To move because dh inherited property?

[bowmejen3]

So I'm born and bred in Hackney. Met my husband here who is originally from south Manchester in one of the largest council estates In Europe apparently.

We've been married 10 years and have two children. (4 and 2 months)

We rent privately and was looking forward to getting on the shared ownership scheme this year! 4 year old settled in nursery waiting for reception etc! However DH has been very stressed and with rising living costs. We have not got much to spare each month after saving for our deposit.

Now here is my aibu.
Dh father recently died and left his house (ex council but bought) to dh. It has no mortgage left.

Dh thinks this is the best thing ever as we could move there (3 bed semi detached, big garden, driveway, extra room for washing etc)
Be mortgage free, near his family and have essentially more disposable income to enjoy life, holidays, other ventures etc.

I know I know it sounds perfect on paper... but I always envisioned raising my children in London but dh claims we are actually being selfish because potentially they will never be able to afford to live near us in the future and we may only ever own 25 percent of a flat!
And the area he is from has not got a great reputation...

I believe he could sell the house for around £240,000 (from Rightmove) and put it down for a deposit on a house in London!

Dh thinks I'm being ridiculous to want to not be mortgage free just for the sake of "London" and being snobby towards his childhood area? (Which I'm not)

Aibu?

It's not a terrible place to live, Hackney. It can be great, in fact - depending on personal preferences, needs, and budget. Like many places it has pros and cons.

But it is an inner city borough that, whilst has some very expensive housing and chi chi shops, restaurants and bars, also has a huge amount of deprivation and other issues. Like many large cities - including Manchester.

It might be that for OP, somewhere completely different - not Manchester or London - would be best. Perhaps a smaller town or city inbetween the two.

Being honest I too would prefer Hackney to Croydon (although Croydon isn't all bad).

But a pp is wrong to say Hackney is all gentrified and lovely. There is gentrification, yes, but there is also huge deprivation.

I’d sell it and use it as a down payment, yes. How much mortgage would you be able to get do you think? What could you afford in London?

@Blossomtoes

I’m a lifelong born Londoner I don’t need lecturing on crime stats from an out-of-towner.

As I said London is massive, the boroughs are large and within them there are areas of lower and higher crime.

If you take Hackney crime stats at face value - crime rate for 2021 is 105 per 1000 people, so 90% of people in Hackney didn’t experience crime in 2021. And if you look at the bar chart - many crimes including vehicle theft, violence + sex offences, drugs, criminal damage + arson aren’t much different to the London average.

Seriously though Croydon isn't all so terrible. It's like a lot of places. It has pros and cons, good and bad.

In fact if OP does want to stay in London, there are several new build help to buy type schemes being built in Croydon - and as it's cheaper than Hackney, she might also be able to afford an outright mortgage (rather than shared ownership).

I don't know where Blossom is from but I'm also a born and bred Londoner - with relatives who are from Hackney.

Have a look at nice places in and around Manchester - Didsbury, Heaton Moor, Heaton Mersey, Charlton, Bramhall. All lovely, family-oriented, leafy suburbs with great schools.

@Tealightsandd

Who says OP needs to stay in Hackney?

Daily stabbings - well there were 27 teens stabbed to death across the whole of London in the whole of 2021, so let’s keep this in perspective.

I’m a lifelong born Londoner I don’t need lecturing on crime stats from an out-of-towner.

Other people don’t have your superior knowledge. I was just helping them out. Hackney is one of the five boroughs with the highest crime rates. 🤷‍♀️

@Tealightsandd

I don't know where Blossom is from but I'm also a born and bred Londoner - with relatives who are from Hackney.

And I have friends who live in Hackney.

Croydon 2021 crime stats are 82/1000 people, which is only 2.3% different from Hackney.

If I wanted to get out of Hackney I wouldn’t go to Croydon.

OP doesn't want to get out of Hackney (although her DH does).

[quote TatianaBis]@Tealightsandd

Who says OP needs to stay in Hackney?

Daily stabbings - well there were 27 teens stabbed to death across the whole of London in the whole of 2021, so let’s keep this in perspective.[/quote]
Lots of non fatal stabbings too.

But I do agree about perspective. Which is what I was trying to get across to OP. She's concerned about stabbings in Manchester, when she lives somewhere where stabbings are far from an unusual occurrence.

Glad you're going to go up and see what it's like over Easter.

I would definitely check out Chorlton and Stockton Heath whilst you're up.

I have just had a quick Rightmove search and the disparity in price is just breathtaking. Even if you sell FIL house and use it as a deposit in London - what you get in Hackney is just tiny.

I love London (& Manchester - lived in both cities), but essentially moved out because we needed more space. Do you ever think you'll need more space? You must really, really love Hackney to sacrifice on space.

My only friends who have stayed in London in zone 1 - 6 (their children are teenagers or late primary school) have been able to afford a house - they earn oodles - bankers / lawyers / architects etc. Literally everyone else has moved out. I am saying this, because your support network now, may well move out

@ShittyFingers

I’m team DH - but what I’d probably do is sell the house and then move to nice part of Manchester

I wouldn’t live in London if I was paid to though

This. Exactly this. (Southerner here)

I think a mortgage free home sounds better.

Alternatively sell the house and buy something you both agree on and in an area you agree on which might not be London or Manchester. With a small mortgage.

Would it not be better to live half way between both your families.

This is so hard, I would agree with you tho. But also understand his POV

But you're not being selfish. Maybe he is for thinking you have to go to his area where he has memories etc and you don't.

@Heyahun

Sorry but London is a great place to raise children I have to disagree with people saying differently

However I think you would be crazy to not take the house and be mortgage free!!
I can't think of anything more freeing

The people saying that have no clue. So many have no idea what London is really like and picture either down and out areas or busy Leicester Square type places. So narrow minded to not realise there are some amazing beautiful places in London. I grew up in Mcr and loved it, moved to London and love even more. Amazing place to bring up kids

Surely you can see a house with garden you own mortgage free if far better then a flat you rent /part own/share

@Tealightsandd

OP doesn't want to get out of Hackney (although her DH does).

As she obviously enjoys living there and has amazingly managed to avoid being stabbed, however, with an inheritance she may consider moving - she's not obliged to stay.

@planningtomakeaplan

London ain't the same place it was. I wouldn't bring my kids up there, given a choice.

What do you mean by that exactly?

The place I was brought up which used to be full of gun crime and shit schools, now has some of the best state schools in the country and is spilling over with artisan bakeries, is that what you mean?

I really hope you don't mean it's more racially mixed these days than it was in the mid 20th century, which is often what people really mean when I hear them say that (elderly racists types who moved out of Hackney decades ago. Sadly have met a few of these).

@planningtomakeaplan I mean the gun and knife crime has gone through the roof. County lines is now a thing. Gangs are all over the place. Nothing to do with race at all.

I worry for my nieces and nephews. Given the chance, everyone I know would rather get their kids out to somewhere else.

I've moved away and I wouldn't want to live there again.

But it's all relative, if your experience of London is the gentrified, nice leafy 'safe' areas, then your opinion is going to be different to mine, formed in the endz where you take your life in your hands going about your business every day.

I remember Hackney before it was gentrified. I grew up not too far from there. I also remember my area before it became a gang war zone. When it was a nice place to live.

I'd rather live in a mortgage free home in Manchester than London, any day of the week.

County lines is now a thing.

Do you know county lines means things are cross-country?

@bowmejen3 I would choose London over Manchester any day, I’m very surprised how pro Manchester everyone seem to be on here. To grow up and enjoy their teens I. London is worth not being mortgage free. IMO

I'm just retching that £240,000 is considered a deposit for a house in London. I could buy a 3 bed detached with that where I live

How much would your mortgage actually be OP?