEd VaLEnTiNeS To SHoW OuR LoVe' 😂😂😂
Neither do most relationships but a bunch of flowers and chocs on a cold miserable Monday evening is nice!

Have a nice night in your separate bedrooms won't ya?!
😂😂😂