To move because dh inherited property?

[bowmejen3]

So I'm born and bred in Hackney. Met my husband here who is originally from south Manchester in one of the largest council estates In Europe apparently.

We've been married 10 years and have two children. (4 and 2 months)

We rent privately and was looking forward to getting on the shared ownership scheme this year! 4 year old settled in nursery waiting for reception etc! However DH has been very stressed and with rising living costs. We have not got much to spare each month after saving for our deposit.

Now here is my aibu.
Dh father recently died and left his house (ex council but bought) to dh. It has no mortgage left.

Dh thinks this is the best thing ever as we could move there (3 bed semi detached, big garden, driveway, extra room for washing etc)
Be mortgage free, near his family and have essentially more disposable income to enjoy life, holidays, other ventures etc.

I know I know it sounds perfect on paper... but I always envisioned raising my children in London but dh claims we are actually being selfish because potentially they will never be able to afford to live near us in the future and we may only ever own 25 percent of a flat!
And the area he is from has not got a great reputation...

I believe he could sell the house for around £240,000 (from Rightmove) and put it down for a deposit on a house in London!

Dh thinks I'm being ridiculous to want to not be mortgage free just for the sake of "London" and being snobby towards his childhood area? (Which I'm not)

Aibu?

On tax, the estate could be liable for inheritance tax if the total estate exceeds the threshold but only on that proportion that exceeds it.

CGT is only on any gain in value of an asset since the date of death.

So if you sell soon, with little increase in value, there's probably no CGT (because everyone gets an annual allowance).

If you hold onto it, let it out and sell up in a few years, then there'd be CGT on any increase in value. (Though there are various reliefs, so you'd need to do the calculation and might not owe a lot).

But if you sell/leave your main residence and move there, there'd be no CGT when you later move on, as you don't pay it on your main home.

Check the inheritance tax first and any ither fees. Can you cover these? If not. Then I would sell and buy another house in Manchester. I would want to raise my kids in london. But your jobs also play a factor

You are being snobby. I'd take Manchester over London anyway but I'm a mancunian so biased. I'd sell his childhood home and buy in a nicer part of Manchester with good schooling. If you don't overstretch yourselves you could get a smaller mortgage and hopefully overpay and work towards being mortgage free in 10 years or so. You'd then be able to use that money for whatever you wanted.

Manchester isn't the same as London though, it's got a lot if the same or similar attractions and is a lively city but London has its own magic.

With all the uncertainty with electric and all other bills rising,
I'd snap up the option of being mortgage free and have a lifestyle you will never achieve in London.
It doesn't sound like you'd ever achieve that in Hackney, the kids could be closer to other family members and you could potentially use some of the spare money you won't be ploughing into a mortgage to help save for your children's futures- its looking more and more likely that the only way our children's generation will buy is with help from earlier generations.

If the estate is that bad, can't you sell and take on a smaller mortgage for somewhere close to there but not on that particular estate? Cut down on your housing costs massively.

Or you might as well stick a pin in a map and move to fuck knows where, just because the houses are cheaper.

^This. And where your dc can breathe cleaner air. Personally I wouldn't have wanted to bring my dc up in London or Manchester, or in the middle of any big city tbh.

@Sceptre86

You are being snobby. I'd take Manchester over London anyway but I'm a mancunian so biased. I'd sell his childhood home and buy in a nicer part of Manchester with good schooling. If you don't overstretch yourselves you could get a smaller mortgage and hopefully overpay and work towards being mortgage free in 10 years or so. You'd then be able to use that money for whatever you wanted.

Manchester isn't the same as London though, it's got a lot if the same or similar attractions and is a lively city but London has its own magic.

Jesus Christ, it's not snobby to not want to move into an area with high crime and not great schools at secondary level. It's just practical.

If you live there, your existing connections and fondness of the place may override that, but if you don't - why would you want to?

And I say that, having grown up in a level with high crime levels that had a bad reputation, and which I was very fond of.

*An area, not a level! (Fat fingers!)

@Nowayoutonlydown

With all the uncertainty with electric and all other bills rising, I'd snap up the option of being mortgage free and have a lifestyle you will never achieve in London. It doesn't sound like you'd ever achieve that in Hackney, the kids could be closer to other family members and you could potentially use some of the spare money you won't be ploughing into a mortgage to help save for your children's futures- its looking more and more likely that the only way our children's generation will buy is with help from earlier generations.

If the estate is that bad, can't you sell and take on a smaller mortgage for somewhere close to there but not on that particular estate? Cut down on your housing costs massively.

You're not factoring in the higher wages in London or investment of a house rising much faster in London.

I did pretty much exactly what's being proposed - left London and live mortgage free in an ex council house. (Although it's not on a rough estate with a bad rep).

I reckon that decision has cost me in excess of £400k. (Given my current house is worth about £250k, this is a lot!)

Why not give it s try? You may be surprised

@bowmejen3

Yes it's in wythenshawe, close to Northenden/Gatley..

The prices there are going up.. so that's an actual excellent suggestions to perhaps live there, sell the property and buy in a different area.

But to those who say they wouldn't raise their children in London, why?

I had a great childhood, went to school on the tube by 13. Went to museums most weekends. As a teenager, I was NEVER BORED. Always something new to explore.
Dh actually said he wish he was brought up here a few years ago as he was really bored in wythenshawe!

London ain't the same place it was. I wouldn't bring my kids up there, given a choice.

London ain't the same place it was. I wouldn't bring my kids up there, given a choice.

What do you mean by that exactly?

The place I was brought up which used to be full of gun crime and shit schools, now has some of the best state schools in the country and is spilling over with artisan bakeries, is that what you mean?

I really hope you don't mean it's more racially mixed these days than it was in the mid 20th century, which is often what people really mean when I hear them say that (elderly racists types who moved out of Hackney decades ago. Sadly have met a few of these).

Haven't ran away! Been reading all the comments etc.
I've been showing dh this thread, I also explained that until FIL passed away, we always had our life set up for London and agreed. We could have bought a house years ago in wythenshawe if that's what he really wanted.

I have spent a lot of time in the area, which isn't too bad but it's what I witness on the community group that scares me. Every night DH is like
"Oh look a old school friends daughter has been attacked on the tram"
"Oh another house robbed "
"Another child stabbed"

And this is nearly every night I've had to listen to these comments. Until recently now he's trying to make out this is far and few between.

My husband is a great man, so is his family and I'm sure thousands of people who live there are great people. But there is a reason he has chose to live in London for the past 18 years! Way before he met me!

I have looked at surrounding areas (Warrington? Stockton heath, Appleton?) and also Chester and The Wirral. Then Crewe, perhaps even the midlands! and suggested selling the house, using it as a big deposit for a house there now he's all of a sudden pro north.
Which he said is not the idea, then we might aswell do that down here!

I think we will spend Easter in wythenshawe and let it sink in, he might take his rose tinted glasses off of it being the same when in reality! Everything would have changed since he lived there as a teenager!

Oh yes to answer questions!
DH is a area manager for a well known food store.
I am currently not in work but I am a clinical psychologist

I think we will spend Easter in wythenshawe and let it sink in, he might take his rose tinted glasses off of it being the same when in reality!

Equally, you might find you quite like it. ☺️

@Blossomtoes

I think we will spend Easter in wythenshawe and let it sink in, he might take his rose tinted glasses off of it being the same when in reality!

Equally, you might find you quite like it. ☺️

I hope I do! It would be great if I was completely onboard and not London tinted.

My in-laws have amazing lives, always on holiday, lovely things etc. nice gardens. Children doing well, go hobbies etc.

It's just my idea of a great successful life differs from them. I don't think living in an apartment is a bad thing where as to most Manchester people it seems it's like equivalent to living in the ghetto and depriving my children of a garden.

I wish I felt as passionate as DH because on paper it does seem like a no brainer
It's just my heart is not in it right now for some reason

Yanbu.
You live in London, you work in London, you have a life in London. Yes, you could move, but you don’t need a reason to move or stay. If you don’t want to you don’t have to

I've lived in both cities & sorry I wouldn't want to raise a family in Manchester. I've never felt unsafe in London

have spent a lot of time in the area, which isn't too bad but it's what I witness on the community group that scares me. Every night DH is like
"Oh look a old school friends daughter has been attacked on the tram"
"Oh another house robbed "
"Another child stabbed"

Did you grow up in an obscure sleepy village that just so happened to share its name with an inner London borough, OP?

Because otherwise I'm quite bemused. It's impossible to grow up in inner London (or even outer London nowadays) and not be very aware of the daily stabbings and other violent crime.

That includes in and around the social housing estates of Hackney. (And no, I'm not being a snob. I have relatives who grew up in Hackney social housing).

Seriously. If you really are from Hackney, you'll find Manchester no worse - and perhaps better.

I can completely understand not wanting to leave your home city - particularly if you want to stay close to family and support networks. But you don't mention your family (are you close? Do they still live in London?) and seem fixated on a fear that Manchester...because of the crime that so blights London!

If that's the only thing holding you back, you'd be mad not to take the opportunity. A cramped overpriced, likely shoddily constructed, new build in London - that you only part own and still have to pay rent on. Or a spacious, owned outright house with a garden in a different in a different city - where your dc will have family around (you mention your DH's family still being in or near to Manchester).

It's a no brainer. I say that as a born and bred Londoner.

Manchester is great and lots of family friendly areas. But you'd be crazy to live mortgage free in Wythenshawe when you could put down a very decent deposit on a house in a much nicer area. Whether that's London or Manchester depends on how far you're willing to stretch I guess. But when ppl say Manchester is a great place to live, they aren't talking about Wythenshawe, I think you'd be crazy to live there even mortgage free. Most areas of Manchester you can get something decent for 4-500k, so you'd be able to put down a very decent deposit.

The thing with London crime stats is that you have to factor in that London is massive with a huge population. Crime is very area dependent. And there are areas of London where the crime is low.

@TatianaBis

The thing with London crime stats is that you have to factor in that London is massive with a huge population. Crime is very area dependent. And there are areas of London where the crime is low.

Unfortunately Hackney isn’t one of them.

crimerate.co.uk/london/hackney

@TatianaBis

The thing with London crime stats is that you have to factor in that London is massive with a huge population. Crime is very area dependent. And there are areas of London where the crime is low.

But OP is from Hackney. Which is where OP says she grew up. Even if it was one of the gentrification million plus homes, it would be impossible to ignore or not notice the gang crime, stabbings, and robberies that happen frequently in Hackney.

Cross-posted with Blossom

I do think when considering it you are comparing apples with oranges. An equivalent in Manchester to Hackney is probably somewhere like Heaton Chapel or Withington which wouldn’t have been considered great in the past but are now gentrified and lovely. Wythenshawe is more like maybe Croydon? I’d choose hackney over wythenshawe but East Didsbury over Clapham. We have lives in a nice and rough area in both Manchester and london and while I loved being in my twenties in london as soon as we had kids and finances took a hit we moved. We could never afford our lifestyle in london.

And no offence to Croydon- I lived there and liked it although it was a bit rough. No one wanted to visit me though .