To let my 8 year old have a snack supply in her room?

[jilllanguage]

My DD is 8 and a couple weeks ago she asked if she could have a snack supply in her bedroom. I said yes but she still needed to ask if she was going to have any out of it. It's unhealthy snacks, mainly chocolate I admit.

She's had it a few weeks and most of it is still there. The bits she's had she has asked me and I've said it's fine. She likes to set it up all nice and just know it's there more than anything I think.

When she told her dad though he phoned me saying there is no need for it and it's encouraging bad eating habits. He thinks she's too obsessional with food as it is at my house. I suppose he does have a point. She is always thinking about what she'll eat next.

However, she's not overweight at all, she's very active, she eats her vegetables (fruit not as keen on), she will leave breakfast/lunch/dinner/dessert/yogurt etc on her plate so she knows when she is full, in fact she never finishes a full meal to be honest.

I don't see a problem with the snack box, if she was eating it without permission etc then I'd take it away but she's not.

AIBU?

@daisypond

I honestly think the idea of a snack cupboard in a child’s bedroom is insane. I can’t believe some people think it’s OK. Or to have a fridge in a bedroom. Just why?

Why not? Why is one persons way the right or only way?

Snacking isn’t something to be encouraged, though. It’s not a normal eating pattern - not if those snacks are crisps and chocolate. It shouldn’t be normalised for a child.

@daisypond

Snacking isn’t something to be encouraged, though. It’s not a normal eating pattern - not if those snacks are crisps and chocolate. It shouldn’t be normalised for a child.

I've already said on this thread that my from 8/9 my DC had/still have snack drawers. The older 2 are adults now, and they never had issues with weight gain, overeating, cavities, or a weird relationship with food.

Obviously I wouldn't do it for tiny ones, but DD11 has a little snack drawer and a tiny fridge for water/juice or an occasional can of pop.

It's nice when they have friends over to be able to share a few snacks with them in their room rather than coming down and asking every time. Also if the drawer gets emptied before the end of the week (which rarely happens), then it doesn't get refilled until the Saturday when I do my shop.

Surely you can see that it gives them a little bit of independence where they think they're in control when in actuality it's a great way of monitoring snacking and keeping it at a reasonable age appropriate level.

I also think you're imagining a drawer heaving with goodies but in reality it's a few kitkats maybe a couple of bags of crisps or popcorn, maybe some bubble gum or Haribo. It makes them happy and it's really not a big deal in the great scheme of things.

This definitely sounds like something she has watched on YouTube, there is all sorts of stuff like this on there.

I don't really see the harm in it tbh, if she is not just eating it all, its quite sweet really.

My brain must be more evolved then.

Not ever felt as if its a competition. Been taught from an early age the idea of fairness and sharing.

How adorable. No it isn't. You have just, as you say, been socialised into sharing more.

Having been raised differently to you (including learning not to make directly contradictory statements on after the other ), my husband and I have come up with a simple way to manage our different eating habits without affecting the other person's impulses. No idea why you feel superior about that.

DD has always had free access to all food types. She keeps sweets and chocolate in her room. She has never over eaten, is sporty, active and not overweight. When her friends who are limited in what and when they can eat get access to junk food they scoff way too much. Thus far my experiment is a success and DD doesn't see food as good, bad, or a treat, just something she may fancy.

DD has always had free access to all food types. She keeps sweets and chocolate in her room.

But why keep it in her room? That’s the baffling bit. Does she keep fruit and vegetables in her room? Or bread and cereal?

@thecatsthecats

My brain must be more evolved then.

Not ever felt as if its a competition. Been taught from an early age the idea of fairness and sharing.

How adorable. No it isn't. You have just, as you say, been socialised into sharing more.

Having been raised differently to you (including learning not to make directly contradictory statements on after the other ), my husband and I have come up with a simple way to manage our different eating habits without affecting the other person's impulses. No idea why you feel superior about that.

I know its not.

I am disputing the idea that you are responding to an innate primal thing which leads you to fight with family members over food.

Its not. Its learned. By your own admission. It can also therefore be unlearned. Instead you use it as a weird justification for why you can't control yourself.

I don't feel superior at all. I just was pissed off at your primal instinct claim.

My DD & DS have their snack boxes in the kitchen a mixture of sweet and savoury snacks. They always ask if they want something. I've found this works well

@cheekychaplin I meant my young dc, obviously not adults.