To let my 8 year old have a snack supply in her room?

[jilllanguage]

My DD is 8 and a couple weeks ago she asked if she could have a snack supply in her bedroom. I said yes but she still needed to ask if she was going to have any out of it. It's unhealthy snacks, mainly chocolate I admit.

She's had it a few weeks and most of it is still there. The bits she's had she has asked me and I've said it's fine. She likes to set it up all nice and just know it's there more than anything I think.

When she told her dad though he phoned me saying there is no need for it and it's encouraging bad eating habits. He thinks she's too obsessional with food as it is at my house. I suppose he does have a point. She is always thinking about what she'll eat next.

However, she's not overweight at all, she's very active, she eats her vegetables (fruit not as keen on), she will leave breakfast/lunch/dinner/dessert/yogurt etc on her plate so she knows when she is full, in fact she never finishes a full meal to be honest.

I don't see a problem with the snack box, if she was eating it without permission etc then I'd take it away but she's not.

AIBU?

Mine have always had a little snack drawer in their rooms. Hasn't done anyone any harm. 2 of them are adults now 🤷🏻‍♀️

I have never limited my DCs access to snacks and sweets you’d let them eat whatever they want from any age, so when they were say 4 they could have endless biscuits?

@cheekychaplin

Why would vermin appear? We don't have vermin in the kitchen so why would we get them in the bedroom by having a few snacks in a drawer?

I was just thinking the same thing.

I think that's part of the reason she wants a treat box, she thinks it adds to her room as she has it sitting out for anyone to see when they walk into her room like a little set up you'd get in a hotel room 😂

That's actually adorable.

She'll be wanting a mini bar and / or drinks cabinet next...

No food in bedrooms ever in this house.

@ABitBesottedWithMyDog

I think that's part of the reason she wants a treat box, she thinks it adds to her room as she has it sitting out for anyone to see when they walk into her room like a little set up you'd get in a hotel room 😂

That's actually adorable.

She'll be wanting a mini bar and / or drinks cabinet next...

Isn't it! Not too soon I hope...🤣

This is a terrible idea. It could set a pattern for snacking that will impact her, and her weight, for the rest of her life.

When I was a child we each had a tin for our own snacks and sweets but it was strictly to be kept downstairs rather than in our rooms. If I remember rightly we were generally allowed to go to it when we wanted and only stopped if we'd had too much already or it was just before a meal.

I think snacks in bedrooms can encourage mindless snacking which while it may not particularly harm her in childhood will not be a healthy habit in later life. Keeping it downstairs means going to the snack box is hopefully more of an intentional thing, rather than just eating because it's right next to her.

@Aquamarine1029

This is a terrible idea. It could set a pattern for snacking that will impact her, and her weight, for the rest of her life.

Or not. 2 of mine are adults now and having a little drawer of snacks in their room didn't affect their weight or their eating habits.

@user1745

When I was a child we each had a tin for our own snacks and sweets but it was strictly to be kept downstairs rather than in our rooms. If I remember rightly we were generally allowed to go to it when we wanted and only stopped if we'd had too much already or it was just before a meal.

I think snacks in bedrooms can encourage mindless snacking which while it may not particularly harm her in childhood will not be a healthy habit in later life. Keeping it downstairs means going to the snack box is hopefully more of an intentional thing, rather than just eating because it's right next to her.

I understand what you're saying but to counter that, she does have to intentionally walk down the stairs and ask me if she can have a snack before she does. But I also don't want to turn this into one of those threads where people tell me I'm being unreasonable and I argue that I'm not!

My DD10 has a snack drawer in her room, like yours she has to ask if she wants something but I usually say yes. She eats healthily otherwise and is as thin as a rake so a few extra snacks don’t worry me 🤷‍♀️

she will leave breakfast/lunch/dinner/dessert/yogurt etc on her plate so she knows when she is full, in fact she never finishes a full meal to be honest.

A good reason to cut out sugary carb snacking.

can we not do anything these days without 'snacks'?

sit in a cinema for one film...or even at home
walk down the street
bowling...ice skating...all involve 'snacks'
shopping trip

snacks which are a full meal at times, or at least a match for calories

now a stash in a kids bedroom

what are these 'snacks'?

I think it's a really bad idea. Keep snacks in the kitchen. Or even better, don't encourage constant snacking. Mine are teens/early 20s and we never got into a snacking habit.

It’s fine and cute that she has it all laid out,

Best not to obsess over food if there’s not a problem.

She sounds like she's applying some self-discipline, and learning to ration, which is a useful skill to learn, because of budgeting and health, at the very least.

can we not do anything these days without 'snacks'?

This bugs me too. I have small children so I'm used to having food on hand in case but EVERYWHERE we go snacks are involved. If we go on any outing or even just for a walk with friends and their DC - all of them bring snacks and we have to stop for a snack every bloody time. It's annoying. The worst is my DC gymnastic classes. They give them bags of sweets after! Like why?! It's a bloody 40minute exercise class. They don't need a bag of sugary shite at the end of it.

Sorry I'm ranting but it's literally every where I go and I'm so fed up with it.

Doesn’t really prove anything, but I had free access to biscuits and chocolate bars as a child and I have always had healthy attitude to food/snacks (eat a balanced diet, rarely overindulge, rarely crave sugary food etc).

I think if she’s treating it more as a presentation than a stash then I think it’s fine. It sounds like she’s good at moderating her consumption and it makes treats less desirable by normalising it.

It sounds as though it's a primarily decorative thing for her. Maybe it's a new little trend (it was mini fridges when my kids were younger - pink ones!)

If she's barely touching the items, that's clearly not a binging on sweets thing going on. Just let her have her little hotel room vibe.

Sounds like it makes her feel a bit grown up. She’s self-regulating what she eats and sounds like she is doing that really well - great life skill to develop and much better to learn that now than to feel treats are forbidden and eat them secretly. Great job all round!

A snack was an apple or bread, growing up. I do remember eating vast quantities of bread and cheese as a teen. Wasn't overweight though.

Biscuits and sweets were treats. Given as aftersfor lunch/ tea or at the weekend. Mainly because of the shopping bill. We always, always asked. I didn't develop an odd relationship with food though.

Dc have the same rules. Fruit as snacks. But not if tea is nearly really. Ds has snack money for school.

We don't have food in bedrooms. I don't know why she needs her own supply, buy things for you both to share.

It’s really not setting up for good habits

I wouldn’t snacks are not needed it’s something we enjoy.

My DD also has a box of chocolates, sweets etc in her room - it’s all the loot from party bags, Halloween and the like. I’m more than happy for her to have it there for the same reasons as you, that is, she has a very healthy approach to eating, and she always asks before having any of it. Sometimes I take something from it for her eg she takes a packed lunch to her sport at the weekend and every so often I’ll take a pudding from her treat box and send it in the packed lunch.
The last time she asked to go into it was at Christmas when she asked me if she could put something from the box in each of her friends’ Christmas cards
Your DD sounds similarly sensible so, no, I wouldn’t worry at all. I wish I’d had that level of self control re sweets as a kid! (Or adult )